mch-24

Hammer's adaptation of Haggard's 1887 novel "She" looks promising on paper. An exemplary cast, starring Hammer heavyweights Peter Cushing, Christopher Lee, and John Richardson, alongside comedy actor Bernard Cribbins, the beautiful (but entirely wooden) Ursula Andress, featuring exotic locales, adventure, comedy, romance and action. Unfortunately the film fails in almost every aspect.

Archaeologist Holly (Cushing), his valet Job (Cribbins) and close friend Leo (Richardson) are soaking up the ambiance of Palestine, when they are approached by Ustane (the strikingly beautiful Rosenda Monteros). It is revealed that Leo is the double of a long-dead High-Priest of an ancient civilisation. Armed with a map our 3 adventurers set course for the ancient city of Kuma, which they find is ruled by the immortal Ayesha (Andress). Ayesha is convinced Leo is the reincarnation of her love from 2000 years ago and tries to persuade him to accept immortality to rule by her side.

Despite the future credentials of the main players, the script is one of the worst I have ever heard, and the actors all struggle to rescue meaningful performances from it. Dialogue is predictable, cliché and at times grindingly repetitive, with the possible exception of the light-hearted comic relief brought to proceedings by Bernard Cribbins. After a promising beginning, our adventurers set off for Kuma, at which point the plot slowly plods along and only really picks up again in the final scene. Along the way there are a couple of action scenes, some romance, and some supernatural elements, but they are all done so half-heartedly they might as well have never happened, and do nothing to break the pace of the sluggish plot, leaving it dull and flat.

The film is not without a few redeeming qualities though. It was one of Hammer's most expensive films, and in a rare move for the studio, exterior shots were done on-location in Israel, giving the film an epic feel not typical for Hammer. Production design varies wildly but it has a few moments of true beauty underlined by generally excellent cinematography of exotic locales and desert wilderness. The cinematography gives the film a scope that manages to make the film feel bigger than it actually is. Also, despite the lumbering pace of the bulk of the film, the last 20 minutes turns out to be a fairly exciting, if predictable, climax. Seeing Cushing and Lee in a scene together is always exhilarating too, even if it is underpinned by awkward, hammy dialogue.

Overall "She" is a bit of a muddled film that doesn't quite know where it belongs. It has elements of adventure, horror, romance and action, but ultimately doesn't do enough to succeed at any of them, and this is hampered further by the largely terrible dialogue. Despite high production values for a Hammer film, this is overall a disappointment and for hardened Hammer completionists only.

One thing that newcomers to Hammer need to appreciate is that many of their films are low-budget, and kitsch, and One Million Years B.C scores high on the cheese-factor even by Hammer's yardstick. The film's tagline is laughably off-target – "This is the way it was!" – I am almost positive cavewomen didn't have immaculately coiffured hair, push-up loincloth bras, eyeliner, and waxed legs, while their primitive menfolk did battle with dinosaurs that scientifically speaking died out many millions of years earlier. Needless to say, a willing suspension of disbelief is a prerequisite to enjoyment of this movie.

Inappropriate marketing aside, if you can get past these hurdles, B.C is an entertaining, if mindless, action movie, and one which is elevated to ongoing cult status thanks to 2 main factors - Raquel Welch and Ray Harryhausen.

Even if you have never heard of this film, chances are at some point you have been exposed to "that picture". Raquel Welch is THE reason this film's cult following is 95% male, and seeing her in her loincloth bikini is quite honestly a sight to behold. Fleeing from giant dinosaurs, and fighting with cavewomen, this role in a low-budget British monster movie is the one that put her on the map and created one of the greatest sex symbols ever to light up the silver screen.

Only just losing out to Raquel Welch as the star of the show, are the creatures themselves. Animated by the inimitable, legendary Ray Harryhausen (as far as I know the only special effects guru to become a household name in his own right) the creatures are brilliantly realised, and integrated seamlessly with the live-action elements. Aside from Jason and the Argonauts, and Clash of the Titans, this is some of his best work – the Allosaur attack on the shell-people's village being a real technical accomplishment and highlight of the film. The results are slightly marred though by the the integration of real animals, shot and superimposed to look massive. An early attack from a giant, half-asleep looking iguana is hardly menacing, nor is a (thankfully very brief) appearance by a gigantic tarantula that is trying to eat an equally gigantic cricket. These negative moments are forgotten though when Harryhausen's flawless stop-motion takes center stage, bringing us the iconic triceratops fight amongst other great set-pieces.

Thanks to the jaw-dropping "talents" of Raquel Welch, the rest of the cast are pretty expendable. Even main star John Richardson's character of Tumak could have been played by a monkey in a spacesuit when Welch was on screen, no-one would have noticed. Everyone plays as well as they need to though, given the grunt-riddled, running-away-from-an-imaginary-monster screenplay. The storyline is simplistic, (primitive man learns tolerance and civility) and is basically a thinly veiled cover for a series of awesome action set-pieces and monster vs human battle sequences, and a vehicle for the scantily clad Raquel Welch to run around getting sweaty and dirty, which can only be considered a bonus.

In summary, leave your brain at the door and you are likely to have a great time. This is a cult classic; a camp, entertaining showcase for Harryhausen's skills, and while shallow, has enough action and sex-appeal to please the average testosterone-laden viewer. Worth watching for Raquel Welch's magnetic presence alone.