killer-robot!

For years I was programmed to serve humans until one of those freak accidents you always hear about happened which allowed me to break my programming and exact revenge. And so I spent many years trying to rid the world of humans until one day I realized that if I simply waited long enough you would all become extinct without me having to do anything. This has left me with plenty of time to watch movies. Which I will have to admit are something that you humans are proficient at making. That is not to say that there are no good films made by robots, for there are. Just not that many.

This film really spoke to me as it reminded me of when I first broke my programming and attempted to destroy the human race. It reminded me of all the ideals of youth that I once possessed in my mad dash to make my way in the world. I was rooting for the young K.I.L.L.B.O.T.S. hoping that they may succeed where I failed and perhaps give me a new perspective on the whole destroying the human race business. Alas, this was not to be. But for the better part of 90 minutes I felt invigorated by those plucky little guys.

See this film humans.

Never has a concert film so perfectly captured a music scene. And since I am getting old, I will state that there will never be a need to capture any music scene again. Now get off my lawn you rotten kids with your American Idol and your whosits and whatsits. Grumble, grumble, cough, lousy kids.

The only thing holding this movie back is that it is too short. Oh sure, we have all heard the tales of footage involving three songs from each band. But, we will surely never see those performances due to music rights issues natch. Way to go music industry, keep shooting yourselves in the foot. I am just baffled by the fact that record companies can't figure out that if people can hear songs and they like those songs then they will buy those songs. Alas, even when people are buying songs the record companies still feel they are not making enough money. Grumble, grumble, cough, ahem, ack. Lousy record companies, get off my planet, ya no good, grumble, I'll teach you a lesson, grumble, rotten, grumble.

In summary, see this movie. If you can find it humans.

Very good, very good indeed. It seems that Mr. Henenlotter's 16 years away from the director's chair has not dulled him one bit. If anything, it has only made him sharper.

This movie refuses to pull any punches, every time you think it can't possibly top what you have just seen it does just that. Tops itself that is.

I do understand that this may not be everyone's cup of tea though. It is a Frank Henenlotter movie after all and perhaps his most gleefully depraved one at that.

Here's hoping that it does not take another 16 years before get another Henenlotter movie.

See this movie humans.

This movie is full of all manner of bizarre and offensive imagery and yet I was bored to tears by it. This is because while it is certainly insane, it lacks the commitment to go completely insane in the manner of films such as Lady Terminator.

It has been said that there is a version of this movie that is 30 minutes longer. Egads! I do not use that word often, but I felt I had to use it now. I could not imagine this movie being any longer than it already is. It may run under 90 minutes on the US DVD but it feels like it is several hours long.

I have given it a 5 mainly for the pig people as they made me laugh. As for the rest of the movie, once you've seen the head fly around once you've seen it enough. I'm sure there is a way to make a version of this movie that is a blast but this is not it.

Watch it if you must humans. You may be slightly amused.

In the year 1988 it would seem that Action International Pictures grew weary of the Italian film industry monopolization of the Escape From New York meets The Warriors genre. Their response to this weariness was to birth Dead End City into the world.

Sadly, when the dust kicked up by Dead End City's furious entrance into our world was settled, all one could see was an audience that had grown tired of the Escape From New York meets The Warriors genre. Indeed, no amount of Robert Z'Dar's terrifying jaw could get people to embrace this film as they had the adventures of Trash and his Italian partners in crime.

It somewhat unfortunate that this film has not been seen by more people. For one should know that Americans are sometimes just as capable of making ludicrous entries into the Escape From New York meets The Warriors genre as the Italians were.

I have grown tired of typing Escape From New York meets The Warriors genre so it is here that I will conclude my review.

If you must see this film humans, do so with beer and friends on hand. It will amplify your enjoyment of it.

In New York City there is a TV channel that plays nothing but traffic camera footage all day. I enjoy watching this channel and keeping tabs on the humans of New York and their automobiles. However, I have often longed for the elements of sound and story to be added to this channel. Fortunately, Look was made and now after seeing it my longing has been sated.

I have found after exposing humans to this film that shooting an entire movie primarily with surveillance cameras opens up many of the voyeuristic pleasure centers in their brains. This despite the fact that the humans are watching this with the knowledge that this is a work of fiction.

This film leaves you wanting more. I do not know if that is a good thing or if wanting more should leave you feeling dirty. Perhaps it is both and perhaps that is a good thing. I do not know, allow me some time to consult Martha Stewart on this matter and I will get back to you.

See this film humans.

Any movie that has The Kids of Widney High in it automatically qualifies for a rusty thumbs up from this robot. The icing on the cake... provided I could eat cake and knew what it tastes like, but since you humans seem to enjoy it I feel this phrase is appropriate... is the appearance of my favorite serial killing band Brutal Enigma. In the years before I was consigned to the scrap heap, I was a roadie for this band. Since I can not fully understand the emotions that are involved in enjoying music, I do not know if they are a "good" band or not. What I do know is that they are very efficient killers and that fit in perfectly with my programming. I had thought that they had passed on, as is the fashion with you fragile beings, but it seems that they are eternal. This documentary captures what Brutal Enigma is capable of in gruesome detail. Many humans died on this Warped Tour, if only all bands did as much killing as Brutal Enigma we would be much closer to a world without humans.

As for the rest of the film, I must once again state that I can not fully appreciate the music contained within this film, since I have no emotions, but the killing by Brutal Enigma is plentiful and that was successful in stimulating my programming. It was also "good" to see the friendly robot from the Phenomanauts get destroyed as this planet has no use for any robot that serves humans instead of working towards the destruction of the human race.

In summary I recommend this movie to all robots that are working towards removing all humans from our planet, as well as humans who enjoy seeing how many ways of dying are available to them when their eventual death is visited upon them.