Dr Mysterioso

With all the hyped-up reality TV programming currently on the air, basically every major network is coming up with new reality shows. This has got to be the absolute bottom. Temptation Island is a show about a group of people who go to a deserted island (where else?) with a significant other, and strippers try to woo the guy away from his girlfreind.

It is the stupidest premise for a reality show, and THAT is saying something, considering all reality TV shows are garbage. In the fact that people watch couples get torn apart from they're loved ones by strippers while people watch it on TV for entertainment really makes you think about where the human race is heading.

American High is one of the worst TV shows I have ever seen.

First off, they try to capitalize on the success of Survivor, by making a million knockoffs of it, without realizing what a terrible show itself it is. And they have the most godawful camerawork known to man. It is bad, but in a good merit, it makes it seem more realisitic, not like Survivor.

But that's not what makes the show terrible. What does is the fact that every single kid on this show is an obnoxious, self-destructive loser who all do nothing but party. An excellent example of this is the character Morgan. He introduces us to the show by saying "Blow your arm off, and suffer the consequences". Then he says "never do homework, and just party". Then, he says, "my biggest fear is not becoming something in life". That is the most bizarre and ironic thing I have ever heard.

Oh, and they only show the glamorous side of high school. Every character is happy, is always having fun, and has a girlfriend/boyfriend, or they play sports, an so on. Okay, sure.

I can't take this anymore. People actually have to sit at home and watch TV to see real life. That is so sad.

Ironically, this show is so incredibly far from reality, it's even more depressing that all 50 billion (I am exaggerating) people who watch it think it's real. They have bloopers on the DVD, for God's sake! It's all scripted! They have sets! Why do you think the camera movement was so smooth?

I think the most disturbing aspect of this show is what some people will do for a million bucks. They go to a desert island and eat rats. People actually watched this for fun. And now Survivor 2 is coming out, then Survivor 3 and Survivor 4, and so on.

Strange. Most things like these are just passing fads. I would have expected Survivor 2 to be cancelled quickly. But people just can't seem to get enough of watching other people suffering on TV and loving every second of it.

To be honest, the first FF game I played was the very first game, which I played at a friends house many years ago. Now, after I played Final Fantasy 7, I really think this is the best one in the series. The plot is wonderful, and Cloud's character development is incredible. The fighting became tedious after a while, but oh well.

This is the beginning of the great Final Fantasy legacy. Some of the cheapest graphics create a wonderful game and what was to be the start of some of the best video games ever produced. But this one has it all: gem-eating titans, time-travelling, witches, elementals and so much more.

Big Money Hustlaz is one of the biggest laugh riots I've ever seen. The entire thing makes fun of mainstream rappers and blaxploitation movies. I actually had to turn it off at one point to retain oxygen in my lungs from howlin' at Jamie Madrox & the Monoxide Child (from the band Twiztid), who both play the two funniest characters in this movie.

But it's ONLY 4 JUGGALOS! Don't you dare watch this movie if you aren't a fan of ICP.

And if you are, there's enough Clown Love for everyone!

This film is absolutely brilliant. It is absolutely amazing. It is incredibly disturbing and actually makes you think about the people living next door. Could your neighbor be a pedophile or a phone-sex pervert? I think it was kind of sickening for some people to be entertained by this dark film.

Marie Baie Des Anges, is quite simply, a highly under-rated French art picture. It is one of my favorite films, because of Maneul Pradal's unique way of storytelling, using visuals to convey the piece.

No, the plot doesn't really go anywhere. In the last 20 minutes or so, it doesn't even make any sense. But that's the whole point. It's symbolic. It isn't going anywhere because the lives of Marie and Orso aren't going anywhere. They are lost, troubled youth; who's only refuge is each other, and a deserted island off the coast of France.

This movie is about Brad Pitt yelling at the camera, telling the world how f***ed up it is. That's basically it. There's also a sub-plot about some guys terrorizing office buildings in Delaware for no apparent reason, because they hate conformity for some reason, I think.

That said, it is the most boring load of ....... INSERT PROFANITY OF CHOICE HERE ..... since...oh, who cares?

Boy, Mark Wahlberg really can act. And damn good, too. Isn't that something?

This film is a very intense character study. You love the characters, because of all the horrible things that happen to them (bad family life, drug overdoses, etc.), and yet you hate them because of all the bad things they do to themselves which, ironically, cause most of the horrible things that happen to them.

Past that, this movie has wonderful acting, a wonderful script, wonderful camerawork, wonderful acting, and so on.

And afterwards I spent three hours vomiting stomach acid into a bucket.

So, in a few words, this show disgusts me.

If I remember correctly, I watched the episode where one of the angels talks to a young girl who worships Satan and says "the lord loves you, even if you did steal Marylin Manson CD's". Yes, I think that is what she said. There is no more disgusting show on TV, besides Pokemon and Full House, of course. It is so sickeningly sweet it makes my teeth fall out!

REN AND STIMPY RULES! One of the best cartoon shows of all time, it is sidesplittingly funny in the fact that it is so repulsively disgusting. Ren is a psychopath and Stimpy is an idiot. What more do you want? Watch them share many adventures with Powdered Toastman and other assorted characters.

Of course, being the sickest thing on TV, it was banned from it, because everybody is a hypocrite. Oh well, just look for it at a video store.

The pinnacle of all manga and anime films. The "Citizen Kane" if you will.

The animation is simply stunning. It was all hand drawn. It's like comparing CD's and records. Cd's have better quality, digital sound, and dynamics. But vinyl just feels better. The sound is real. Like Akira's animation. Speaking of records, the soundtrack is, for lack of a better word, INCREDIBLE.

However, it's extremely violent. Not as violent as, say, "Legend Of The Overfiend", but more violent than "Pokemon" (no, I take that back).

Of course, much of the anime films released today mirror on this picture, but it will always be a groundbreaking film because of the way it was presented. A science-fiction film about how humans like to play with technology and the questions it raises, even if we can't understand them.

Say hello to DOLEMITE, the baddest mofo in all of blaxploitation-land, magically transferred to celluloid by Rudy Ray Moore, the second baddest mofo in all of blaxploitation-land!

To put it lightly, Dolemite is a cinematic masterpiece. Starting with the incredibly complicated use of camerawork. An excellent example of mise-en-scene, that should be studied in film schools coast to coast, is a shot where the shadows of the camera crew are quite visible. Stunning. And all those magic boom shots, where the microphone penetrates the frame. Wow.

Let's not forget the Oscar-worthy acting. Rudy Ray Moore should be honored and have a shrine built to him next to Buckingham Palace for his portrayal in this masterpiece.

By far, the most admirable quality of this motion picture is the beautifully-coreographed stunt work. "The Shadow Kick Of Doom" must have had years in the preparation for Rudy Ray to execute properly. Just think, putting your hand up to a guy's belly and jiggling it rapidly ain't just playin' around! You could kill someone that way.

(Oh, and in case you can't tell, this is all a big joke.)

In short, Dolemite has more corn than...wherever it is that corn is. It's terrible. But it is such an excellent example of B-Movie making it's just too fun to pass up.