xhidden99 Reviews (266)

Bad Vegan: Fame. Fraud. Fugitives.: Happily Ever After (2022) Season 1, Episode 2

A lot of absurdly long recorded phone calls

[3/10 · 26 March 2022]

Where her husband is verbally abusive to her. It's not so much a documentary as a long shaggy dog story about a strange woman with flat affect and her more bizarre con man husband who's acting like a cult leader. Very odd on the the whole. I think there's a big chunk of the story that's being covered up.

Burden of Truth: The Right Road (2019) Season 2, Episode 8

Most dragged out season closer evah

[4/10 · 16 February 2022]

I think 50% of the ep is tearful goodbyes as the characters close out the plot arc. It makes you think they're going to get rid of most of the characters for good. Maybe maybe not. Who knows maybe S3E1 is 75% of the same characters getting back in touch, tearfully.

Burden of Truth (2018–2021)

Teenage girls run the universe

[4/10 · 8 February 2022]

I guess that's the target demo but the focus on teenage girls talking smack to everyone gets old. Also the lead character, a partner in a big firm spends most of her time not working but only emoting about what a tough life she's had being the daughter of a multimillionaire legal shark who gave her her career. And flitting with all the men in town.

The Strain: The Assassin (2015) Season 2, Episode 10

Next time hire a trained sniper

[7/10 · 8 February 2022]

Seriously, never fired the rifle, never zeroed in his scope, nothing. Of course your results suck. And btw a Mannlicher M95 or Mauser 98 or whatever it was was not a capable sniper rifle. Just sayin, use better tools. And if you can get 'anything', any kind of weapon in this world, get a shoulder fired missile.

The Strain: Battle for Red Hook (2015) Season 2, Episode 9

Neutron bombs are never a bad idea.

[10/10 · 7 February 2022]

Drop a hundred dozen on NYC. Kill every undead and living thing and leave the buildings standing. Sure all the non vamps are dead too but it's the only way to be sure. Then after a few weeks lather rinse repeat. Once the Gamma radiation dissipates scoop up the corpses and start over.

The Strain: The Third Rail (2014) Season 1, Episode 11

And that's being generous

[5/10 · 30 January 2022]

The show is getting soap-opera-ish with the absolute focus on everyone's feelings. Also the disobedient stupid kid who does not listen to anyone so he can do dangerous stuff is a time worn stereotype. With each episode the characters seem to be emotionally devolving into tweens. Everyone is acting less and less rationally with each passing day. And doesn't the population of NYC notice no internet or cell phone service for days on end? If the whole city imploded into anarchy don't you think someone would send in the National Guard?

The Happy Couple (2003)

It felt like a 7 hour movie

[1/10 · 28 January 2022]

Seriously, this is the most poorly written movie I've seen. It makes sense, moves from scene to scene randomly and makes little to no sense. Basically two guys make a bet that one of them can sleep with the other guy's wife in one week. And the married guy is not only all in with that, the two of them meet every day for a status update.

It's a Wonderful Life (1946)

This is about Tubi's version

[1/10 · 19 December 2021]

The maniacs at Tubi deleted the entire section where George sees the town as if he never existed. They cut AN HOUR out of the movie. It's ruined. Complete waste of time. The movie makes no sense. Its now garbage.

The Blacklist: Nachalo (2021) Season 8, Episode 21

Worst television episode evah

[1/10 · 12 December 2021]

This what all writing programs tell you what not to do when creating a script. Having ghosts stand around dictating their story lines. This is beyond lazy writing. They must have scribbled down some notes and outsourced it to their kids. Only explanation.

The Blacklist: Godwin Page (No. 141) (2021) Season 8, Episode 20

It's just wallpaper and background noise at this point

[2/10 · 9 December 2021]

The series is the same stupid episode week after week after week. The funny part is that this is a government program costing a fortune, getting people killed and accomplishing nothing. This should have been a series about Clark at the DMV. It's hopeless. And btw how many times does a guy have to get shot to be a retired FBI agent? Seriously wouldn't they force Ressler out at some point? What's his health insurance cost? $90,000 a month?

Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Locum (2010) Season 12, Episode 1

I watched this back to back with the previous ep

[3/10 · 3 December 2021]

L&O/SVU really doesn't portray women in a good light. All mothers are psychos cranked up to a million. Like off the scale mental cases who are ready willing and able to murder the entire planet to keep their baby close even if their baby is in the other room. On the one hand we have Olivia who, yeah, wants to kill all men. On the other we have Joan Crawford.

The Return (2005)

The most boring thriller in the history of movies

[2/10 · 1 December 2021]

It's just dull dull dull dull. Random things happen, you don't know why. Scenes randomly follow one after the other with nothing to link them together. And by the way there are maybe 100 words of dialog in the whole movie.

Midnight Mass (2021)

Nothing happens and no one cares

[3/10 · 24 November 2021]

Hour after hour nothing happens except long long long monologues on piety and faith. Otherwise it's really just a look into the boring goings on in a small isolated fishing village where everyone knows everyone else's business and there's tons of petty and not so petty grievances. And occasional monsters or something.

The Blacklist (2013–2023)

Entire nations are destroyed to save Elizabeth Keen

[4/10 · 19 November 2021]

Frankly the damsel in distress schtick gets very old very fast. You have to understand that Blacklist isn't a crime show or an action show. It's a SAVE THE CHEERLEADER show. That's the sum if it. Nations are destroyed, governments toppled, every single man, woman and child on earth are thrown at a single objective; Rescue Elizabeth Keen. Every episode the combined might of the 3 or 4 largest armies in the world are sent to kill Elizabeth Keen and she must be rescued. So she can utterly refuse to hide herself or change her life in any way. Nope. Better we kill 50 to 100 people each week while extricating her from the clutches of eeeeevulll!

The Truth About Charlie (2002)

In retrospect, a horrible over use of shakey cam.

[4/10 · 18 November 2021]

It detracts and distracts from the movie badly. You can never get very invested in the movie. Staring into the camera is also badly over used. In fact all the editing is wildly frenetic. Not sure what they were going for there.

Also why does Tim Roth affect a speech impediment?

Red Joan (2018)

It's not a spy movie

[3/10 · 30 October 2021]

If you're looking for a spy movie or a wartime movie or a Cold War movie, you'll be unhappy. The movie is actually an endless stream of Joan and various men, their faces inches from each other whispering pronouncements of love to each other. And occasionally Joan gets angry and slaps someone.

Out of Death (2021)

Every single second filled with county music and classic rock

[2/10 · 18 October 2021]

Luckily there's almost no dialog in the movie so you can savor every moment of the soundtrack. But as to the movie it's very simple. The entire movie is bad cops chasing a woman through the woods and mud. That's it. There's no beginning middle or end.

Into the Dark: Treehouse (2019) Season 1, Episode 6

Every single Jimmi Simpson character is the same character

[3/10 · 13 October 2021]

Not that he plays that character badly, it's just that it's 100% the same guy in everything he's ever done. I think even most of the dialog is the same. I can't be the only person who sees this.

Sour (II) (2021)

This is crap

[1/10 · 9 October 2021]

Everything is terrible from the acting to the writing to the lighting and sound. The camera work is insane. Random scenes of birds in the park and blank walls. Some shots out of focus for no reason. And everything is handheld shaky. There's even a problem with the video camera being unable to keep up with movement like the buffer is overloading. It's straight trash.

Medium: The One Behind the Wheel (2007) Season 3, Episode 12

The unending jazz tune every second was great

[2/10 · 6 September 2021]

Especially since it's a boring two note tune that goes on and on and on and on. And on and on and on. And on. And on.

A Little Help (2010)

Another dysfunctional family get together move

[3/10 · 3 September 2021]

Number 347. Another big angry messed up uppermiddle class white family that gets together solely for the purpose of screaming at each other movie. It's great background noise.

Grandma (2015)

Genuinely intolerable people

[3/10 · 18 August 2021]

There a not a single character in this movie who's not despicable. They're all selfish abrasive narcissists. Especially Tomlin whose character not only treats people like objects, she has an almost paranoid sense of self grandeur. For all her screaming about helping others she helps only herself. If this is feminist empowerment I didn't get the memo.

Close to Home (2005–2007)

SVU 2.0 with headlines ripped the news, etc.

[3/10 · 12 August 2021]

Two angry women prosecutors switch sides to defend women from the evil men in the world. Every ep they yell and scream and fight with their bosses over how they don't do their jobs. In the meantime EVERY man in their office demands they purjure themselves EVERY ep.

Rage (I) (2021)

Will no one mention there is almost zero dialog

[3/10 · 29 July 2021]

For a 2 1/2 hr flick there's maybe 300 spoken words of dialog. The other 98% is mood music. I don't think there was a single spoken word in the first 45 minutes. In fact the female lead character is rendered mute. There's got to be more to a movie than sad slow piano music.

The Affair of the Necklace (2001)

Worst sound editing evah

[3/10 · 28 July 2021]

Between the utterly overwhelming score that fills every second at top volume, endless background noise especially crowd noise, and the barely audible dialog, this has to rank as the worst sound editing in the history of talkies. The composer and the foley guy are criminals.