will2000uk

I'm sure Alan Moore would have an ironic chuckle at the superficial treatment of his work. That's not to say it's a train-wreck flop, but I do honestly wonder who it's supposed to appeal to and what the point was.

It sounds odd, but the film it reminds me of most is Daredevil- there is a playful narrative structure, a desire for a "darker" comic book film and a degree of campness that is either unwitting or woefully misjudged.

For those who don't know the plot, essentially someone is killing off superheroes and a gravelly voiced man in an ink blot mask (Rosarch) is investigating. The superheroes themselves are now retired (except the aforementioned tar gargler) and suffering various personal issues.

The problem is that things have come full circle- The Comedian looks too much like Robert Downey Jr, the issues of a double life have been better explored elsewhere, and Sin City has already provided us with gaudy, superficial shocks and violence. Granted, none of these film adaptations would exist without Watchmen's subversiveness, but it still feels like an ageing hipster trying to prove he's "with it".

And then we come to "visionary director" Zak Synder. What is clear is that he loves Watchmen, and tries his best to match it. But it's like a fairground caricaturist painting Mona Lisa- I'm sure he means well, but it's not the real thing. Now I'm sorry, but in my opinion the "visionary" tag belongs to people like Stanley Kubrick, David Lean or Orson Welles. Pretty pictures and ludicrously OTT violence doesn't make you an A-list director, nor does the vast sum of money a film might make (though in this case more likely from kids sneaking in).

If this sounds harsh, it's not because Watchmen is a bad film. The Dr Manhattan storyline is well handled, and adds some much needed pathos and tragedy to an otherwise superficial story. As Gilliam rightly predicted, the running time of a film doesn't allow sufficient room to breathe for the other characters, so we aren't give enough to sufficiently care about them.

In short, a good metaphor for the film is its soundtrack- for every clever use of Bob Dylan and Simon and Garfunkel, we get the ill-judged Leonard Cohen Hallelujah (a great song now sadly overexposed) or 99 Red Balloons. If you can forget the comic, if you don't mind excessive violence and slow motion and not that bothered about character development, by all means go and see it.

Roald Dahl knew as much as anyone that kids love things a bit darker, a bit more menacing. Nick Park seems far removed from Dahl, but the truth is the dark has always been there, it's just people haven't bothered to look.

Matter Of Loaf And Death was great BECAUSE it pushed the boundaries. It would be so easy to coast and take Sony's Yankee dollar. But Nick Park isn't like that.

I admire him because this is his creation and he always seems to come up with something surprise him. The clever film references, the delightful puns (Citizen Canine!) all well handled.

And seriously, didn't anyone else find Fluffie's relationship with Gromit sweet? Or perhaps I'm getting sentimental in my old age.

Anyhoo, I loved it.

It's amazing how quickly an incident get blown out of proportion. It's a shame then that this means many people are missing out on a fine programme due to ignorance and prejudice.

While Russell Brand is often portrayed as a sex maniac, this often contrasts with intellectual musings and razor sharp comic timing. If you haven't read My Booky Wook, you won't be aware of the struggle he has got to this point.

Then again (as witnessed here) he's not afraid to poke fun at himself. Reading from a school report about his "unusual haircut" and "showing off" he retorts "That's my career!"

As for the show itself, it sounds quite generic- host makes quips about old TV clips. Clive James, James Carr, Jo Brand and endless others have made this a genre, before Harry Hill effectively put his stamp on it.

Russell Brand effectively interweaves the clips within a routine on numerous subjects eg family or pets. He veers from wild energy to bemusement to outright incredulity. His power comes from his unpredictability, making each episode both baffling and hilarious.

Seriously, give Ponderland a chance and you'll see why he deserves his success.

If you find the opening credits funny, then you will love this wonderfully absurd film. Of course, if you're not in touch with your inner idiot, you will be bewildered and ask "Why is this funny?"

Like Charlie says in Charlie And The Chocolate Factory "candy doesn't have to have a point." This is a film that revels in its oddball stupidity.

Will Arnett is funny for me simply by his facial expressions and tone of voice (I often quote "Michael. Selfish, selfish Michael" in my head.) Will Forte (who also wrote) is adept at twisting audience's expectations, the two Solomon brothers completely unaware of their actions. Kirsten Wiig, a superb comedy actress, is in a relatively straighter role here, but still pulls it off well.

In short, if you want wit and sophistication, watch Robert Altman's The Player. If you want depth and moral ambiguity, watch Fight Club or A Clockwork Orange.

If you just want to amuse yourself laughing at idiots, this film will please no end.

I love this film more than any film on the planet. My favourite is when they go "Citizens on Patrol! Baba bu daba buh ba ba!" That is so funny.

Who can forget when the crazy man shouted? Or when the quiet black woman suddenly shouts? Or the man with A BIG GUN shoots at things inappropriately?

But my favourite is Noise Man. Ting! Ting! Ting! Swish! Swish! He's an alarm clock in a shopping bag! Then he pretends to be dubbing and I laugh.

But there is also a serious point- early policemen are dangerous and are not to be trusted. I sympathise with the general for he is living in a vortex of buffoonery!

All in all, I would recommend this film to anyone with lungs.

PROCTOR!!!!!!

I love Reeves And Mortimer in a way that can only be described via dance. However since you cannot see my dance, I will review it.

Reeves And Mortimer are geniuses. Who else could make farting Frenchman, pan fights and a pub in an organ so monumentally hilarious? Shooting Stars is the one everyone remembers but this is so good I'd like to cover it in fudge.

For those that are not initiated, the show was divided between many bizarre sketches (70's glam band Slade on holiday, Men In Bras, numerous TV mickey takes) and the pair's rather bizarre attempts to host a show, usually interrupted by Uncle Peter and a man demanding "booze for'baby".

In short buy it, treasure it and praise the lemonade for this fine pair!

So Hotpot thinks the flying loses the film its serious edge? Since when did it have to be serious? He is clearly not familiar with the concept of the Wudan stories. Crouching Tiger (Or Wo hu zang long) is the fairy tale equivalent of the Matrix. Just as Matrix operates within sci-fi conventions, this film operates within Wudan principles. If you aren't prepared to accept the conventions of this film (ie the flying), you won't enjoy it. I myself was totally immersed in a film of pure character. Each fight sequence has an emotional level beyond the powerful choreography of The Matrix. Unlike MI2, this advances flo mo rather than using it as another cinematic device. Okay, for some it will be overlong, but the film for me goes beyond typical film ideas. In the words of Mr Glass, "This is art!"

Films like American Beauty are sharp, but Xala's theatrical style and unrelenting debasement of Senegalese society is worthy of far more Oscars than the frankly over-rated A.B.

Without the distraction of stars and tricky camera work, Xala is straight to the point, and makes no attempt to beautify or wax lyrical about their country in the midst of corruption and lies.

I recommend this film to someone with an open mind and a love of pure cinema.

Whoever couldn't find anything positive about this film must've been brought up on laissez faire, straight down the middle band movies. Ghost Dog is not a film definable by plot, action or character. It is more a series of vignettes based on Ghost Dog's philosphy. The film is rich in irony, esp. the interaction between the French ice cream guy and Ghost Dog (Ironically, they nearly always reflect what the other says.) The film deliberatly contradicts gangster conventions, and the amazing cinematography adds to the detachment of us from an intriguing killer, similar to Leon, but minus much of the warmth, but retaining the skewed morality. The gangsters in the film are easy to kill, because Ghost Dog's only real threat is Louis, who he isn't allowed to kill, building up to a simple, dignified climax, and a neat closing philosophy. Well done, Jim. 9/10

The craziest, funniest, brilliant film! Every single moment of this film gives me something that amuses me, and the minute I stopped watching I wanted to watch again...In fact, I did. Each character, from Nigel Tuffnell to Artie Fufkin, puts a smile on my face the second I think about their funny lines... And the legendary Stone 'Enge sequence rates amongst the truly excellent film moments! Not a documentary, or a "mockumentary", but a big rockin' ROCKUMENTARY! 100% brilliant

20 minutes long. Black and white. Focusing on one cart driver. Sounds pretty c**p, huh? Wrong! The film makes excellent satirical points on the class divide, as well as providing some excellent, if somewhat crude, camera work. However, it's depth puts many movies to shame.

No, of course not. A lot of people have missed the point about Shaft 2000. It's a slick action movie with a racial political edge, but whoever is dissing it in terms of plot and acting has missed the point entirely. Shaft is the ultimate Saturday night movie. Having gone through the depression of watching England lose 1-0 to Germany, Shaft instantly rose my spirits (that and news of Kevin Keegan resigning from the England job.) If ever anything gets too silly or cheesy, Samuel L.Jackson is always there to remind you what you came to see. And Peoples Hernandez is a terrific villain (The interplay between him and Shaft is terrific.) In context, a more than worthy 9/10. See it. You'll be glad you did!

There are so many amazing elements of Gladiator, I can't really describe it. Having been to Rome before watching Gladiator, I can confirm that you can imagine it to be exactly like that. The cast (including the indomitable Russell Crowe, the honourable Richard Harris, delightfully sleazy Oliver Reed and terrific villainous Jaqouin Phoenix) all add to a destined classic. A majestic 10/10

Straight-down-the-middle, by-the-numbers, average Farelly stuff.

Compare this to Being John Malkovich, and it's like a rich, juicy steak compared to a Big Mac. It's bland, easy junk food cinema. For all it's bad points (Charlie, over-emphasised plot, an over-serious dwarf.) it's good points (the genius loudmouth triplets, Whitey, Hank shows up) just save it. If you come looking for the auteur work of the Farelly's, you'll be dissapointed. It just isn't stupid enough. If you want intellectual enterainment, watch the Coen brothers or Being John Malkovich.

If you want a time-filling, pleasing comedy, Me, Myself and Irene does it's job (Like the over-rated There's Something About Mary.) The Farellys are swiftly becoming a one-trick pony. Their next film has to be a hit, or they'll look Dumb And Dumber.

All hail the insane genius of Spike Jonze! I fell in love with this film from the brilliant opening puppet show. Treating us to a bizarre ride through life (Like people ride Malkovich....Eh?), Jonze goes through more emotions and styles than several films, with both believable and insane characters thrust into the same situation and (often) the same head. Also, three superb cameo appearances: Charlie Sheen (Like John, his greatest role is as himself.), Sean Penn on puppetry, and a leering Brad Pitt (look carefully.) This deserved Best Picture over the formulaic Insider and the mundane American Beauty. Special mention to John himself: A truly brilliant performance. This film should be seen by everyone by law. View the world through a completly different set of eyes.

Yes, the credits alone put many so-called comedies to shame. One of the funniest films I've ever seen, with it's own skewed logic (" You mother was a hamster, and your father smelled of elderberries.", "You silly Arthur King") Of course, you have to mention the Knights Who Say Ni. I have never laughed so hard at a two letter word, and then the other one.. "Ekky Ekky Vakung..." (Whatever, I can't say it.) The cinematography, camera angles and slow motion sequences all mock the typical epic (Sir Lancelot's sequence has to be seen to be believed.) And above all, where else would someone accuse Sir Lancelot of being gay? 9/10, for a slightly slow start and head-scratching ending ("GET ON WITH IT!")

WARNING! TWO MILD SPOILERS TO FILM. First of all, I am disgusted by people who describe this as a "turkey". Financially, it is the polar opposite. In terms of satisfaction...it is the opposite. True, it is not without fault: For a real-life film, it is full of stereotypes (Bar confrontation with boss and community, two characters fight, then one saves the other etc). It also has quite a slow start. But it is genuinely emotional, and it requires both patience and emotion from the viewer. If you refuse to enjoy this film, you won't do. Go in with an open mind and you'll have a whale of a time!

Don't be fooled by hype, by critics or the multiple awards. American Beauty, like it's namesake, is aesethetic, with nothing deep below the surface. Sam Mendes is betrayed by his theatrical background, which renders his images as 2D tableau. It has impressive moments, and Kevin Spacey is a fine actor, but a lack of motivation, drive or substantial plot means it is incapable of providing a satisfying message or characterization. The teenagers exist as a limp sub-plot, the neighbour is a cartoon caricature worthy of Dick Dastardly (but not as funny) Annete Benning's falseness goes way beyond her character, and the whole thing is nothing more than pretty pictures. I was told (by a v. close friend) , "You take what you can from it, you draw your own opinion." This was the case. However, all there was to be taken was some aesthetic pleasure, occasionally interestic camera work, some funny lines, some dramatic moments... and Kevin Spacey. Look closer...Look beyond hype.

A truly brilliant film, typical of the Coens' ability to twist genres. Here they deconstruct the ransom movie, but plant in twists, dream sequences and bowling. If all this sounds odd to you, then trust me, it is. Steve Buschemi (as ever) is superb, if a little underused as butthead Donny. John Goodman is a superb shouty Nam vet with a brilliant catchphrase "AM I RIGHT, OR Am I WRONG?". And to complement these two superb Coen regulars, Jeff Bridges does a superbly relaxed turn as Jeffrey "The Dude" Lebowski (He bowls in his dressing gown, man!) The Searchers-esque intro is brilliant, and "The Stranger" is one of the funniest voiceovers ever, apart from the British one that does Earthworm Jim. In short, enjoy the twisted world of the Coens!

I love this movie, and it's crude cultiness improves on video. Music,drama, romance, (SPOILER) implants and the confusion between Brits and Frenchmen. What more do you want? Ah, less lag in the middle. Screw you! 9/10

I wanted to enjoy Fight The Future, but it lacked a draw. True, it had all the elements of the X-Files and a (WARNING: SPOILER!)..... potential bomb situation at the start (a good start, but it lacked suspense.) I fell asleep near the end, and I wound up not caring. A disappointment, but not too bad. An average 5/10

It was not until watching this film that I grew a soft spot for Disney movies. The typical combination of music, comedy, drama and romance is perfect? Hang on... Did I just say drama? Yes, The Lion King has moments of pure drama unrivalled by many feature films, let alone Disney films. WARNING!SPOILER!.......... When Mufasa dies, and you see Simba's tears, the mournful music...IT'S TOO MUCH! ;( I also love this film for it's use of top British talent, ie

Rowan Atkinson as Zazu and Jeremy Irons as Scar (Is there anybody who can do better bumpkins and villains?) Indeed, there is a fine ensemble cast, and Matthew Broderick has never been better (with the exception of his turn in The Cable Guy.) People here have mentioned the comparison to Shakespeare, particuarly to Hamlet. But Robert Guillaume's turn as Rafiki bears more relation to King Lear's Fool. Indeed, through manipulating Shakespeare and using an original story, Disney found the ability to reach it's pinnacle. Oh, yeah, and Timon and Pumbaa made my laugh my ass off (The word "Mook" is now part of my vocabulary.) Brilliant 10/10

Batman: Dark, Gothic Comic Classic. Batman Returns: Some great touches, but where's the plot? Batman Forever: A glossy, exciting family fun version

with a brilliant cast.(But not quite as good as Batman.) Batman and Robin is a shame to all concerned, and I salute George Clooney for retrieving a career from the jaws of filth. I condemn Uma Thurman for derstroying her Pulp Fiction cool with two awful, awful films (Believe me, this and The Avengers are as bad as they say. DON'T FIND OUT FOR YOURSELF.) The editing is truly awful, Batgirl is brought at a totally inappropriate moment, and the final sequence is like a giant advert for the toys...which essentially it is. Coolio's cameo appearance is wasted, and the reference to A Clockwork Orange (some droogs in the background in one scene.) is truly awful, and is there for the writers to kid themselves that they are intellectual. Finally, George Clooney is obviously miscast as Batman (He looks the part, that's it), Robin has turned into an obnoxious brat and the Poison Ivy love potion is worse than Saturday morning cartoon stuff (indeed, the cartoons are vastly superior than this drivel.) Arnie is not bad as Mr Freeze, but even his screen presence can't save a truly horrendous film. IN SHORT, THROW YOUR PETS INTO A VAT OF ACID RATHER THAN WATCH THIS MOVIE.

Some films make you realise that there are still geniuses in the film world. Leon is fantastic both emotionally, and visually. The light straining through bulletholes, the secret knock on the door and a superb end shootout are all elements of an incredible film. Gary Oldman is admittedly a bit hammy, but aside from that I can find no critisisms (with the exception of being renamed "The Professional", why?). This film is a modern classic which all should see. 10/10

This is a truly, superbly crafted animated film. I had a permenant grin on my face, and featuring some of the world's most brilliant dialogue, (" I don't want to be in a pie. I don't even like gravy" to name but one terrific line.) Great characters, great moments and an almost non-existent lag in the middle. Chicken Run is "not as good as I expected. It's better!" 9/10