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Reviews

Alison's Birthday
(1981)

Everythings good besides the script
I thought the acting was great specially for the decade in which sometimes the delivery was intentionally bad, in this case the lead male character did great, honestly all the actors did great, the photography worked, editing worked, practial fx specially the opening were good.

My issue was the fact that the lead female dissapears halfway, there is no suspense since she just doesnt do anything ever, the male takes over the protagonist role, she never takes her dead fathers warning seriously it almost felt like a plot hole, the whole movie feels avoidable af, the whole situation shoeforced. I feel that the writer knew how to end the story but now how to get there, so as iconic as it coulda been it lacked the suspense that other films had. (Cough cough Rosemarys Baby)

Brivido giallo: Una notte nel cimitero
(1987)
Episode 1, Season 1

Absurdly Love this Film
Ive seen a lot of giallos, even the most famous ones follow the same structure, while the generic ones dont even follow a main character properly and its just random killling and we find the protagonist at min 40.

This is one of the only originall giallo supernatural inspired original films.

This might be the only film of the decade were no character dies, I found that amazing, it entertained me enough, I spent enough time with the characters to care for them (unlike every single other giallo/horror from italy) and I loved the happy ending, my only critique is thst the reaper shouldnt have died with a stab lol, but at the same time it made it even funnier.

Nope
(2022)

It looks pretty
Great Cinematography is a subtle insult, the movie is so boring that even casual moviegoers can stop and stare at the beauty of some of the shots, you just have too much time in your hands with a story that doesn´t pull you in.

In my opinion obviously.

I think that the movie was filled with too many themes and metaphors that were forced into one story but they didnt meld together, it felt uncomfortable narrative wise.

I wish it was a more simple story, a creature feature like the last 20 mins or so, with only one topic, some of the ¨metaphors¨ were so on point, like he was attempting sarcasm which would be fine if the whole tone was the same but it kept changing.

The best way to view this movie is as an outright comedy (not an actual offense but maybe he was aiming at that)

The Flash: The Curious Case of Bartholomew Allen
(2022)
Episode 16, Season 8

Not terrible But reminds me why I stopped
The episode is average. At lesst theres a concept as opposed to all over the place as most eps this season.

That being said the ending was beyond cringy. Stopping Frosts resurrection was beyond forced. It made no sense, but beyond that it reminded me why I stopped watching the show for a couple of seasons.

The flash as a character I hate it, Barry Allen in this show is written in a way in which he faces no consequences for his hipocrisy, he is allowed to screw it up and literally kill other peoples family members while trying to resurrect his own, but whenever one of his friends tries to do the same he comes in yelling YOUVE GOT TO LEARN TO LET GO LIKE I DID 1 EPISODE AGO. And then he does the same next season, it became a hipocrisy loop. I hated the protagonist and this episode reminded me why, most people hate Iris becos idk misogyny? I dont mind Iris existing, can't stand the cringy protagonist. I used to like Flash during the first couple of seasons before he destroyed lives for his own hedonism and faced 0 consequences.

Dune
(2021)

The Emperors New Clothes
For anyone non familiar with the tale: A scammer gave the emperor new clothes that could only be seen by "special" people, so even tho the emperor was naked, everyone clapped in order to seem "special" until a kid yelled and laughed "the emperor is naked "

Dune is a mediocre film. The first two hours are great, the third hour is a shameless 45 minute commercial. Character Development? Who dat? The shot of the protagonist with his face superimposed in the most terrible attempt at VFX in recent film history, I cant believe they allowed that to be in the final cut. It ruins an otherwise technically flawless movie.

Without the second half of the story, Dune part 1 is white savior Incel propaganda, there is no way around it, there just isnt, and knowing they weren't sure there would be a second part where theyd tackle that... I believe it has a good rating simply becos most people who enjoy it are racists. Completely unable to have an an opinion of the film itself, but on how the whites are the privileged saviors who will lead the brown sand n... people... into victory. Without the second part "that is the story", that is the content of this film, no one cares if you read the books, we talk about this particular film. But it's biggest sin was simply not ending at the 2 hour mark, there was absurdly nothing relevant or entertaining after.

Eternals
(2021)

Why did they want to do this? I am very surprised
I think the movie is a safe 8, I particularly loved it cos I already expect a linear 3 act structure with no surprises from any marvel movie that has ever existed. The Eternals in that matter is the first one I found somewhat hard to predict.

It is easily one of the hardest movies to direct, is up there with Watchmen or the dissapointing Dune.

I dont get who the target audience here is. Young adults that grew with Marvel but are done with the childish plots?

The most important part for me is that it opened the door for a Lovecraft adaptation with an outer god, the window was already open, but now is a wide door. In my opinion, The Eternals: is a cosmic horror story thats almost impossible to tell juggling 10 characters in 2 and a half hours with massive representation that feels organic af.

Eternals
(2021)

Why did they want to do this? I am very surprised
I think the movie is a safe 8, I particularly loved it cos I already expect a linear 3 act structure with no surprises from any marvel movie that has ever existed. The Eternals in that matter is the first one I found somewhat hard to predict.

It is easily one of the hardest movies to direct, is up there with Watchmen or the dissapointing Dune.

I dont get who the target audience here is. Young adults that grew with Marvel but are done with the childish plots?

The most important part for me is that it opened the door for a Lovecraft adaptation with an outer god, the window was already open, but now is a wide door. In my opinion, The Eternals: is a cosmic horror story thats almost impossible to tell juggling 10 characters in 2 and a half hours with massive representation that feels organic af.

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina: Chapter Thirty-Six: At the Mountains of Madness
(2020)
Episode 8, Season 4

The three is for effort
The writing was beyond awful, they forced all of the story arcs, everything was convoluted, they also promised something they couldnt deliver ¨The Cosmic¨ they didnt even ATTEMPT to deliver... The ending was also awful, there was no technique to arrive where they wanted, the shoeforced the whole thing into a big mess. I like to keep the ending of the second season as the ending to the show; the tone went too dark afterwards and they simply didnt deliver or where ready for it, stop doing Lovecraft unless you mean it, you cannot have melodramatic Lovecraft, go big or go home. In the case of Sabrina I wish they had stayed home, was a great small feel good show.

The Flash: Girls Night Out
(2017)
Episode 5, Season 4

Is this a DC fans virus?
Are DC fans standard mysoginists? The episode was ok, there was no reason to rage or hate. The flash Is a mediocre show From a Storytelling point of View (if anyone actually studied script writting), only dumb-os would think this Is a writing masterclass, so, there Is no reason to hate on this normal episode unless you need therapy.

Supergirl: Far from the Tree
(2017)
Episode 3, Season 3

The Best out of all the DC shows
The show balances melodrama with action, on one hand we get The introduction of the Martian war, I am surprised they get away with showing so many CGI alien fights in a TV show, besides Legends of Tomorrow this Is the most expensive looking of the Arrowverse, on the other hand we get The standard homophobic parent Story, It Is kind of cliché but well executed, imo the speech could of been More aggresive and less empathic, but, this Is the shows nature. Now that I see the other reviews It seems like these stories need to be told More often. Ive been binge watching all DC shows AND this Is easily The most cleanly written aND Tryhard. I dislike tryhards in gaming but not in TV show writing. Of Course this show Is not suitable for homophobes, racists or mysoginist, but neither Is the World anymore, this seems to be the biggest complain about the show. It Is awkward.

Arrow: Lian Yu
(2017)
Episode 23, Season 5

You cant shoot arrows ay people's arms?
Most of the Time the plot of this show could be easily avoided by shooting non letal arrows, in this case, you just showed me the Arrow shooting at the villain's knee. Couldnt he shoot at his arms? I Guess that the rest of the episode was so well done people were too invested to facepalm, most of the season was weak, the villain was too weak I thought It would be solved mid season, specially since the identity of Prometheus was Beyond obvious, the issue Is that Oliver Is plain dumb, a Himbo. DC shows are better at most of the stuff Marvel gets wrong at the movies, but, Baron Zemo > Prometheus. Go for Brute Force not "smart" villain's.

How to Get Away with Murder: Stay
(2020)
Episode 15, Season 6

Beautiful masterpiece.
After all the killing, recklessness, cruelty, cynicism. It bared its heart and soul at the stand and left me speechless. It ended un a Melodramatic, real, suspensful, fair way.

They did surprise me, but the show no longer seemed to care about the plot twists that Made It famous, It focused on telling us this Story, about a brilliant, broken, survivor. I was left in awe and traes.

Crawl
(2019)

Great Storytelling
If I wanted to hate on the movie I would quickly search wikipedia AND become a crocodile experto, which I wont. As far as a Film goes, as far as telling a Story, It Is simply too clean. Plot holes? All the ones pointed at in other reviews seem to be From internacional crocodile experts, this Is a Film of fiction, not a documentary, It avoided plenty of old clichés, the last frame Is great, the suspense Is well handled, the rating Is pretty high for a Summer crocodile movie. Finds a way to have clean character uncomplicated arcs.

The Twilight Zone: Blurryman
(2019)
Episode 10, Season 1

Bigotry made a lot of Accounts to Review this show.
Everyone is so obssesed with it being PC or not, they simply are unable to have an opinion for themselves, it has to be all black or white, republican or liberal. Pretty much none of the reviewers in here are able to separate this, the episode was confusing in a bad way, the ending was overly ambiguous, overwritten, too much dialogue trying to explain the philosophy behind it instead of showing us. But, it has nothing to do with political correctness or not, the ¨Not all men¨ episode is one of the most solid ones narratively and yet is the lowest score in here. They got big shoes to fill, thats what I understood from this episode and that is fine, i hope they do this better on the next attempt, 40 mins episodes are a no go for me. Go back to telling your story in 23 minutes.

The Twilight Zone: Replay
(2019)
Episode 3, Season 1

The first one that felt like Twilight Zone
The only reason this one Is rated lower Is because It makes people uncomfortable. But It was the first good one ir the bunch, the only one that had some aesthetic different enough yo make It the Twilight Zone. The ending was brilliant AND It Is the only one with suspense. Solid transgresion.

Revenge of the Lost
(2017)

Warning
It Is a very low quality Film, I thought It was a comedy, but It actually tries, It should of gone full satire. There are way too Many amateur first Time filmmakers without distribution out there AND this Gets Amazon prime? The audio was the one thing I couldnt stand, the levels kept jumping. I am all down for terrible acting, AND terrible vfx. That didint matter. I could not finish It. The music was too forced, just make It a Damm comedy. Wasted oportunity.

BoJack Horseman: Nice While It Lasted
(2020)
Episode 16, Season 6

Cute, lazy, historical probably, brilliant probably.
It went out in a dark night time happy go lucky way, which is brilliant but it left me with such a need for more, I wante to see more sunshine, I wanted to see the colors of the city, I wanted closure, I wanted many things.

It left me feeling alone, I think it is an ending that makes you crave for company and people, it makes you crave for something. In that way is brilliant.

6 Underground
(2019)

Interesting.
I am shocked at the hate M. Bay receives considering he Is one of a kind director. I do think that the editing Is really hard to follow and I expected that, but I got used to It midway. The story Is pretty simple, It feels like It was written by a child or teenager who wants to be a filmmaker, before going to school, get His script destroyed and start writing pretentious stuff. I am glad this Film exists, It has soul. The characters save most of the film, they are way too Many and somewhat unidimensional but I think the movie finds a way by the end to give them subtle Depth. I disliked the main characters Arc ending, way too ambiguous asking for a sequel, I think this would of worked better as a TV show but It would take away From the childish mess Bay does AND which I truly love. There are two instances of crazyy meta. Oddly enough I think It passes the Bechdel test.

Pose: Never Knew Love Like This Before
(2019)
Episode 4, Season 2

Art.
This episode puts plenty of movies to shame, sorry not sorry. First of it all, it manages to bring hope out of a tragedy in a seamlessly manner, the acting is so subtle yet flawless, the exchange between Miss Candy and her parents is one story I had not heard before, specially not with such class and in a big tv show. I am so used to trans characters being portrayed as hookers who get killed and the main character fights for justice, but the trans character is so irrelevant and only a victim sometimes without even a line of dialogue. This is the most brilliant show at this moment, sure, sometimes the scripts could be polished just a tiny bit more in my opinion, but not this one, this was a flawless victory for everyone, there should be a Criterion Collection category for T.V shows.

No Good Nick: The Italian Job
(2019)
Episode 5, Season 2

This is when it becomes brilliant
I kept watching because the sitcom format makes it enjoyable even tho some episodes where hard to believe. This episode made it all worthy and it stays solid until the end, great show.

No Good Nick: The Charity Mugger
(2019)
Episode 7, Season 1

Jump the Shark too fast
I get that the premise itself jumps the shark but, this one episode was over the top unbelievable, I just could not believe it at all.

Swiped
(2018)

Unable to relate to any character.
I thought the characters were very unrealistic, I couldn't like any of them, I am a sucker for the visuals of generic low budget college movies so if I stopped watching something must be really wrong.

Black Mirror: Rachel, Jack and Ashley Too
(2019)
Episode 3, Season 5

Its an ok episode
People who give this a lower rating than Metalhead are the definition of insanity.

I thought it was entertaining, most of black mirror feels forced, this one feels fine,the pacing is one of the greatest in all of black mirror.

Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt: Sliding Van Doors
(2019)
Episode 9, Season 4

Beautiful and strangely creepy.
After so long of knowing and loving these characters, watching this episode was one of the most beautiful experiences I've had. The show gives you so much hope on how the decisiones you have made throughout your life may be imperfect but is how you are still still alive after all this time, the ending was sooooo subtly creepy, at the beginning Kimmy attacks a package delivery guy because of her PTSD the delivery guy ends up being a serial killer who admits he was about to butcher them. The show ends with Kimmy and Titus getting married? after taking decisions that were apparently the most perfect ones, and yet, because Kimmy does not have PTSD now, the same serial killer enters their condo and closes the door behind ready to butcher them as they celebrate being together after taking great decisions that led them to this moment. It made me cherish my own personal suffering, my own pain, maybe that is what has kept me alive, who knows?

Yeom-lyeok
(2018)

No character arc for the protagonist, tries to force you to like him with score
Downplays it's best character trying to give protagonism to it's main character that is one of the most unreleatable protagonistsI have seen in a film, it worked in Train to Busan because it's main character's flaw was treated seriously unlike Psychokynesis which shows a terrible trait and a terrible person while playing quirky funny music trying to make us like him. The other thing that really bothered me is that the female character was downplayed so bad, it was easily it's best character and also she seemed like the protagonist who's role was stolen to give it to a man, it works in Train to Buscan again... Because the women depicted in that picture were weaker for good reasons, a pregnant woman, a child and a couple of old people. In the film it feels like everyone is trying to force her to like his father in the most convoluted and incredible ways, and when I say incredible I mean I do not believe them and it ruins movie magic.

It is as big of a dissappointment as it's main character, it would of been better if the writers had read the book "Save the Cat" or if the director was Milo's Forman's who's Amadeus is a great example on how to make a terrible person into a great character, in this case it simply doesn't work to anyone who doesn't feel guilty for leaving his wife and kid for 10 years and coming back demanding respect that is actually given to them pretty fast and applauded.

The photography is decent but not anything special, production design is pretty clean and it seems like they had a big budget for this one with all the extras in police costumes. The acting has it's ups and downs the one that shines is the villain that is only seen for a couple of scenes. All in all it is a very underwhelming film considering it comes from South Korea which tends to have close to flawless execution on it's widely distributed films.

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