clarkedwardobrien

IMDb member since September 2007
    Lifetime Total
    5+
    IMDb Member
    13 years

Reviews

Irate Gamer Neo: Brutal Legend, Tekken 6, & TMNT in Time
(2010)
Episode 5, Season 3

Proof positive this guy is lazy and doesn't know or care about games.
Im just going to write a short review of this episode because its so damn infamous.

He reviews Tekken 6 and thinks the tacked on side scroller is the main game. How can anyone be that stupid? Tekken is a one on one fighting game,to not know this you would have to have never heard of Tekken. Im not a fan of the series, had an N64 during its formative years as a franchise and I know this. Chris Bores doesn't check facts, doesn't research his subject and apparently doesn't even pay attention to the title screen long enough to even understand what it is he is playing. Gotgame.com should be embarrassed to have somebody like Chris Bores on their site let alone representing them at a show like E3.

Hard Candy
(2005)

Pretty much how you would expect it.
This film does have some good acting, so whats my problem? Once the roles have been established this film runs exactly how you think it will. Predator becomes prey, the bad man gets punished,blah blah blah. The only thing this movies tries to do is get you to sympathise with a child molester, so when its revealed he was definitely involved in the murder of a little girl you feel like its clever twist. I think the main let down of this film is the lack of character development of the young girl, fine the guys evil but she never really explains how she has become the "Dr. Phibes" of the Chris Hansen generation. In closing this film isn't that great, it has some alright acting but the story is really being carried by edgy subject material.

Hellboy II: The Golden Army
(2008)

Fightining with a locker > Plot
I just don't get why this is considered to be better than the first movie. While the first one was understated this movie was just a load of weak jokes and elements ripped from other movies.

The drunk singing was amusing but, as no development had been put into Abe and the princesses attraction, was pointless. Why did The main antagonist have so little presence? Why did they suddenly get mad at Manning who had done nothing but try and pacify them? Why did Krauss turn around and insult Manning at the end for no reason? Why was the giant terrifying monster that was so feared get dispatched by a single shot to the head? Why did nobody question the dangers of Liz carrying Hellboys baby? If Nuala was willing to die to stop her brother why didn't she try to stop him in at the elrond council thing at the start (If the characters had more time to develop they could probably explained this but they didn't)? There's so many plot holes in this film that Im convinced that there is a better movie lying on the cutting room floor,but why keep in character or plot development in when you can have Hellboy get into a slapstick fight with a possessed locker?

Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus
(2009)

Anyone who says "so bad its good" is a liar
"So bad its good" how bad does a film have to be to just be "so bad I wish I hadn't seen it"? Why do we have to give con artists like Uwe Boll or the people at Asylum a loophole to spend as little time on a movie as possible? The dialogue is bad because they didn't spend time writing it. The acting is bad because they hired the cheapest actors and gave them minimal rehearsal time. The CGI is poor because they didn't work on it that much. The octopus appears for a matter of minutes (there is a point when an attack by the octopus is only mentioned by a report given to the main characters) and the sharks appearances are 90% reused footage of it swimming at the camera. Most B-movies are bad but they try to get the most out of what little they have often leading to hokey or silly moments but at least they tried. This film is cheap and lazy all of the "great" moments are in the trailer. Some people may say "this films suppose to be bad" but this isn't some great satire of the B movie its just a B movie that isn't very good. They tried to do as little as possible and passed it off under the banner of "So bad its good". Do yourself a favour watch a Godzilla movie its got Monsters in it and they're actually visible.

Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li
(2009)

Remember when movies wanted to draw you in?
I think some directors these days lack the imagination to create a fantastical world that draws people in. This "Its got to be realistic" view of movies has been created so they don't have to put any depth into a setting that people aren't used to. I am a fan of the Street Fighter series so I know a lot of the stuff in the games wouldn't work in real life, but if the settings and story are good enough I'll happily suspend any disbelief and invest myself for a few hours entertainment.

Lets face it a guy who wears a gaudy military outfit as his fighting garb isn't any more bizarre then that whole pregnant sacrifice madness that went on in this attempt at a movie.

At the end of the day a real movie about street fighting would involve two or more drunk idiots trying to smash broken pint glasses into each others faces. If this franchise ever gets another chance go big and colourful just cos somethings a bit out over the top doesn't mean it cant have a soul It just takes some imagination and effort.

Seth MacFarlane's Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy
(2008)

Meh
This is a dumping ground for the non-sequitur gags that fail to make it into the final scripts for Family Guy before every sketch just read the title and picture Peter saying "That's nearly as weird as (insert title)".Why does Seth think animals acting like people is funny enough as a joke to stand on its own? The Ducks watching meet the parents is a good example them being Ducks doesn't make the dialogue funny your just expected to laugh because its ducks (how ceraazy). Oh and the Bob Marley police interrogation is probably the most obvious boring joke I've ever seen told in a non ironic fashion.

In closing its dull, repetitive and pretty much makes me question how much Seth Macfarlane is responsible for the truly funny moments of American Dad and earlier episodes of Family Guy.

The Irate Gamer
(2007)

I think I've heard this somewhere before.
How does Chris Bores sleep at night? There are a lot of games review shows on the net these days and as you would expect there is a lot of repetition of content what with people reviewing the same games and what have you but I invite you to watch the Irate Gamers review of TMNT for the NES then watch the earlier review of the same game by the Angry Video Game Nerd. Bores parrots every point in the similar but less amusing phonier sounding outraged style he even repeats slightly altered versions of AVGN's creative foul mouthed exclamations. All in all he's not the worst reviewer on the net but I find it reprehensible that he found a popular pundits work and seems to have copied it. It might be a coincidence but it would be a pretty odd one

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