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Reviews

I Spit on Your Grave: Deja Vu
(2019)

Bad Deja Vu
Yes this surprisingly 2 and a half hour duration, something I never anticipated for me, was thankfully entertaining, and in no way boring. With that said, I'm with the 95 percenters/majority opinion this was bottom basement, where our evil revenge seeking extensions of family deserve to be in, one tightly padlocked. The idiot who truly, really got on my goat, I so much wanted to end him, the long haired imbred hick, the worst actor in the film. The 3 separate ISOYG films are all so much better, and stand superior, in a different class, to this garbage, and the other trashy original 40 years earlier, that spawned it, evidencing the limitless talent of filmmaker, responsible here, now in his 80's. The script has some unbelievable, atrocious, and laughable dialogue, which has to be heard to be believed. You will experience many eye rolling, and WTF moments. There are of course, some moments of revulsion, apart from some partial bits of the rapes. The story is set, like 25 years later than the first one with a partially beefed up Jennifer Hills (the returning Keaton) is kidnapped by our revenge seeking imbreds, With Hills, is her very attractive model daughter, oh and she's the biggest supermodel in the world, but not the prettiest, Being a liability and not in the planning, she of course is taken too, and of course becomes the hero vigilante, left to carry the last 90 minute duration off. I do like how the story was stretched out, and there were some 'didn't expect' moments, and some 'didn't expect' scenes, the latter giving the movie, some small minutes of dignirty. The old demented hick couple in their untrusting and consistently backfiring ute, named, get this, LUCY, were a hoot, especially the woman, a facade really bellowing more sinister intentions, providing a twist I liked..There were some intentional moments of laughter I liked, but more so, unintentional moments of laughter, and I think saving acting grace (Bernadette), like her character, was a trooper for doing, and carrying this. She was surrounded by some pretty bad talent, Keaton too shouldn't escape criticism, after giving a so much better believable performance in the original as our revenge seeking lead. Some real over acting moments, sadly disappointing, What happened Camille? Olsen, the revenge seeking widow, I'll never forget, the visual character, that jumps out in memory, dressed up in, like army garb, riding a four wheels scooter through a makeshift town,.is a cool attribute. Unfortunately the most pathetic moments, are in the kills, unoriginal, stupid, ineffective, like the movie cover poster too. Bernadette's revengeful standing, sickle and knife clutching form, standing in a pool of blood, should of much bigger. When I first saw this poster, and readIng the reviews, I thought this film was gonna run short on all cylinders, and not be watchable.I was surprised and gladdened, just how entertaining, the biggest plus for me here. The ending, instead of hearing a boat motor and seeing a rightful, revenge satisfied beauty, you'll hear Lucy of a black screen instead. Hopefully, this is the last one. No more I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVES. Ever.

Bad Guys
(1986)

Ring of laughs
Bad Guys is an awesomely fun movie about two cops who moonlight as wrestlers. Honestly they really make it look fun. These two dudes are very likeable and relatable, one being the versatile Baldwin, who donned straight curly white hair, here, which does not agree with him at all. You first have to look at his face on the movie cover to realize it's him. Jolly the more handsome serious flat mate and cop partner. Breaking up and partaking in a pub brawl, their suspended. Like Baldwin's hair, their laboring job doesn't agree with em', Next is stripping which is great, except for only being mobbed by 40+ and 50+ aged women, whose looks, beateux and not, are less less flattering. After being dumped up on Mulholland Drive, by the steamed up, old ducks, they're at a loss. What I like about Baldwin's character, is he's so optimistic Thank god, that cutie assistant manager Nicastaro (Body Rock),who saw their wrestling showcase, weeks earlier, planted a card in their hand. The movie is entertaining, and goes into the wrestling scene from the get go. It's trashy fun, a 80's movie with trashy appeal, cause it's 80's. Most of the laughs, happening in the ring. The evil and good wrestling stars you'll never forget, just like the money greedy, and dirty playing Lord Percy by the great James Booth. Norman Burton is typecast as Baldwin and Jolly's captain, he and Booth also doing Pray for Death at the same time, and guess who Burton was in that. Ruth Buzzi (The Gong Show) adds excitement, sometimes, over excitement, and spark as one of the two cops/stud's trainers. But Bad Guys in an exciting movie, another one, I should bang my head against a door, for not watching it 34 years back. It's got heart, great characters, fresh laughs and like Running Scared, is a great buddy cop movie, more or less, as policing is not all they do.

Borat Subsequent Moviefilm: Delivery of Prodigious Bribe to American Regime for Make Benefit Once Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan
(2020)

Borat's back 2020 style
I'm really getting sick of reading, but more so knowing 150 percent, disgruntled viewers are gonna give comedy sequels a bad rap, when judging it against the first, no matter how good that sequel is. Infact I've gone from watching sequels to the original, and laughing less at the latter. Same goes for remakes, to an extent, and I'm not talking just comedies. This was funnier than I thought it'd be, but then again, I must realize who's responsible here, for this push the envelope comedy genius, and throwing all of the disastrous 2020 in with it .I was in no way disappointed at this sequel to one of the biggest iconic comedy characters, which Sasha Baron Cohen, a brilliant actor, expertly revives, in a superbly played role, not losing his form, one iota. Again with so much brazen gal, balseyness, it's just amazing how far he'll go, where no controversial figure as of recent, gets away unscathed, no more than our recent failing, brooding president. There is some immoral, if sometimes sick scenes, but we can only laugh. I will say there is some underlying adult themes, particularly a scene near the end, which paints a more serious shade of movie.I will say the spunky actress playing Borat's daughter really impressed me, and the storyline was fresh and original, with a classic story twist, that is in bad taste, and will catch you off guard. Cohen is very clever, in his style of comedy, and I know it's a style he'll never lose. That's guaranteed in laughs. An impressive mouth full of title too.

DEFCON-4
(1985)

What could have been
Defcon 4 has a plot, had one ever existed. It does, an original one, only it hardly gets off the ground. It's a not much happening movie, steered by really capable actors, the baddie I'll always remember, one of the trio of good guys, such a cool hotheaded dude is killed early, which is another miss (this actor- this film his only credit-lucky him) D4 actually starts off quite good, but then slows into lazy mode, almost teetering on boring. Then pretty much soon it's over, if not really given itself a chance. Shame. The VHS cover makes it looks super exciting. If only. What you get is a slow B effort. The movie is enthralling in some aspects, to me, when first viewing in 1986. It has a different story and freshness to it, but the story has been lazily managed. A misfire on many fronts.

Vigilante Force
(1976)

Angry forces out
This unremarkable films involves vigilanteism with a greedy twist, as ex vet pilot, Offertson is called upon by his younger brother (Vincent) to restore peace and stability in a small town, run amok, by the big strike of all. Local cops can't contain, the scary mayhem and violence. There's not much at all here, except some moments of no brained stupidity, and the chance to ogle Principal's beauty, looking very different to her later Dallas days. There are some nasty shock moments, but overall, pretty l ordinary. VF is an entertaining, undemanding movie, with some dumb yokels, and an unintentional amusing Vincent, in his moments of anger.

Halloween
(2018)

Not the best Halloween
Oh what a come down I was on, I gotta be honest. I was short sheeted on many things here. Even in it's starting, which showed so much promise, out on the checkered grounds, outside the psyche ward, with our aging Michael. being bravely approached by our young hunky English journal, such a suspense building moment is literally robbed from us. It was despicable. Now a recluse, haggard Curtis still bares the brunt of Michael's inflicting rage, where the memory still burns forever deep. Most of this Halloween seems cliched, as in the scenes, that take place on that special cooky night, especially as compared to the last Halloweens, which Rob Zombie did so much better, it's almost dejavu (did like the hot blonde babysitter) as we have hot horny teens making, and kids running amuck. Don't expect all out gore. A few heavy splatters and lashings, here and there. Will Patton, a fine actor, was totally wasted as the sheriff. For me, this film, just seems to hold back on a lot of stuff, and was shortly running out of puff, relying on predictable plotting. A shame as it marks Curtis's return, and it's a well oiled performance it is. The best to come out of this, is a nice cunning twist, you won't see coming, as was my expectations. Forget it.

Criminal Law
(1988)

Crime not to watch this
Watching this as being the second Gary Oldman, I watched, after his electrifying performance, it felt quite weird to watch him play a subdued character type, who's great and annoying to watch, in those moments in burning testosterone, rejoicing in those narcissistic wins. He comes to the fatal realization, his latest client, (Bacon) who he's been freed, could well be the serial killer who's been killing women, surreptitiously involving and luring Oldman, in his sick twisted play. Now Oldman must make things right, redeem himself, and beat the smart playing Bacon at his own game. You question how many clients, their defendants believe are guilty, and why would you be one, if you kept thinking they were. The great photography and unsettling mood of the film, it's raining night shots, work beautifully for this tight little thriller, that deserves more acknowledgment. I really loved these nifty little straight to video films, of this late 80's time, DOA, Dead Bang, Stormy Monday, to name a few, and Criminal Law takes pride of place. Oldman is impressive in his opening statement, his character so far removed from Sid Vicious. He rarely plays characters I like, but is a brilliant character actor who can play anything. He's the most underrated and underappreciated actor I've ever seen. But it's Bacon's performance, here, which I really liked. He has the ability and skill of character, to entice you and instill enough menace, to give you the willies. He doesn't ever go overboard, the markings of a successful actor. Another plus is Joe Don Baker as a detective and the female mains are talented as they are beautiful. Great Film cover too. Fitting.

Arctic Blue
(1993)

Arctic Surprise
This isn't the movie, I'd thought it be, plot wise, but nevertheless, I found it refreshingly different. You know any movie with Rutger, he will deliver on his fine actng stakes, chops. Like C Thomas Howell, after The Hitcher, these 2 were basically pigeon holed in B grade straight to video movies after a few more cinematic releases. A combination of The Edge, Deadly Pursuit and a little Surviving The Game, The Grey, Arctic Blue walks it's own different path, as quite an interesting action pic movie. The lesser detail of plot works better for it, in fact. In self defence, Rutger, one of a trio of trappers, shoots a rival trapper, another one out of three. The other two are left freezing to death. After a relaxing, wash down in a hot spring by a gorgeous Asian lass-a whore who practically has her legs wrapped around rough bearded Hauer's throat, he's picked up and charged with murder, where from here, we have a sort Deadly Pursuit, Berenger and Poitier thing going on, instead of more intensifying plot development, where a friendship grows between cop and bad/good guy, and an inspiring, admiring Point Break ending. A well acted action pic, and the beautiful whore is visually memorable and luring. Above average, run of the mill actioner/drama, that warrants a recommended view, and Hauer turning in another fine and cheeky performance, come summer, rain, spring or fall.

Miami Vice
(1984)

This vice should be busted
One sure as s**t fact about this show. The dazzling sequence of shots: pink flamingos. babe's buns, etc, played against a kick arse instrumental by Jan Hammer, in the opening credit sequence is way better than anything that follows. Style, no substance. It has lazy, unbelievable, and I have to say weak, story lines, that provide so many pathetic and laughable moments, and this show has been nominated or won awards? I can't believe Mann, who went onto make great movies, was responsible for this. Near the end of 86', there was an Aussie tele movie, reminiscent of this, called Sharks Paradise, which had better input, and sadly didn't go on to be a series, but that was better than this. So was Don Johnson's song from that year, Heartbeat, which I loved. The reviewers giving this 8 or above must be on cocaine themselves. Many guest actors, some of them, a surprised entrance to us audience, out play then hunky Johnson and Thomas. Edward James Olmos, I really appreciate in this as their commanding officer, while Crocket and Thomas's offsiders (Talbott and Diehl who are really like) provided the lighter more comical side, especially Diehl. It's such a blessing when a random instrumental plays over the ocassional scenes per episode. Miami doggie do do. Get a head check.

Dead Bang
(1989)

Bang bang actioner, a non miss
Don Johnson is truly one of these underrated actors, whose recent scope of work, I highly praise (Machete, Django). He just gets more impressive. In his heyday, a few years after his Miami sweats, he did this solid '89, under the radar actioner which was a perfect vehicle for him. Dead Bang escaped a cinema run, and played at an Adelaide drive in, as the additional flick, to a double feature. It deserves much more attention than that. It has a fresh premise, and his Jerry Beck cop character is the tough, new cool, unconventional cop, we instantly like, and understand. He does something really unconventional, you haven't seen in other films, after just chasing down a biker suspect.Things aren't going terribly good for Jerry. A lot of personal stuff. The personal meter is raised, when this latest homicide, is one of his own, perpetrated by a white supremacist/black hating brainwashed idiot, who avidly pours a number of shots in that unfortunate officer, after just blowing away a black store clerk. His investigations has him following the trail, across Nevada, after the culprit. Penelope Ann Miller is so sexy in her limited scenes, it's a crime, and a straight arrow, anti expletive FBI agent (Forsythe) is top form, Jeter, fun, as a condescending Woody Allen look a like shrink (my favorite scene), who Johnson puts back in his place, or chair I should say. Brad Sullivan as a fast talking, yokel cop is fun in his limited duration, Dead Bang is a well made, good action product, from the get go, with appealing performances, the film's crime, it's poor recognition, Watch and enjoy. Love the look of that triangular shaped pastry, Johnson is offered too, midway.

Dead Again
(1991)

90'S Hitchcockian thriller, anyhing but dead.
The more I think about Dead Again, the more crafty I find it, and have fun, in it's understanding of just how well honed, and delicately structured this thriller is. Fine actor Branagh and Thompson give impressive dual performances, especially Branagh, who we are impressed time and time again by his sheer acting range, that sits respectively high on a pedestal. This Hitchcock type Noir, comes at as us from a different and original angle. Woman who's suffered amnesia, has a violent memory, triggered by a so called event, involving her and her lover in the 1940's. But how can that be? Worse for her, now, is her new protector (Branagh) for hire, whose services come free, tries to help her retrieve her identity, reminds her much of his lover (Guess) who supposedly went to the execution chamber, followed by handsome reporter (Andy Garcia) scoop in toe. The film has the right amount, of beautifully, lavishly set sepia scenes. The late great Williams and Knight in small roles are bonuses in this, Williams, another acting great here. If you want something completely different and fresh, check out Dead Again. The scene involving 90's young hunky actor Campbell Scott, masquerading as Thompson's so called husband, provided a WTF moment, seemed just so out of place, and was rather stupid, but I guess, if I nit picked my brain for a couple of hours, I may'be closer to fitting that piece in. You won't be able to stop yourself from analyzing DA, during that 100 minute watch, but with this one, you'll be so eager to see how the whole story makes sense, of the end. Jacobi, is not the kind of hypnotist you want either. Love the crescending opening music score in the film's opening.

Unhinged
(2020)

Don't honk Russ
This was a perfect return choice film, my first during the Covid, but makes barely a 7. This psychological action thriller is road rage on a higher level, but is not really instigated by the poor fortunate woman soul, who this murderous psycho Crowe, who kind of hams it on at the start, continuously pursues, and makes this hell day for her. This is the, "What if, we crossed paths with a psycho on a rage, is more like it?" We've all been there, behind that driver who won't move, when the lights hit green. If that unmoving motorist is off in space somewhere, or is just a unrelenting psycho, I go with the latter in the instance. This is the road rage, or just rage movie that keeps coming at ya, and really doesn't stop for anything in this highly entertaining, engaging, perfect 90 minute time frame, of film. The movie does have it's flaws, but there are some incredibly tense and heart pumping moments, and I really did like the plot of story. Crowe's terrifying performances ups that intensity, one revengeful driven psycho, and he does have his reasons, where he's someone you're glad, is fictional, as you'd never wanna come across this nut in real life. Unhinged, is a film you underestimate as to how far Crowe's "the man" (he does have a name, and no front license plate) character will go or more statedly does, and there is some quite ugly violence and shock. On the whole Unhinged is a nasty film, from the opening frame, and is great if you wanna kill, not people, but 90 minutes. Thank god for happy endings, and Pistorius, who we really sympathize with, as this was the last thing she needed on this particular fay, the victorious, valiant beauty, we can take delight in sharing her golden moment of revenge. Good dramatic actioner that like I said, keeps comin' at her, it's attribute.

Betrayal
(1983)

Infidelity runs high
I just came to view this film, the other day after a 34 year absence. I was mesmerized just like I was, when I was 15. This isn't the sort of movie I 'd normally watch, as first happening to catch it, when playing as one of a few in house movies, while me and my mum were on one of my Dad's business trips in Alice Springs. What held my complete attention for that 95 minute duration, was the spellbinding, mesmerizing, engaging, and magical performances, steered by 3 great actors, for which this film is a perfect teaching tool. The actors do so much with their roles, but the brilliant Kingsley and the sexy Hodge, do hold rank over Iron's performance which is still very good.The screenplay is fantastic, where like Irreversible, we start at the crux, then go back in time, and before then, and before then etc, till we arrive at the catalyst, which is a kind of a blow, as we get so involved in the movie. Irons, a literally agent, and his client, Kingsley, a narcissistic, shrewd, respected novelist, who always speaks in an questioning and sometimes condescending tones. Unfortunately,. they are best friends. Hodge and Irons have been going off, and having sexual rendevouz's, unbeknown to Kingsley, although we have a strong notion he knew. Instinct, whatever. He is the third guilty party, as having also being seeing somewhere on the side. This tightly dialogue driven, and classy script, has long sustained scenes, and unhurried flow, where we're just pulled in by the performances, where the film heavily relies on em', the driving mechanism of it.. Again, I must warn you, Hodge his hot, so keep em' zipped up. A rare stand alone film.

La polizia chiede aiuto
(1974)

Cop this Italia exploitation
Though the film's innocent, optimistic music score, serving it's title, which I really favor, will be one which will stay in my head, this Italian exploitation crime drama doesn't fare too badly, if not for a crappy and simple ending. It is a stylized effort, bursting with some nice graphic shock gore here and there, and a cool, anger driven cop character, heralding it. A full masked psycho on a motorbike, is the responsible killing hand, to a first initially thought suicide of a young girl, caught up in a schoolgirl prostitution ring, involving many a high up party of clientele. A great car/bike chase through the paved streets of our Italian city, some shock scare moments, some T and A and some kinky pimp talk via secret tape recordings, doesn't amount to a compact drama, where this one falls short, especially in the thriller, construction stakes. And yet again, we're still haunted by that music score. Cool frank movie poster, not the one illustrated on this IMDB page.

6.5/10

The Last American Virgin
(1982)

A virginal, visual surprise
What kind of puts a downer on TLAV, is there are Hot Bubblegum'ish moments as if cloned by the preceding 82' effort, of course, coming as no surprise, being made by the same legendary Golan Globus identity, connected with a few other Cannon T and A pics. This one, however is different and better, maintaining a seriousness and the makings of a solid comedy/drama, although there's hardly much that's funny about it. Love crushed, staring creepyeyed, Monoson, perfect for the part, falls for hot latin bombshell. Franklin, who later went onto to play Monique is savage side aplitter. Better OIf Dead. Only impasse here. is Franklin is more keen on Monsoon's best and better looking friend.This film takes itself more as a drama, than a comedy, anf pays off. There's a few pointers to be learnt here. Hot girls don't like secure guys, and the finale, paves a path of where this leads. heavy hitting loss. There's shades of Fast Times in this too. Granted TLAV is highly and colorfully entertaining. and we really do feel for Monoson, he and this plump girl making out, sets one humorous classic scene, that'll crack you up. This movie has good intentions, and it really works. A coming of age, 80's drama' comedy, with some classic 80's hiits and genuinely good performances. Lively, gaudy cover makes a must see, oi which you won't be disappointed..

Bliss
(1997)

Blissful
This movie is a welcomed surprise and quite a good way to end cinema 1997. Bliss, not mistaking it for the eccentric, and unique Oz film of '1985 is a wonderfully and astutely written film, about the damage of a suppressed memory, from many a year ago in the haunted mind of Maria, so beautifully played by Sheryl Lee, such an impressive take note actress. I won't go into the memory itself, but is much responsible for Maria inability to achieve orgasm. The movie has such thought provoking dialogue of high standard, in such a very crafted adult drama, that reigns a true, sort of classy original. This is one of those really underrated drama's, our three main principals, characters, ones we really get involved in. Sheffer's arrogance and inexperienced grasp on his newly wedded bride's cry for help, a damsel in distress, makes such an angering contrast, Lee, who like many other beautiful women, have been sneaking into this uptown private building to seek solace, sexual fulfillment and understanding under the watchful eyes of a legend sex therapist (Stamp) professionally solid, and the third heavyweight performance, where his practice has previously tried to be shut down, by law figures, quite a shame, considering his psychological insight. The first confrontation, with Sheffer, who Stamp mellows by asking him if he wants tea, mirrors a scene in the much earlier, 97' Oz indie pic, Idiot Box, only Sheffer doesn't have a knife. Stamp does have a hottie on the side, Lois Chiles, who played the scheming Holly Harwood in Dallas, bedding Jr in such a saucy trademark scene, I'll never forget. The flow of story is steadily, wonderfully manned, and this film is much more than just a one, two week, adult sex pic, it's cover different from the one here, kind of misrepresents it. Bliss is a turn of surprise, you'll be glad you've slapped your twelve bucks down on movie night. One scene with Sheffer telling random people he loves em', is hilarious, and we see Sheryl Lee can play characters way outside of the taunted high school chick, Laura Palmer, her performance so real and lasting. Make a date.

Damned River
(1989)

Damn!
This movie was better than I thought it'd be, as judging by it's cover, and B grade status. We have a sort of Deliverance and River Wild geld together. Instead of going for the gore, this goes for suspense, but some idiotic choices and moments sort of kill it, in part. Hunky Shellen indeed plays a good Mitch Hedlberg looking psycho, who hottie Aliff can't keep her eyes off, until he goes nutty and the attraction quickly sours. Shellen plays a rafting tour guide, who has may'be led one too many tours, throwing his anger on competing African tour parties, who are actually the law. They know who this guy is, and set wary eyes on him. There are great shots of white water rafting, a little occasional violence, including a beheading, and like his new rivals, we too so much want him to die. This film showed promise, and sexy Aliff is really good to look at, but DR is a B grade Deliverance, that really doesn't have enough plotting, and gives way to the obvious. There were some real stupid moments in this film, but there was some real suspenseful ones. Terlesky's demise was affectingly sad. The film just didn't have enough ingredient, but a truly memorably haunting closing credit, music score.

The Blackout
(1997)

AF B grade coolness
I will say this- Abel Ferrara makes good, slice of real life movies mostly from half baked.scripts. The Blackout joins that list, a movie even more darker than the underrated, and so harshly criticized, Dangerous Game, and with a similar haziness, and atmosphere, to the one he did called, The Addiction, one AF film, I didn't particularly like. This movie could even serve as a severe warning, to how drugs, booze, sex, and blackouts, make a deadly cocktail of destruction, where in this case, there's no turning back, for our leading man, Modine. He plays a lesser known, down and out, Hollywood actor called Matty (catchy) now hanging with the bottom crowd of actors, filmmakers, of course, led by a somewhat shady director, yes, you guessed it, Hopper, who indulges in sex orgies and filming borderline porn, with girls half his age. One scene right near the end, showing him in a familiar, if cliche'd Hopper anger, almost took it's toll on me, partly due to the late actor being such an unappreciated talent. A list model, Claudia Schiffer dabbing in the acting, doesn't fare bad as Modine's new girlfriend. His former one, Dalle, caused him much distress, and again, you'll see why these vices, suck and have such irreparable consequences. Again, the message in this movie, is that indulging in these vices, can only lead to destruction. What I love about The Blackout, is the less is more, concept, the ambiguous factor, leaving us trying to fit the pieces, while wanting more. The Blackout is a cool AF film, with a poster that kicks arse, and really makes for a quite engrossing drama, it's last scene of a washed away Modine, cooly metaphoric. It's a solid made film that boasts, professional, and real performances, and Hopper bragging about remaking that 1982 vaguely known adult sex drama, Nana, instigates a few chortles. On the whole, a definite recommended view, and Schiffer is cute, and so is Annie 2.

Skinheads
(1989)

Z Grade Romper Stomper Theatrics
In the first couple of minutes of this trash, I was in shocked marvel. How the hell can they let, such appalling and laughable acting go to film. Skinheads is so bad, it makes Pariah look like a good quality film. I was truly disbelief at how bad this was. Again we have our tribe of brainwashed skins causing mischief, mayhem, and of course, senseless murder by a gang, with no sense, who feel they make sense in their Neo Nazi world. They even pick on a little back kid, in the film's innings, punching him in the stomach, or more correctly implying it, the guy's moron/bad actor's punching fist never hitting skin, which I've seen in other amateur theatrics. The head honcho, of the gang is fun to watch and listen to spout his own proses, belief's, stays with me. One of his gang, is the dumbest skinhead ever captured on film, in a movie, so dumb, it defies belief, and it really doesn't get better, even when it progresses, with a guy and girl, the only survivors is a shootout and shocking display of violence, perpetrated by the skins, who don't really take to blacks, and begins a dumb cat and mouse, with the skins and their pray in the big American wilderness. Our duo hardly act upset, or show their loss, almost as if they never saw their friends slayed, and everythings normal, The only saving grace, acting wise too, is legendary tough guy, Connors, and it's Chuckie to their rescue, a stubborn, war veteran, in a role tailor made for him, as like other roles, made for him. I rolled my eyes, shook my head, and my mouth drop many times during this schlock. I've seen some of Greydon Clark's other stuff and really liked it, and that's why I can't believe he would make something like this. Like many characters, he should of been taken out too, or better yet skinned. 1.5/10

Madman
(1981)

Very likely to make you a mad man
This shocker horror, and I use it in both definitions here, is another of the Palace Explosive Video VHS collection, and I really don't hope you run into it, if in a movie sale. This is B Amateur theatrics. The actors, even the young ones, seriously need a firecracker up their a..se. Again we set the scene around the campfire, where a fictional tale of this killer called Madman Marx, and guess what? You can't say his name, even at a whisper. This is bad acting, save for Fred Neumann, an respected thespian, who played the weird and kinky Fantasy Fred in 1987's Working girls, where he went under an alias actor name. No wonder. He's the best one to watch to where unfortunately were left with a most shoddy pool of performers, we so much want to be with the pros, at Camp Crystal Lake. Here we have a group of gifted kids watched over by their older, and of course, hornier councellers, who, yes, are picked off by one, in some, quite gruesome ways, including some beheadings, and wonderfully stylish neck squirtings of blood, aplus, and really amateur suspense, where we prettty much know, where this big cliche'd maniac giant is. Madman is just poor film making, as if is some B version of a similar much better film. Forget it.

The Delinquents
(1989)

Kylie and Charlie
This period piece, taking us back to the 50's in Bundaberg, Queensland of all places, is a Romeo and Juliet tale that doesn't fare too bad. Hunky American export (Schlatter) falls for blonde hottie Lola (Minogue) where soon, thanks to adverse opinion by locals, family, they're on the lam, hunted down by police. The movie gets quite serious, as it shows us how ironfisted, stalwart the law was, as well as corrupt. The much missed Bruno Lawrence I liked, as a bosun, who sides with stowaway Schlatter, keeping him and better half, down deck. It's a happy ending in a kind of cruel way, as to having their unlikeable folks in a chow down, but it's one you will remember. You will also remember a woman face from Moving Out, as Minogue's new girlfriend, who provides the most tragic moment of the film. Minogue holds her own as the temptuous and impulsive Lola and she does have a nice a*se, Sexy and flirtatious, she really gives the character oomph, where I did like Schlatter too, but didn't measure up to Kylie. Her mistress at her boarding home, is one of the nastiest pasties I met. As for tears on your pillow, you'll have to wait till the end credits. A good Aussie, period piece drama, especially for you romantics. Delinquents is an unfair term, to these two characters though.

Balboa
(1983)

Lifestyles of the rich and shameless
I look at this, and wonder as a movie, what was the point? If a rauchier Dynasty and Dallas collided, we would get Balboa, as it is alternatively known, it's bold cover, showing a bold beautiful woman, generating much interest, under it's bold title font. It's R certificate here, lies mostly in it's flamboyant nudity, and there's nothing wrong with a couple of t..ties, a tame R considering, if stacked up against that sleazy B movie, New York Nights, 2 years later. Many of you are gonna be disappointed. Balboa is basically about the fat cats, who live and sail, on this beautiful marina of lavish houses, who score the beautiful women half their age, wanting security and beautiful things. Tony Curtis, a playboy, who has a beautiful woman, who I've seen in other films, as his lover is legit, she really loves him, yet Curtis, deep down, is a really nasty and spiteful character, you just to hate. In one whole sense, he's reprehensible, profiteering, from a gambling scam. An old lover, Lynley really hasn't moved on from him, but now is bedding cutie, stud mayor (Kanaly, Fleshburn, Dallas), a David Carradine sounding actor, the good guy, intent on bringing Curtis down, in a none too satisfying ending. Characters cross paths, through passion, power, bed swapping, and we have a sexy middle aged narattor-ess, to add some spice, to this somewhat bland pic, up. I do quite like this movie, as I have seen it a few times. Some of the unconvincing acting of course, invokes laughter. Sonny Bono's scenes are well appreciated, a classic laugh riot, priceless, and then we have, over the top acting from the great Chuck Connors, which I also appreciated. The films pumping theme, by Leo Sayer is just what suits this, and I do like the song itself. But Curtis is such a cynical, stubborn idiot, not just for letting such a tasty, deliciously beautiful philly go, and she is ravishingly beautiful. If best, the film educates you on how greed, can have such damaging effects. Some actors overacting, nudity, fights, face slaps, beautiful woman, veiled threats, frank ones, account for 96 minutes, a lot of you, will want to try and get back.

Big Shots
(1987)

Get a shot of Obie and Henry
Big Shots is one of those films that comes along only once, a rare few. What's so surprising in a film with an almost complete cast of unknowns, save for a few mains, and bit performers, the film is written by a guy who went onto pen some sleazy addictive sex thrillers, where this was one of his early efforts. The film which had a brief showing, a movie with morals, and is so more deserved of much better recognition, starts off with one of the most beautifully written scenes, between father and son, that's always stayed with me, so much more dramatic, as a family tragedy ensues shortly after. The unlikely duo of Obie and the black kid, Henry, I think it was, becomes a friendship like no other, as the pair run afoul of mobsters, police chases, a cigar chomping geezer who won't return a special watch, and other stuff that make's Elizabeth' Shue's Night on the town, seem small fry. Robert Joy is unforgettably funny as the clutz mobster, before becoming a raping mutant, 20 years later. He stays with me. It's the hairstyle. Big Shots is something different that becomes a real adventure, when an ending as warm as it's beginning. It doesn't pretend to be something fancy, or bigger than it is, and that's what I really liked about it. A solid well acted comedy drama, and sadly of 87's most neglected films. Paul's Winfield's small number of scenes, are worth the great performers attention.

When a Stranger Calls Back
(1993)

A sequel calling you
Here we go again, 14 years later, the same expanse of time as the two Basic Instincts. I had misgivings at the start. This movie starts off, as if cloned by it's hit predecessor. and I'm thinking God. Within short minutes, I'm having a WTF moment. Weirdorama, and I'm impelled to sit and watch it out, where this movie cleverly changes it's tune, and becomes more engaging and clever, the more the story progresses. Hot 80's, into the early 90's, eye candy, Schoelen, (remember her?) give a fine believable performance, as the babysitter hired by a couple very much like.... yes, and guess watch, little brother and sister, upstairs sleeping, I'm really not gonna say much more, as I want you to sit back, be riveted, and watch it unfold. Noted, there are some unavoidably stupid moments, and the killer here, is a real sickie, of a much different and talented sort, which I really didn't buy into the reality. Good news, are two mains, are back in fine form, from the old one, Kane, minus a family, with busty ex PI,, Durning, returning to team up with our now woman counceler to help poor Scholen, who could be having delusions of grandeur, or is schizo. What makes this film such terrible fun, is you so much want the whole enchilada of story. Of course, this doesn't rise to the quality of the original, where at times, you just feel like you're going in stupid, nowhere directions, which had me comparing, it to another sequel, in contrast to the original of that one. But I'll be honest, I was somewhat really impressed by parts of this. Don't be a stranger..

Class Action
(1991)

Class act
I've seen my share of courtroom drama movies, where after a while, some become so cliche'd, almost, as I am expecting to see Joe Mantegna in these. Class Action, though nothing spectacular, or earth shattering, is one court movie that somehow set apart from all those others. You just have to take a look at the cover to know why. We have the warring parties of father and daughter, both exceptional in the judicial system, locking horns in the courtroom. Hackman, representing, typecast, powerful, stubborn, ignorant sort (I think you get the gist here) tailor made for this role. Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio, such a capable actress, holds her own too, like her character, as opposed to her father character. The issue here involves a 1985 (great year) car manufacturer, which I'm familiar with, who are in the habit of designing cars, that blow up on unwitting drivers, so we have a few pi**ed party, who don't really want compensation, but justice, which was a moral, I really liked. You can't put a price on a human life, and these companies are ones, who have to face those harsh penalties. A line that cracks me up, is the opening remark from Matt Clark, as the aging judge, when father and daughter, introduce themselves. The most memorable performance is of course from Hackman's character's wife. Mastrantonio is such a likeable character, who we really want to root for. Aussie Friels, who had a meal of a time in Darkman, plays her boyfriend, and is a kind of silky scumbucket here as Mastrantonio's, collegue, but the movie belongs to effervescent Mastrantonio. Class Action, I like for it's family angle of story, and the last beautiful frame between our two rivals, when the guards are dropped, shows these two for who they really are, a mutual admittance of their own flaws. Class Action has a straight simple plot, no real surprises, and there's nothing earth shattering about it. It doesn't ride on much, if just on ordinary, but it's an ordinary I like, because this film has such true, precious morals, you can take with you, and that's make it one of those rare finds, that shine out from all the others. That alone, is worth the admission fee.

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