"I got soul but I'm not a soldier"- A BORDERLINE MASTERPIECE "Southland Tales" is Richard Kelly's follow up film to "Donnie Darko" (2001), which is considered the greatest cult film of all time. "Southland Tales" premiered at the 2006 Cannes International Film Festival, where it was met with heavily negative reviews but was nominated for the Palme d'Or. Kind of ironic.
"Southland Tales" is about Boxer Santaros (a movie celebrity who is married to Madeline Frost, the daughter of political candidate Senator Bobby Frost) who mysteriously returns from the desert to pursue his new screenplay "The Power", which he co-wrote with Krista Now (a porn star who hosts her own reality TV show which talks about "teen horniness", she also has an ability to tell the future, and has links with the secret underground group that call themselves the Neo Marxists). Ronald Taverner, an LAPD cop (who holds the secret behind a grand conspiracy, and also works with the Neo Marxists) plans to act as his twin brother Roland Taverner, (who is the actual cop, and is being held hostage by the Neo Marxists) to stage a double murder with Boxer Santaros accompanying him in an attempt to negatively affect Senator Bobby Frost's campaign and to destroy US IDENT (an organization that keeps everybody under surveillance 24/7. Which is also run by Bobby Frost's wife Nana Mae Frost). Pilot Abilene is an Iraqi war vet (who was severely injured in Iraq due to "friendly fire" by Ronald Taverner, who accidentally threw a grenade in his direction.) who was a movie star but was drafted to go off to Iraq to fight WW3. He now has a severely giant scar around his face from the "friendly fire" incident. Abilene now smuggles "straight up" Fluid Karma, (which is a new found power source found in the ocean just off the coast of Jerusalem, which serves as a global, wireless, fuel) which in this case is used as a drug that is injected into the neck which can make you "talk to God without even seeing him", or lip sinking to The Killers "All These Things That I've Done" while dancing with a dozen women dressed as Marilyn Monroe. Abilene is the narrator/ fortune teller/ God's point of view throughout the entire movie. He spends most of his time reading the Bible, specifically the Book of Revelations, which plays a major role in the story of the film. Finally there is Baron Von Westphalen, the discoverer and founder of Fluid Karma, who is also behind a top secret undercover science experiment run by Simon Theory (who is actually Kevin Smith).
The way to describe "Southland Tales" is the Kardashians meet "Donnie Darko" meet "Magnolia" (1999). Now I will be completely honest I did not like this film originally, this is a film you have to watch more than once to fully appreciate. Now I have read analyzed reviews of the film, which helped me understand the film the second time around. After watching it a handful of times I will openly admit that this is a great movie. I'd like to categorize this film under the "it's so good it's bad" category.
Kelly brought to life a work of pure originality and imagination, and was canned for it. "Southland Tales" is probably not if the most original film I've ever seen. What I don't like most about people who HATE this film is that they constantly say "I didn't understand it." Well guess what I didn't understand it at first and so did many other people. Nobody knew what "Mulholland Dr." (2001) was about when they saw it but it's considered a masterpiece,, people didn't and still don't understand "2001: A Space Odyssey", and it's considered one of the greatest films ever made. Just because you don't understand a film doesn't mean you have to hate on it. Look around the convoluted story and see the great acting, cinematography, and at times cheesy looking CGI. The thing with films that are so original and unique is that I can't hate them for being different and non-mainstream; that's why I appreciate/admire most of David Lynch's work, I may not like his films but I can't hate them for being so unique and original.
The thing with this film is that it just didn't find its audience. This film was so ahead of its time for 2006, until now in 2016 we can relate a lot to how our technology, politics, and society is just as crazy as it was in "Southland Tales". US IDENT sees everything and spies on people 24/7, much like how people can track our history and location with cameras and computer chips nowadays. This film's depiction of the future was completely spot on despite it not exactly happening in 2008.
One thing I must stress out is that there is a lot of footage that was cut from the movie to make it much shorter and less confusing, I'm all for that but Kelly and his editor took out a lot of important information from the film. For example the character of Simon Theory did not have an introduction in the film, he was just some guy in a wheelchair with a big beard. From the footage that was cut from the film he was introduced and you knew what purpose he had in the film besides being the Santa Clause version of Kevin Smith. General Teena MacArthur was a character that was cut completely from the film, and actually helped explain some things about US IDENT. And one other thing, what the hell is Curtis Armstrong and Jon Lovitz doing in this film!? I'm not saying they're bad actors, it's just that they barely played a significance in the film and I felt their talent was very underutilized.
Overall "Southland Tales" is one of the best worst films I've ever seen. I really don't suggest this film to people, I'll let you decide if you want to watch it or not.