nmk2002uk

The original version of this film (Will Hay's 'Ask A Policeman) was a classic. This, the remake, wern't as bad as some people said. Starring 80's comedy icons Cannon and Ball, the plot went that the two bungling policemen were in danger of losing their jobs because of the lack of crime in their little town of Little Bottom (pronounced Botham). Until some bad people start to steal a load of pricless paintings. The two start to investigate, even encountering a ufo along the way. I liked this film. I wish i could still get it. (I'm looking around for it but am unable to. If anyone knows where I can get a copy, type to this page, please!!! I will be in your debt!)

"Flesh....Brains....Trousers!" Well, maybe not the last one but Zombies always seem to be after the same thing: Food. I mean, don't they ever want employment? Money? Well...no. They don't actually. Because Zombies have been shuffling in to our cinemas for over fourty years (so, they should be paid, damnit!), starting off with George A. Romero's 'Night Of The Living Dead' which, sorry George, I didn't like. For me, it was too slow (I know Zombies don't run!) and it got boring. But Shaun Of The Dead...it's a different story altogether! It's fast, funny as hell and can actually get you moved (one part in perticular which I will not mention. You'll have to find out for yourself!). 29 year-old Shaun works 9-5 in an electric appliance shop. One day, after deciding that the most romantic place to take your girlfriend out to is the Winchester, she decides to dump him. However the day after, all is not what it seems as the undead stumble about, fall in to his garden and gets photographed by one of his best mates called Ed. Who else can use records to try and get rid of the undead? Maybe he should have tryed a bit of Des O'Conner. That would have shifted 'em! Simon Pegg is great in his first major starring role as the anti-hero Shaun. But it's his best mate Ed (played brillliantly by Nick Frost) that steals the show. His quips and suggestions just come out of the blue! I won't give too much away. Just that shuffle along to the cinema, get a big bucket o' popcorn and get ready for the funniest hour and fourty minutes of your (undead)life! This is an excellent alternative to the other zombie movies out there but I will say this: is ISN'T as gory as the other movies!

John Woo. How you have made us happy. With Mission: Impossible II, Broken Arrow, Paycheck and this, his best effort, FACE/OFF. Everything is here: diabolical villains, lovable heroes, pulsepounding situations and his trademark: two-gun diving tomfoolery with white doves. Granted, it does get a bit confusing when trying to explain to someone who hasn't seen it, but just tell them to watch. The best two hours of my life. John Travolta plays a damn good cop and a damn good villain. Mind you, the same can be said for Nicolas Cage. They play each other excellently. The surgery scene is a bit gross but the way they get Nicolas Cage to sound like John Travolta is amazing.

I just read through the other comments on the site and, to be fair, they are allowed to have their opinion. But mine is: it may rip off star wars (Which this doesn't touch. I'm a fan of both!), it may have crap effects, some of the acting may be suspect but the show defined the era. Good vs. evil. Hope against dispair. Life against death. It's just a shame it only ran for 24 episodes. I bought the box set last month and I haven't regreted it. I still love the show even Sixteen years after first watching it. You may think it's crap. I think it's good. And to what one of the other writers said about the alien beliefs: i'm with you on that one. I mean who's to say that it hasn't already happend? Or that at this very moment, a ship the size of the whole contenant of Russia isn't looking for us right now? Trying to bring back home the one's who left all those years ago? Trying to at last find peace? It makes you think, don't it? Anyway, the show was great at the time, and even though it has dated alot, it still brings some entertainment to a new generation of fans who have seen the Abomination that is the new mini series of Battlestar Galactica (Starbuck......a woman? Come on! Don't be so stupid!), and want to see how it all began. About how they got far away from the Cylons (them, too, have been made in to women. WHY????). Give me the original any day, thank you!

There was a little doggy. He had four friends. They solved mysteries in their 'Mystery Machine' and unmasked a new villian every week. But the villain always said the same which became its catchphrase. "And I would have gotten away with it too! If it wasn't for you meddling kids and that dog!" Yes....I liked Scooby Doo. I still doo... sorry, do. I used to, and still, watch every day when I get home from work. So I was skeptical about a movie of my favourite hound being turned into a computer animation. But still, for me,...it worked! Matthew Lilard was great as Shaggy. Freddie Prinz Jr. wern't bad as Fred. He was a little 'up himself', if you will. Daphnie seemed a little like a spoilt brat but Velma, along with Shaggy, was the only one to survive the transition to the big screen. The plot, they separate after a big bust up then get back together to solve the BIG mystery, was a bit o' good writing. The best bit is in the airplane then the plane (watch for yourself. I don't want to spoil it!). But it did lack teh polish to make it great. If they had made Daphnie like she was on the show and not like Angelica of the Rugrats then she would have been lovable. The same with Fred. But still, it is a good romp. Just unplug yer brain fro an hour and a half and enjoy the fart jokes! Rooby Doo!!!

In days of yore, there was a pirate. Not a very good one. His name struck fear into the hearts of many a terrified schoolchild! Yes, This marks the return of everyones favourite pirate with a silly name: Guybrush Thropweed..erm...Threepwood. I found The Secret Of Monkey Island and Monkey Island II very good. It had laughs, the puzzles and good graphics. But....11 disks for the Commodore Amiga version of number Two! Appart from that, they were enjoyable because they were cleverly thought out. The graphics at the time where excellent. This one is a worthy addition to the series. It marks a departure for the point and click system: say hello to a 3d control system that makes the game a tad hard. Especially on a PS2! But it's a small niggle to a good game. Oh, if anyone finds out how to get through the gate in the swamp and fight Pegnose Pete, it would mean alot to me!! I'm that rubbish at it!

If you love The Naked Gun movies, the Airplane movies, Top Secret! and South Park, you will LOVE this. I laughed so much, my ears popped! Two guys invent a brand new sport that sweeps the nation. 'Nuff said! The film is directed by the king of these kind of movies: David Zucker. It even has eye candy in the form of Jenny McCarthy and Yasmeen Bleeth. Its as crazy as Airplane! As insane as The Naked Gun! As Stupid as...as....making mashed potato with your bum! Even though its only on for 90-minutes, the constant ribbing of Squeak Scholari by Trey Parker and Matt Stone is funny on its own. Yes, its rude. And yes, its crude. But...its only a bit of fun and not meant to be taken seriously!!

Its better than Dawn Of The Dead, not quite as good as Evil Dead 2 but is good in its own right. Story is: Five friend go to cabin. Find Book and tape recorder. Release spirits (Jack daniels and vodka, please!). Carnage, dead things and strangness ensues. When I first saw it, it ran for Eighty minutes and had the good stuff cut. Bugger! So, bought the DVD, good stuff back in equals RESULT! I can't really understand why the BBFC cut most of it. The effects, good back then, are lame.The actings a bit suspect but strangly....it works! And did you know there was a game of The Evil Dead released for thr Sinclair Spectrum waaaay back in 1983 that also got banned. Just for going round and carving up already dead people. Blumming silly! At the end of the day its only a movie. And no harm ever came of reading a book. Ooo, whats this book? Necromicon, eh? Berius Arter Necting...........JoIN uS!!!

When that bullwhip first cracked across the screen, everyone wanted to be like Indiana Jones. To have the adventures, the women and the fights. But until then, I guess we all will have to make do with this the first of the trilogy (though second in chronological order.) The first time i saw this, was 1988. BBC1 showed it uncut for the first time. This might spoil the ending but I didn't like the bit with the faces.(I was only six!) Then, I started to like it. Then, I started to love it. The DVD boxset is worth it though. Remastered for a new generation of fans, The movie is still reguarded as one of the best films of all time alongside star wars and the godfather. But in my eyes, it will always be THE best film of all time with its special effects, witty one-liners and a hero to really be proud of, this really deserves to be your next purchase!

"It's the Final countdown..dunnah, durrrnah" Sorry, wrong one!! Anyway, this movie is alot like the other time-travel movies around like Back To The Future and even Star Trek: First Contact. The story goes that an aircraft carrier, the U.S.S Nimitz, encounters a storm on supposed calm waters then the skies and waters turn calm again. Thinking its strange phenomena, they still think they're in 1980 but...it don't look like they're in 1980 anymore...! Starring Kirk Douglas and Martin Sheen, this is one of those 'what if..' movies. I mean, if you had the chance to change something in you're life, would you take the chance and do it? Or would you let nature take its course? It all goes back to Doc Browns theory: If you change an event in the past, it could have serious repercussions on the future and could threaten the very existance of mankind. I haven't seen the last twenty minutes of it yet....but I intend to!!!

Who hasn't heard of Star Trek? Oi, you at the back! I know you've seen it! Fans of Star Trek have long held this Trek adventure as underrated. Yes the original version might have been rushed and yes, it might not have made any sense whatsoever but the Directors version is SO much better. The plot is still the same: Mysterious cloud heads toward earth. We humans don't know why. Only that it decimates three klingon ships and has a powerfield bigger than Uncle Festers gob! So, Kirk takes over the new Enterprise from a clearly cheesed off Deckard to go greet its new visitor. Now, I've seen the two versions back to back. And I have to say, Robert Wise really redeemed himself on this. While I thought the original version was good, this version is SOOOOOO much better. Its a shame that the commentary seems to have been wrote down and recorded separately instead of together as it seemed informative but was a tad boring. But if you get the chance to watch the new version, don't pass it by thinking "Huh, the original was rubbish". Give it a go. Go on, you know you want to!!!!

Finally got this on disk the other month. And it was worth the wait. As an avid Porridge and Ronnie Barker fan, I thought the film done justice to a really funny series. Other movie spin offs have been mundane(On the Buses, for example), but this one was well written and well acted. Starring the original cast from the series (apart from Christopher Biggins), it continued Norman Stanley Fletcher's fight against the system. Even though it did contain a couple of jokes from the program, its a mere overlook to a really funny film. Even Fletcher with his little scams (McKays teeth bein gone example) have trasferred well to the big screen version. This is one film you wouldn't want to do time!

Like the other creations on Glen A. Larson, this was mindless fun too. Like Knight Rider, Battlestar Galactica and The A-Team, It had the ideas, the story, the characters and was executed very well. It used the same effects system as Battlestar Galactica but was based along the lines of the 1930's series of Buck Rogers starring Buster Crabbe. The story goes that in the year 1987, Buck blasted of into space to probe space. Events take a drastic turn as his ship and his life clock freeze, putting him into, what seems, an eternal orbit until four and a half centuries later when he is revived by Princess Ardalla of the Draconian Empire and sent back to earth but it's not as he knows it!!! Gil Gerard stars as Captain William 'Buck' Rogers in what isn't as good as Battlestar Galactica but is good in its own right. Where as Battlestar Galactica has, in my opinion, a grittier feel, Buck Rogers has a comic strip, family appeal and look to it. Some of the acting is suspect but not in some places. If you liked Battlestar Galactica, give this a go. You never know, you may like it!!!

"There are those who believe, that life here began out there." These words marked the start of a new sci-fi show that featured robots, ships, bigger ships, planets, space and more robots. Yes, I remember when I got my first taste of Battlestar Galactica for the first time back in 1986 when it showed on BBC2 at 6pm. Aged only four, I knew this program would be in my life forever. My sister used to watch it just for Richard Hatch and still does! The Twelve colonies of Man have been fighting the Cylons for over a millenia. Finally having a choice for peace, the Humans take it, not knowing what lies around the corner. Only Adama's two sons, Zak and Apollo know of the empending doom from a routine recon patrol. Racing to get back to the Galactica, one of them gets blown to bits when a Cylon attack force races towards the fleet of Battlestars. If you've seen the series and the feature-lentgh movie, you know of the quality of the effects were, at that time, groundbreaking. Now, they're just pants. The actings good along with the plot. Its just those effects. That niggle aside, I still love watching both the series and the movie. Oh, don't bother watching the new one. It don't match up to the original. I mean...Starbucks..a..Woman!!

Where to begin. I could qoute a sketch or even a funny line. But I won't. Instead, I'll Leave it to The Python team. First released waaaaay back in 1975 when Do-gooders banned Death Race 2000 (acting so crap it was good!), We brits released this little gem. Now some people don't like Monty Python, but I love it. And this film just sits at number two with Life of Brian being better. Telling the story of King Arthur and his knights of the Round Table, they set off on a quest to find the holy grail while on the way confronting the Black Knight who won't give in, The Killer Rabbit, The Black Beast Of AAARRRGGGHH, and others.There are some very funny moments like the french taunting (silly knn-ig-its!!), the Castle Anthrax and Sir Bedeviere's theory on the Earth being Banana shaped! And not a tin of spam or singing viking in sight!!

It's.....Monty Pythons Flying Circus. And how good a circus it was. None of those annoying clowns here. Just damn good sketches, jokes, joke documentaries and spoof gameshows are what we are talking about. This, the Python's first movie, is a collection of their best sketches from series 1 (and two, I think?) made into a movie for more people to laugh at. It's all a bit silly, but, no one likes a good laugh more than I do.....except my wife.....and a few of her friends. Oh, yes and the midget around the corner. Come to think of it, everyone likes a laugh more than I do. The best Highlights of the movie have to be The mountaineering expedtion sketch, the 'How to defend yourself against fresh fruit sketch' and 'How Not To Be Seen!' The sketches they should have included are Spot The Loony and Mr Gumby's Brain consultaion with the supposed surgery. But as it stands, its funny. A bit silly, but funny. And Now For Something Completely Different: a man with three buttocks!