alvarhaggis Reviews (22)

The Book of Boba Fett (2021–2022)

Wrong in so many ways

[4/10 · 15 January 2022]

Spoilers Ahead!

The show gets almost everything wrong. We start with Boba himself. This is Boba shortly after we see him in the Mandalorian. He was Badass in that show. Sinister and dangerous, yet a man with honour, with a code of respect. The last action we see of him in the Mandalorian was killing Bib Fortuna in cold blood and assuming his throne.

Skip forward to this show, seemingly immediately after that scene, and it's a different character. Completely different. Right down to the way he's previously spoken. The helmet is never on, and to be honest that kinda makes him not feel so much Boba Fett. It's a completely new character to both look at, and listen to. This is jarring.

Next is dialogue. It's very off. This is especially noticeable in the side cast. Despite a swathe of well know good actors, they are hamming it up and it all feels wrong. The language does not suit Star Wars. The gags are quite painful, and then they'll use the same one the next week. Appointment joke I'm looking at you. The Mayors Domo, the water seller, the biker gang. They're all just dreadful. They all feel out of place for Star Wars. I mean one of the London accent kids calls Boba Fett "mate" at one point, like he was arguing with him down the pub in Eastenders. This is not Star Wars language. The rest of it is also very poor. It either very flat straight forward information giving "this person is doing this here" or someone saying an absolutely painful gag in return. A gag they will reuse again. We're only 3 episodes in and we've had about 8 repeating gags and two door traps in the pit. For the love of god write something.

Last but very, very much not least, Star Wars is built on its action, and this is some of the most sub rate action I have ever seen in my life. It's comically bad. Episode 2 directed by Seth Green certainly shows improvements in that regard. But both 1 and 3 directed by Rodrigues feel like he things he's making another Spy Kids.

I wanted to love this show. TM is someone I have a lot of time for, and to be honest he is probably carrying this show hard. He's the only one with any kinda of charisma.

But so far, 3 episodes in, I'm not sure I even care about next week. I'll watch it sure. Will I be eating on the timer on Wednesday like before? Not a chance. I'll see it when I see it.

Hawkeye (2021)

Very promising, can't wait for more

[8/10 · 28 November 2021]

Another entry from Marvel TV, and another great start. As always the production is top drawer and the acting is too.

I've no doubts this will go on to be another brilliant entry in the MCU. 2 episodes in and I want more, that's always a good sign.

The Mandalorian (2019– )

This is Star Wars

[10/10 · 1 January 2020]

All those feelings of watching the original trilogy have come back. The Prequel Trilogy was a mockery of the franchise. The Sequel Trilogy failed to either capture the old, or create a solid new, and got caught in between leaving them a little empty.

Rogue One sailed very close to Empire as the best Star Wars movie going. All by doing what the other two trilogies couldn't do, by recapturing the feeling of the being in the Original Universe. Those movies felt completely separate universes and places from the one we'd known.

The Mandalorian has that feeling in spades. It feels so connected to Star Wars in a way most of the other movies couldn't. The place looks and feels real. Feels like the lawless chaos of a galaxy at war the originals always carried.

The characters don't invite you to like them, they just go about this tough galaxy, surviving any way they can.

The characters are deeply interesting, and are full of myth and lore of their own, away from Jedi. This mythology is also not explained neatly, or offered to you in a grand piece of exposition. It's hinted at, sometimes only in the visuals. Yet the mythology feels connected to everything that feels Star Wars.

Kudos to the creators. It's a wonderful show if you're an original Star Wars fan. The season finale was just brilliant, and the first few minutes has the single best Storm Trooper interaction ever filmed. I've never laughed so hard at Star Wars, and it wasn't a forced or contrived joke.

I've watched the entire first season and I can easily give it 10/10

The Mandalorian (2019– )

Okay, it's only 3 episodes, but..

[10/10 · 25 November 2019]

...it's wonderful. True to the saga. A dirty, gritty, violent world. It is steeped in its spaghetti western in space beginnings.

I can't speak highly enough of the production values, but we wouldn't expect anything less from a big Disney production.

My only complaint, is the episodes are a little short, and one a week! I'd maybe wait till there was more to watch than the current 3 episodes, as you'll definitely be wanting more.

I was born the day Star Wars was released in 1977. It's been there my whole life. Only Rogue One has captured that original feeling of the old, in the new breed of movies. This series also belongs there. Annoyingly shows how you can use modern tech and graphics, and still have it feel as authentic towards ,and like it belongs with, the originals.

The Boys (2019– )

Great show

[9/10 · 7 September 2019]

This is a great TV show, based on even better source material. It's a little bit disappointing they've loosely based it on the comic, as I feel it's a little deeper with the characters, but all written media is like that I guess.

The acting is brilliant, funny and dark. Karl Urban is the loveable rogue, and Antony Starr the hateful villain. Both put in a great job portraying their roles as the opposite side of the same coin.

It's a decent take on the usual superhero story, where there are plenty of Supes but not many heroes.

Aquaman (2018)

Comics and Superheroes are my thing, but....

[2/10 · 24 August 2019]

I'm 40. I grew up on comics, and as I grew up I moved Graphic Novels, before finally being given the MCU and the start of my love affair with Superheroes on film.

This movies wasn't made for me. It wasn't for someone interested in superheroes for the characters, the great complicated story lines, the always in the background morality of great power and what you do with it.

This movie had none of that. Aquaman is like a teenager who's being forced to clean his room. Nothing he does is because he feels he wants to, or because he should do, or because he cares about something. That may be a little unfair, I think his motivation is wanting to look cool.

The script is terrible. The acting is sub par. The plot doesn't make sense. The movie jumps around, but offers no final conclusion that tie it together like most movies that jump around.

Just a rush job CGI fest with no plot, that attempts to coincide money from the superhero dollar created in the last 10 years.

Titans (I) (2018–2023)

A new direction for DC, and it works.

[9/10 · 21 October 2018]

I found this show quite late at night. I didn't know it was being made, I read the brief description, and decided to give it a go. The first two espidodes were available.

I dived in and devoured both episodes. It was excellent, and it left me wanting more. I wanted to know more about the characters, the world they live in, and the story involving them.

The acting, sets, action scenes, and general tone and feel of the show is fantastic. Marvel upped the game when it came to TV based Comic stories, but I feel DC have came in and raised the bar again. It's early days, but so far this show has great potential, and it's dragged me into it.

Looper (2012)

Poor and strange.

[3/10 · 5 January 2013]

The movie was just nonsense. It contradicted itself from scene to scene and was not very cleverly constructed at all.

But the worst thing about this movie for me is that I did not get the make-up on Gordon-Levitt. I, as we all are, am capable of coming to grips with the fact he is playing a young Willis, without attempting to make him look like him. I did not get to the point in Superman where Clark shows up in Metropolis and said "No way, that's not Superman. I saw him in an earlier scene, he's a different man. That can't be him." No, my brain had enough about it to cope with different actors playing different aged versions of the character. So the make-up is odd, and I actually found it took up more of my thoughts than the action/story itself.

The movie lacks anything that sets it apart. That makes it special. That makes it interesting. Generic attempt at an action movie, with ill-thought out Sci-Fi elements added as a plot driver, and poorly in my opinion.

Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011)

Excuse me! Is that storytelling in a summer movie?

[8/10 · 15 August 2011]

I watched the original 'Apes' and enjoyed it. I didn't hold much love for the others in the series. when I watched the reboot with Whalberg, I thought it was OK, but nothing special. Rise of the Planet of the Apes was very different. It was original and striking. Compelling and meaningful. Surprising and different. This is the movie from this franchise that I completely bought into. I got this one.

It struck all the right chords, rang all the right bells and does so without being over the top or clichéd. It was a fantastic movie. Unlike so many other big budget, summer blockbusters, it was all story driven. You could see they spent a great deal of time, and probably a great deal of money, on the CGI for the look and feel of the Apes. But this was done to service the story and not the other way around, which we find in so many films with hype.

The acting was top notch, with Franco putting in a stellar performance, backed up perfectly by Lithgow as his ailing father. But the standout, just like in Lord of the Rings, was Andy Serkis. Like in his previous incarnation of Gollum, we don't see the Actor himself, as he plays the lead role among the Apes, Caesar. His performance was once again flawless and brought Caesars character to life.

I highly recommend this movie to anyone and everyone. It's what most film making should be about. Telling great stories.

Sucker Punch (2011)

Good, but there's a catch.

[6/10 · 9 August 2011]

There are many aspects of Sucker Punch that reaching dizzying heights. Yet so much more seems to fall flat.

Sucker Punch is all about reality and escape. It features different formats for these themes that happen in reality, psychologically and metaphorically.

The action, that I am sure brought us to this movie with it's fantastic trailer, was spellbinding. The director once again uses his own kind of graphic style that adds more depth to the action scenes. They're not as bland as many notable Hollywood offerings. So a big thumbs up for the action and graphics.

The acting was very good. The real star for me being Abbie Cornish, who is a joy to watch in every scene she appears in. Particularly the action scenes. She is one actress who really listened to her trainers and worked hard at on what she was told. I swear if I had not known she was acting I could easily believe she had military training. The rest are a good bunch. Apart from your own aesthetic preferences, you would find it hard to choose between the rest of the cast, as they all performed well and suited their characters. So thumbs up for acting and casting on all counts.

The overall story and script were, unusually from this director, quite weak. Perhaps editing killed some of his vision, but I can not see what more could have been added to make you buy into it any more. The story and script where poor in comparison with the rest of the movie. Not poor as in the laughable, cringe worthy and unwatchable kind. But, when compared with the stunning eye candy that doubled as pretty fine actresses, the grandiose and stunning action sequences and the music and general graphical feel of the movie, it fell pretty short in this area. Thumbs down unfortunately for script and story.

It is this last part that makes this movie a bit of a Thorny Rose. There is so much you will love, there is so much you will hate. I guess the diplomatic rating then would be a 5, but I am slightly leaning on my fence and give it a 6.

Good movie, definitely worth a DVD rental for a Saturday night.

Operation: Endgame (2010)

Fantastically funny film

[7/10 · 25 August 2010]

This movie, although made by Americans, is not for the American market. All the bad reviews seem to be from Americans and all the positive reviews from people of other nationalities.

I am Scottish, who have a very similar sense of humour to the rest of the UK.

This movie is seriously funny. It has so many laugh out loud moments. Rob Corddry is just fantastic. Within 5 minutes of the movie I was struggling to listen to anything he said without literally pissing in my pants with laughter. The rest of the cast are also great and also very funny. Make no mistake about it, this is not an action film. It's a comedy and a very funny one at that.

One other thing I want to note is how stunningly beautiful Maggie Q is. People bang on about Gemma Arterton and Megan Fox. They have nothing on this sexy, sassy girl. There is a wealth of eye candy in this movie for both sexes.

Ignore the negative reviews and give it a try. If you like black comedy, this is a movie for you.

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time (2010)

A thoroughly enjoyable summer flick

[7/10 · 23 August 2010]

As a fan of the video games, I always hoped this movie would hold true to it's source and turn out well. Low and behold for the first time ever it did.

This was a really enjoyable summer movie. Great cast, great scenery, great effects, good script and decent overall story. I must say I was surprised. Usually the video game to movie genre never really works out well. This I am glad to say does. The essence of the game translates to the movie and it does it justice. If there was no game and was an original movie creation I believe it would still have worked.

Gyllenhaal was very good as the prince. I thought he was great in both delivering his lines and in acting out his action sequences. Ben Kinglsy delivers his usual solid, yet ominous, performance. For the boys, there is not any better eye-candy than Arterton at the moment.

The movies look and feel all sits well together and I am sure people who have never even held a video game controller will still enjoy it very much.

As surprised as I was that this ended up a very enjoyable film, I would be even more surprised if it does not get the sequel it thoroughly deserves.

7/10

Clash of the Titans (2010)

The Epic with nothing really Epic.

[4/10 · 23 August 2010]

This movie should have been great, should have been a classic and it should have been Epic. It was not. The original, with a limited budget and quite frankly silly actors, was still a great movie. It told it's story well.

This version on the other hand had a huge budget, some very fine actors and yet it lacks in almost every aspect except CGI. It seems all action blockbusters these days have no real substance other than their effects.

The script is the poorest aspect of this film. Even the lines which were supposed to be Epic and the big lines of the movie did not pay off. The movie jumps around from place to place with no cohesion. There seems to be no real motivation for most of the characters to be doing what they are doing and many seem just thrown in there for the sake of it. Sam Worthington impressed me in Avatar, but is completely lackluster in this movie. His facial expressions and his way of delivering the rather poor lines was pretty awful. Gemma Arterton has been thrown in for eye-candy and her lines were also painfully performed.

None of the other actors in this movie had any decent lines and so their performance was also rather poor. This movie doesn't sag in the middle, it sags the whole way through.

The CGI and action sequences were very good, but they are few and far between. They hold your attention during their duration, but then it returns to it's painful to watch story.

As previously stated, with the large budgets, good source material and some very fine actors in this movie, it should have been great. It should have been Epic. But, instead was actually very poor. Even for a no-brains-required action summer blockbuster.

There are rumours a COTT 2 is in the works. If I could ever request anything from it's makers, is to hire some decent writers, get a decent script and work on the story before a CGI computer is even turned on.

4/10

Salt (2010)

Was not what it should have been

[5/10 · 22 August 2010]

This movie was kind of enjoyable, but only kind of.

Certainly not a top summer blockbuster by any stretch of the imagination. Salt was unbelievable and strangely unlikable. The plot had more holes than Swiss cheese and left little to be impressed by. The script was weak and the setup for the sequel seemed forced and contrived.

Leiv Schreiber was good, as he always seems to be. There is something very watchable about this guy and hopefully his next flick will give him something more meaty to play with. Chiwetel Ejiofor was also quite good, but his lines and general part in the overall story were very poor and he seemed to be in there for just the setup for the sequel.

Angelina Jolie was very poor in this movie. Perhaps because of the one dimensional, unlikeable and unbelievable character she had to play. The action scenes were particularly bad, as it was easy to tell none of it was done by Jolie. This is something most movie makers seem to get right, but in this film it is blatantly obvious that the stunts are being performed by a man. The biggest disappointment with the action is that Salt seems to be able to perform the actions of a superhero, and yet the whole time we have to believe she is but a mortal human being. It disappoints me as Angelina Jolie is a great actress and she has impressed me in many movies.

This film is worth a look at, but not something you would choose to watch again and certainly has nothing about it to get you talking round the water-cooler.

Could have been great, ended up very average.

Stargate Universe (2009–2011)

A more adult Stargate in a new direction.

[8/10 · 12 June 2010]

There has been a lot of negativity about this show, but I disagree with the naysayers.

This show is more adult and serious. If your looking for a show that resolves each episode by the end of each episode, then this is not that show. If your looking for the usual Stargate humour, then this is not that show.

It has taken a leaf out of BSG and decided to go gritty and dark. Many have slated the show for adapting to BSG, but they need to realise that almost all TV and movies are rip offs of something else.

I am enjoying the show and hope it's renewed for another season as it has just started to pick up pace.

I enjoy the performance of many of the characters, but some could be easily ditched next season. Dr Rush is a great character and Robert Carlyle has done an excellent job. I also like most of the science guys. But, characters like Chloe and Eli have become a little tedious and as each episode goes on they don't grow but seem to conform to the bland recipe they have all season.

This is a good show and it seems to me like they are building a good story arc instead of the individually satisfying episodes.

The A-Team (2010)

The Z Team

[1/10 · 10 June 2010]

I have just returned from a screener and all I can say is that is the most board I have ever been in my life. It was awful. I had more entertainment in the theatre in moving from place to place in my seat so my ass would not go numb than I did form anything on the screen.

It has absolutely zero connection to the original series or material. The characters are completely different in every way. The violence and profane language do not pay any homage to the series.

In fact, the only thing this has in common with the old series is the name of the movie and the characters.

I personally see this bombing at the box office and rightly so. The humour is not humorous, the action is generic Hollywood crap and how on Earth they managed to get Liam Neeson in this beggars belief.

this is Hoolywood trash at it's worst.

Kick-Ass (2010)

Simply Kick Ass

[9/10 · 6 May 2010]

Kick Ass is a story we've seen before. The story of a young teen bored with life, disillusioned by the modern World he lives in. A social outcast and dare I say instantly forgettable being. One day he decides to make a difference and sets out on a journey of self discovery and acceptance.

Sure we've seen the story a million times, but never like this. For the first time in several years I sat through a movie without my mind wandering or squirming in chair thinking of the numb piece of ass I am getting. Kick Ass does exactly what it says - It Kicks Ass big time.

The story is great, the characters perfect, the pace is superb, the soundtrack is killer and the action is dazzling. All of the actors are absolutely fantastic in their roles. In particular, Chloe Moretz is simply stunning and you could feel the whole theatre get a lift every time she appears on the screen. At 11 years old, she is all the more impressive. She is surely destined for a wonderful career.

The movies humour is genuinely humorous and not of the usual half-a-smirk variety. The action is intense and extremely violent, but, that's what we all kind of want if we are honest. I say your a kidding yourself if you enjoyed all of Saving Private Ryan as much as the first 15 minutes.

The two stand out things for me though are the movies perfect pace and sublime soundtrack. There are no dull moments in this movie, there is no sagging in the middle, no dreary introductions. The entire movie sits perfectly. The soundtrack could not be more perfect either. Everything works so well.

This movie was simply fantastic and will be my new favourite in my Blu Ray collection when it comes out. Although very graphic and violent, it still seems to have this charm about it and I would recommend it to all adults. Not one for the kids though..........

The Big Bang Theory (2007–2019)

Just Awful

[1/10 · 22 March 2010]

Is this what comedy for smart people is supposed to be? I found nothing in anything they say that is even even slightly funny. I am a geeky physics student myself, yet, I have nothing in common with any of the characters or the things they say. Many of the jokes, and I use the term 'joke' loosely, may be smart but completely lacking in humour.

The main character Sheldon is simply rude and offensive and I personally would slap his face if he spoke to me the way he speaks to others. He is just annoying. Is this the big joke I am missing? Is his rude and ignorant behaviour supposed to be funny?

Maybe it's just me, but I don't get this show. It is boring.

Avatar (2009)

Imagination is limitless.........

[8/10 · 21 December 2009]

Make no mistake that this is something you have never seen before. I find it hard to call a film because it was so much more. The immersing nature of the visual aspects of the film are breathtaking. Your mouth will remain open for large sections of this movie.

I was there for all the big step ups in film making technique. Terminator 2, Titanic, Lord of The Rings and the new Strawars. All of them did that job, astounding work for their times and amazing achievements. But, I never left the cinema after them the way I did from Avatar. You truly feel you have just witnessed something special, something defining, something of our time. A culmination of years of film making to get to this movie. As far as this movie looks, it is simply perfect.

The story is captivating and the characters engaging. It's a tale told many times before, but almost everything is just a variation of older work. But there is so much more depth to this story and a single viewing is unlikely to reveal them all.

I don't know if the movie will be the same when I finally own the DVD and play it on my HD. Can that cinema experience transcend to TV screens? Time will tell.

If you are waiting for DVD, you'll be missing out on something spectacular. If you can get to an I-Max, or see it in 3D you should try, but at the very least go see it on the big screen. You'll be so glad you did

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009)

What a strange movie......

[4/10 · 23 July 2009]

This is a strange movie.

As with all big summer blockbuster action movies, plot and dialog are pretty poor. But, this does not always mean failure for these movies. If you went in and were entertained and thrilled for a few hours, job done. But this movie never really does anything, even bordering on boring for large sections of the film.

There a few high points and I'm sure even the people hell bent on trashing the movie would have enjoyed. But, they are few and far between. The rest of the movie is so poor, you quickly forget what you did enjoy.

The Transformers themselves are just odd in this movie. The dialog and voice acting is just strange. It makes you not like them much at all. The fights are done well, but too short and with too much time between them.

This movie was poor and it may be time to take the franchise in a new direction.

10,000 BC (2008)

Your going to watch this film.

[2/10 · 28 April 2008]

First off, you almost certainly will watch this film at some point. even if it's just to see how bad it is.

It is bad. It's very weak on every aspect of film making except CGI. Plot, Acting, Characters have all been marginalised to pay for CGI. So there is no real story or cool people. Not even a quote worthy of quoting anywhere. Even Independence day had that.

But, the CGI is the great thing about about this movie. It really is excellent and worth taking a look at.

Although, if I were you, I would not pay in anyway to see this. So wait till it's on TV at Christmas one year.

Life on Mars (2006–2007)

Life on Mars......Life on a High

[10/10 · 25 March 2008]

Life on Mars is the best Drama I have ever seen. Period. The premise is so simple, yet the story so complex.

DC Sam Tyler is knocked down in 1996, the next thing he knows he's in 1974. Sam takes us on a journey through 1974 and his journey of discovery about who, what, why, where and when he is. of his situation. Has he time traveled, is he mad or is this all the delusions of a man in a coma? During this time he keeps working as a cop in Manchester under the indomitable DCI Hunt.

This show has everything. Likable characters, comedy, great nostalgia, great weekly stories, great overall story and wonderful scenery.

If you like mystery. If you like cop shows. If you like the 70's. If you like a laugh. If you like tension and thrills. This is the TV show for you.

This is the BBC at their best.