nebohr

Both my wife and myself agree that to watch and enjoy this abysmal attempt at "comedy" requires a mindset which we don't possess and cannot attain.

There is no comedy. No plot. No action. This movie is boring. With a capital "b".

Unlikeable characters who are narcissistic, egocentric, self-serving, vain and self-indulgent.

An absolutely terrible production which, apparently, plays well in underdeveloped countries. (At 0:27:26 -the gas water heater with no vent pipe was a dead give-away).

When fellow "reviewers" give a piece of garbage like this a 10-star rating they are NOT being honest. Which means, for what ever motivates them to do so, all they've accomplished is to waste other people's time.

Submitted THURSDAY Nov.30.2023 12:35 Resubmitted SATURDAY Dec.02.2023 20:38.

At one point he refers to himself as: "The Trim Reaper". We both nearly blew wine bubbles out of our noses. It's funny once you hear it in context.

One of the main reasons that both my wife and myself still maintain Netflix as our sole streaming-content provider is because of the many comedic specials they provide.

Now, granted, we were exposed to the fresh material from some of the greatest comedians to have ever lived (while we were still in our childhood): Bruce, Diller, Dangerfield, Carlin, Pryor. Which means that, for the most part, there is nothing original in the universe. We have seen nearly everything that comedy has to offer.

Matt Rife is a funny person. He is always working at "crossing the line"; which is what makes for good comedy.

Resubmitted: Nov.26.2023 10:58.

Science? What's That?

This movie's target audience is for stoners and children. Period.

No one connected with this movie had the slightest idea when it came to understanding either nuclear energy or biology.

Emotions? Anyone do emotions? Both my wife and myself would exchange looks and we were like: "this movie's actors are just as two-dimensional as a cartoon comic book".

Let's not forget the many plot holes. One on top of another on top of another.

What's up with all the strange wipes, anyway. They don't add to the story and are simply annoying. The director adding his "trademark", perhaps?

An overly-long movie, cliched and contrived. And about as polished as the "Barfarama" story which is later told by "Gordie".

The screenplay is simply juvenile, and so obviously written by men who had no idea what it was like to be a boy growing up in Rural America in the 1950's:

The boys my age in my neighborhood weren't drama queens.

The boys my age in my neighborhood weren't sophisticated.

The boys my age in my neighborhood didn't smoke cigarettes.

The boys my age in my neighborhood didn't talk about murdering people.

Quite obviously the boys in the movie were born and raised in Hollywood, California.

Keywords: boring, preposterous, pretentious, unconvincing, unmoving.

No, this is not yet another soppy review written by someone who feels the need to say farewell to River Phoenix who was, after all, in the real world, most well-known for being an out-of-control alcoholic and drug addict.

Both my wife and myself enjoyed this silly little production which is, basically, an indie film about the making an indie film of the "found footage" variety. It is clever, cheesy and has some fantasy elements thrown in.

There is, initially, quite a lot of alcohol consumption along with some drug use and sexual innuendo including a very prolonged lesbian kiss for that extra "zing".

The computer-generated graphics/ special effects were decently rendered; throughout there is a nearly overwhelming amount of "fog", and many times the positions of the smoke generators are quite obvious.

Doesn't every adult know that the Oscar statues are phallic symbols.

The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar:

Both my wife and myself agree that this is a rather clever production; what with the breaking of the fourth wall and all of the varied odd characters, along their varied, odd stories; the way that they were presented (and we have not read any of the books, nor do we anticipate doing so) and how situations were presented.

The semi-Tim Burtonesque sets and colors certainly added to the production value but: Unfortunately, we both found the storyline running dry at about the half-way point and we both went for another glass of wine.

This production (in both the opinion of my wife and myself) would have benefitted by a rewrite with character depth included.

In our title box we use the description "light-hearted nonsense" because the movie is just so chocked full of plot holes, contradictions, and, yes, the basic premise is, in our humble opinions, general nonsense.

Please, don't get the wrong idea here; both my wife and myself enjoyed "The Giver". For the most part the story flowed smoothly, the scenery was often times magnificent; just barely reeking of being computer generated imagery. The actors performed their parts well. It's just that there are simply too many implausible actions, situations and statements to be ignored.

Just one example and we are done: how do people know the names of colors if they've never seen colors?

Not Funny, To The Point Of Cringeworthiness.

Surprise! Every movie is Jim Carrey's worst. Just like picking out your favorite turd in the toilet bowl.

This movie wasn't funny, and it just went on and on and on and not once did either my wife or myself laugh. Not once.

This movie made me realize that Jim Carrey is so pathetically untalented and annoying that he could (and has) ruined every movie that he's ever been in.

To give credit where credit is due: Jim Carrey has invented a new comedy sub-genre: annoying, obnoxious, uncomfortable and vile comedy.

Our rating includes minus two stars for Jim Carrey. Goes unsaid.

Also, minus one star for Jack Black. Also goes unsaid.

Want to know the funniest part of "The Cable Guy"? HAH fooled you.

Interpersonal relationships should always be treasured. And they might save your life!

This is a beautiful, wonderful movie that works on so many levels.

Oh: boo, hoo, hoo some might say. It's not the Swedish original.

Well, guess what!? This has Tom Hanks!

So, some of you would probably also think: Oh boo, hoo, hoo.

This painting of a cat is not the original? No, you don't. Art is art, people.

There is a lot of emotion, darkness and truth in this story.

Both my wife and myself think that this is Tom Hanks' greatest movie, making Forrest Gump his second greatest.

A guy who loves cats can't be all bad, right?

Irrational. Unoriginal. Pathetically slow. Cliché riddled. Shoddy. Boring. The absolutely worst road-trip type production that either my wife or myself have ever watched.

Most movies begin directly after the opening credits, right? Well, "End of the Road" really seems like it never got started. Almost an hour and one half of absolutely nothing happening. This production is listed under the "action" genre? Somebody is very mistaken.

Do yourself a favor and go watch paint dry, instead of watching this.

There are never more than two cars on a stretch of highway.

The police can never quite do their jobs.

The show is very well written, the characters are well-developed.

Fun, quirky musical score which is heavy on the cello, along with other woodwinds.

Glad to see Michael McKean back on the job. This time he plays US President Rayburn.

Both my wife and myself laughed out loud several times at the occasional humorous line; sometimes oddly phrased. Sometimes it's something completely unexpected, totally out of left field; to use American slang. You the viewer may want to turn on the closed captioning so as not to miss out.

Quite a few splendid views of London. Such a magnificent city. Such a magnificent people. And quite polite.

Quite the surprise ending.

A very slow moving production. Both uninspired and uninspiring. Featuring a father who is too stupid, stubborn and prideful to do right by his wife and child.

How can one human being make so many bad decisions in such a short amount of time?

Trying to sell an over-priced medical device for a living equals looser. Also, there can't possibly be enough hospitals that would require such a machine for a salesman to make a decent living. He says he has to sell three a month!

Does anyone know what Chris and Linda Gardner were doing with their money?

Minus one star for Will Smith because of "The Slap Heard Around The World". And minus one star for any of his family members. (Jaden Smith).

How does the homeless guy continually steal a scanner?

The Wretched (2019)

Both my wife and myself agree that this is a pretty decent c-grade endeavor with mainly, overall, both good acting and story. The few necessary special effects, while not spectacular, are good enough to serve their intended purposes.

Good atmosphere. There are a couple good creepy parts that will keep you smiling.

But yes, the story can be a bit confusing, in our opinions, simply because of the fact that the general viewing audience (ourselves included) hasn't seen enough of the actors to be able to instantly recognize them; unlike, say, a Sharon Stone or an Arnold Schwarzenegger.

This is a sequel to the movie "Olympus Has Fallen". A cheesy but fun B grade movie where you don't have to think too much, where you know before it begins how it will end.

The computer graphics are fairly poor, for a movie which was released in 2016.

The movie begins as a sort of reminiscence of the Waco massacre, which occurred in the US back in 1993.

The scenes around 0:05:41 reminded both my wife and myself of poor Clint Eastwood in Dirty Harry (1971) (as "Dirty" Harry Callahan); running for miles alongside the US President's limousine. Ya feel lucky, punk!?

The British -MI6, Scotland Yard and pretty much everybody else -come across as dunces.

Berlin Syndrome (2017)

A rather slow-to-develop production; but if the reviewer sticks with it then they might find that the one hour fifty-six minute run-time is not overly excessive.

Initially, both my wife and myself watched this production with open minds. Then, when it became painfully clear to us that the lead character, "Clare", had absolutely zero survival instincts we began to lose heart. My wife has been "empowered" nearly her whole life, and I thank both of her parents for her attitude.

Over our breakfast we discussed what it was we had seen, so far, and suddenly my wife blurts out: "Stockholm syndrome"! And I was like: "Yes"! "Perfect"! (Research it).

But then: another act begins and it seems like Clare has developed a spine.

Incarnate (2016)

It's all just a bad dream. Or is it?

Decent acting and directing. And story was just so clever. But the "explainations" do not make any logical sense. Why don't the police get involved in any of the murders? How can someone get into someone else's dream? How do they have the exact same dream?

How is it that you can carry real physical items into your own dream state and then hand them over to someone else in your /their dream? How can you punch someone in your /their dream?

Both my wife and myself are happy that this production was made.

Reviewers: watch it till the end. You'll be glad that you did.

Episode #S.1 E.2

Decent enough soundtrack.

This involves a creepy mother /clueless daughter cult family. For some unknown reason they are both running from the law. Mom is always reminding daughter Bambi that she wants the two of them to "fly under the radar"; yet mom does everything humanly possible to bring attention to the both of them. The mother, Melisa, has that dark and aloof Morticia Addams persona but with added aggressive paranoia while the daughter, Bambi, comes across as a clueless, over-grown child.

Begins as though it's going to be structured much like a documentary. A few tiny peeps more into the family's backstory.

My wife lost her hearing because of a pyro malfunction during a "rock and roll" concert back in the 1980's, so she relies on the American English closed-captioning.

Black crows are harbingers of death.

The writers bring out a point that is often overlooked: if a person and their friends form an opinion, however invalid, they tend to share it amongst their "peers".

Episode #S.1 E.1.

Decent enough soundtrack. Very little backstory.

A creepy mother /clueless daughter cult family. For some unknown reason they are both running from the law. Mom is always reminding daughter Bambi that she wants the two of them to "fly under the radar"; yet mom does everything humanly possible to bring attention to the both of them.

The mother, Melisa, has that dark and aloof Morticia Addams persona but with added aggressive paranoia while the daughter, Bambi, comes across as a clueless, over-grown child.

The three women "stalkers" at the hotel are both creepy and obnoxious.

Well. "Agent Elvis" is certainly unique. Both my wife and myself think that this is a "niche" production. But we are both wondering: aimed at just what audience? We barely got through the first episode and, honestly, we don't see ourselves returning for any more.

To anyone out there who is younger than 60 years old: Elvis Presley was the White guy who helped bring Black music into the mainstream.

There are a few semi-obscure references like the "Blue Hawaii" tee shirt. "Blue Hawaii" was a romantic comedy /musical from the early 1960's which starred Elvis. And, also, he did like to shoot things at random; such as televisions.

PBS has some interesting information if you care to take a look.

Why believe researchers? Academia? Or, for that matter, thousands of years of human experiences; when you can believe hateful, paraniod criminals like Richard Nixon?

If the viewers were paying attention to this beautiful documentary then they learned that mushrooms are not only pretty much the bedrock of all living things on this poor, sick planet of ours but that fungi, if given the chance, can help neutralize all the damage caused by ignorant homo-sapiens over the past few centuries.

Plus: they have remarkable healing properties when consumed by those same homo-sapiens. And they taste good!

Fungi also have other benefits.

It's not like both my wife and myself (and the majority of our family and friends) were teenagers in the 1960's and, unlike uptight, paranoid and ignorant "adults" we experienced life in ways that they could not even begin to imagine.

Heroes (1977)

A terrible movie. Bland, forgettable nonsense. One half hour of content (I'm being generous) stretched to the breaking point; being nearly two hours in length.

Henry Winkler's character, Jack Dunne, is immature and obnoxious.

Sally Field's character, Carol Bell, is one dimensional. Harrison Ford's character, Kenny Boyd, plays like one of the dumb hicks from the Dukes of Hazzard. Neither my wife nor myself could develop any sense of empathy towards any of the characters.

There's some very low-key humor thrown in here and there. For whatever reason.

At 0:55:42 -Kenny fires many more bullets than what the magazine could hold.

At 0:47:05 -Kenny claims that his car has a "blower" (a supercharger) but at 0:57:28 there is no supercharger on the engine.

SUBMITTED THURSDAY 03.16.2023 12:15.

Boring, utter nonsense.

The great William Shakespeare once wrote a play titled: "Much Ado About Nothing". Now, if one were to change that to read: "Little Ado About Nothing" then that would pretty much summarize this production.

A riveting story? No. Any explanation given for any of the characters to do any of the things that they do? No.

Were we able to identify with or have empathy for any of the characters? Again, no.

Why is the electricity shut off to the police station, alone?

Apparently, in the Republic of the Philippines, police stations have no telephones.

A single bird is more important than a bus load of missing human beings.

The guy's name is right there on his uniform.

National animal? Or national bird. It's too much for the poor police chief to remember!

SUBMITTED WEDNESDAY 03.15.2023 22:27.

U-Turn is a B-movie of the thriller/ suspense/ horror genre.

Decent acting with, what seems to be basically rudderless direction.

Both my wife and myself very rarely watch anything Asian; since their culture is so hard to relate to; being so vastly different from that of the West.

Inconsistent English dubbing, along with inconsistent English closed-captioning. Additionally, it's hard to both take in the scenes and read the CC because of the poor pacing.

Decent special effects.

Hollywood cliché #194: there will be an unruly crowd at a crime scene minutes after the police first arrive.

A crime scene tape perimeter is to ignored.

It is perfectly acceptable to steal from the dead because, like, what are they going to do about it?

In a Western country Donna would have been arrested. Several times.

Too Much Sado-Masochism Torture.

Luther: The Fallen Sun (2023)

We've not seen any of the television shows. And, honestly, we don't plan to.

A borderline acceptable production, both my wife and myself are in agreement. But we will NEVER watch it again, because of the sick, perverted, sado-machochism. Like: What is this? The Spanish inquisition?

Some suspense to keep the viewers guessing; as far as what is in store for the characters. Good acting, overall. Not much in the way of action sequences or gunplay; which is just fine by us. (Not all Americans are in need of that kind of entertainment, by the way).

Neon Lights (2022)

A rather lack-luster production which tries hard to be a horror/ thriller movie but does not succeed. A weak "who-done-it" story, besides. So we don't find fault with the actors. Sometimes a job is, simply, a job.

Both my wife and myself have some respect for Kim Coates; as an actor. My wife absolutely adores his piercing green eyes. Mister Coates, dude: why don't you do a period piece like: "The Pale Blue Eye"?

We were unable to connect emotionally with any of the characters nor did we ever get a feeling of suspense.

DO NOT be dragging a bloody axe across my clean wood floor!