Xstal

IMDb member since October 2004
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    Lifetime Total
    1,000+
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    Poll Taker
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    IMDb Member
    16 years

Reviews

In the Earth
(2021)

Terror Firma...
A frightening, gruesome and irregular interpretation of the 'place we call home' conjuring a reaction to the parasites that seek to inadvertently destroy it. Phenomenal performances, sound editing and direction.

Gaia
(2021)

If You Go Down to the Woods Today...
...beware of those exhibiting tendencies associated with excessive consumption of Psilocybin or you may find yourself drawn into a mycelium world of animated mould, mushrooms, fungi and toadstools! There are better examples of the apocalypse that awaits.

The Killing of Two Lovers
(2020)

A Marriage Made in Heaven...
... but lived in a real world, in reality, where unsupported collapse, distraction, deviation and despair far too often rule the roost. An outstanding and convincing performance by Claude Crawford, held high through incredible cinematography and sound that carries you into a fracture as visible, visceral and raw as any you'll come across.

Infinite
(2021)

Interminable, Incessant, Unending & Unremitting...
You'll wish to reincarnate, reverse, rewind, reject and regurgitate the decision that brought you here as a woeful pantomime of typically more successful films, although by no means all, are perpetually reconstructed, reconstrued, reconditioned and rubbished.

A Quiet Place Part II
(2020)

Smash Bang Wallop...
An uncommon sequel success that matches the originals pulse and raises it some too. With banging performances, smashing special effects and a story that has plenty of wallop to build on for the future, this is well worth finding the courage for and tuning in to - you wont be disappointed.

The Education of Fredrick Fitzell
(2020)

Fast Forward, Rewind, Pause & Start Again...
... and that's just the basis for the bizarre events you'll encounter but also good advice for anyone brave enough to tackle the multiverse probabilities of every decision they've ever made and their associated repercussions, consequences, causes and effects - every single one of them, alongside everyone else and their pathways of possibilities.

The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It
(2021)

Abracadaver...
Invoking everything you've seen before and embellishing it without mystery, suspense or tension, devil clearly not in the detail, the only nightmare: you wake and recall watching it the next day!

Surge
(2020)

A Manic & Disorientating Meltdown & Breakdown...
Chaos and confusion reign as the world of a troubled man caves in, self destructs and obliterates, leaving the audience equally challenged and quite often awkward and uncomfortable - which is exactly as intended you suspect. Outstanding lead from Ben Wishaw.

Cruella
(2021)

The House of Rubella...
A rare diversion for Marge Simpson as she joins a monochrome ensemble, as irritating as scarlet pimples, while going through the process of conjuring a major disappointment, especially after all the publicity and hype.

Wrath of Man
(2021)

Wrath of Haemorrhoids...
Fortunately Preparation H is on hand to clean up and what a mess he has to cleanse, as dysentery envelops the complete plot from beginning to end leaving a mind-stain you'll struggle to wipe away.

Army of the Dead
(2021)

Caught in a Trap in your Head...
... or Raiders of the Resident Evil Dead Alien Predator Underworlds - whatever it is, originality isn't one of them, but some things are worth resurrection, reanimation and resuscitation and the ziger and zedusa were zuperb.

The Woman in the Window
(2021)

Windows 2021...
A familiar tale, that replays, reinstalls and updates, primarily for improvement on the past but inconsistently as successful as previous incarnations, especially the climax - which is a blue screen of death, a fatal exception, time to power down, reset and start again.

Oxygène
(2021)

ClaustrO2phO2bic...
Far from pure, but don't let that contain you or hold you in, as this story of a woman reawakening in a cryogenic capsule with the breathable air rapidly depleting will have you pinned to your seat throughout, unable to escape, while conjuring a plethora of finales, endings and conclusions - any number of which quite plausible, however...

Cowboys
(2020)

Escaping to Pastures New...
A genuinely honest, brave and contemporary tale of a bi-polar father escaping the confines of societal expectations alongside his young trans son. Great performances, great scenery, candid and incredibly heartfelt - well worth exploring.

Undine
(2020)

A Shape of Water...
... and that shape can be pretty much whatever you want it to be which, depending on your interpretation, might be as hot as a kettle or as cold as ice, a sinker or a floater, completely cloudy and obscure or gin crystal clear. Beautiful performances all round, elegantly performed, imaginative and, in my view, water worth testing, if for no other reason than to test yourself..

The Mitchells vs the Machines
(2021)

A Rhombus of Infinite Subjugation...
Many a true word said in jest in this jest packed production that successfully parodies a host of familial, social and technological scenarios and nails them with aplomb. You'll recognise something in all the characters that you're familiar with in the analogue, some traits a little closer to home than you might like, but take it on the chin, smile and embrace what you really can be - before it's too late and the machines try and take it from you.

Tom Clancy's Without Remorse
(2021)

Without Prime or Reason...
Catastrophically chaotic, cobbled and as dull as dishwater - what a waste of great talent as a wholly unoriginal, irrelevant and out of touch tale of yesteryear flails and drowns in its own juices - glug glug glug.

Boys from County Hell
(2020)

Girls Not Allowed or Salem's Not...
A pretty tedious affair, script and acting as Am-dram as you'll find with a disengaging story although Sam Neil's Irish brogue is a surprise and the special defects aren't too bad.

Retfærdighedens ryttere
(2020)

You Know These People...
... they live close by and you may well work with them, you could even be one but I don't think you would know if you were. Demonstrating in a highly amusing and often hilarious way the dangers of mixing dogma, mental health and assumption. The cause & effect of cause & effect causing some unpredictable effects & consequences.

Mortal Kombat
(2021)

Fatal Disengagement...
Ticking all the wrong boxes, with appalling acting, action and special defects through a disjointed and disconnected story, you will find it challenging to get to the end and wish you hadn't when you do.

Nobody
(2021)

Like the Cold War but Not as Much Fun...
... and a tadge more violent as revenge, retribution and honour (ignorance) obediently knife, shoot and thump, to provide a rousing patriotic splendour that's sure to get a few more innocent people killed!

The Courier
(2020)

Redelivering, Redistributing, Recycling...
A tired and tested, formulaic and uninteresting variation on a theme, the fodder of yesteryear, dredged up and re-spun, albeit based of fact but not enough to satisfy post viewing thought - easily repackaged and returned to sender.

I Care a Lot
(2020)

Layered Like a Silky Onion...
... subtly peeled and elegantly revealed, potential and expectation heightened and amplified, you're lofty expectations divided between wrong and wrong - totally decayed by an appalling final 3rd.

Raya and the Last Dragon
(2021)

Universality & Diversity...
... vital ingredients for a safe and fair future, for overcoming the perpetual perils presented, amplified through youth and the empowerment of women; without bias, prejudice and corruption - environments not so often encountered in the analogue world we inhabit.

The Year Earth Changed
(2021)

A Leopard Can't Change its Spots...
You would need to be extremely optimistic to believe that in twelve months 'The Year the Earth Changed Back' isn't documenting a return to lessons unlearned - but we live in hope. This brief but beautiful insight into animal reclaim should leave us under no illusion of the adverse affect we have on the ecosystems of everything around us, including us - here's to spot changing miracles, ideally before the spots are wiped from the surface by agents of change that are out of our control and influence.

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