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Snake Eater

clearly the worst movie I've ever seen
There is nothing at all good about the movie. The plot doesn't make sense. Not much else makes sense. Lamas' character barely manages to do anything right, and often completely blows his chances, and is only saved by the director's determination to move forward to his victory. The fight choreography is laughably weak. Every villain who dies essentially commits suicide. The gross parts just motivate you to turn off the TV. The editing is horrible. The attempts at humor are completely flat. The make up is unbelievably bad - it really looks like a bunch of frat boys dressing up on Halloween to look like hillbillies. You are never able to suspend disbelief because of the continuously horrible movie-making. I could go on and on, but this movie isn't worth the effort.

The Perfect Neighbor

lower quality than a made-for-TV movie
I agree with the previous writer (except that it was her lover that she killed first, when he refused to leave his wife).

But more than that, this movie is worse than a typical made for TV movie. It has lower production values and barely manages to maintain interest. There is absolutely no suspense at any point, even though it should be a suspenseful movie, if it were true to its cover art.

I also was surprised that Susan Blakely got third billing, so I take some pride from that, that I'm probably not as wired into the soaps as I could be. The pairing of these actors must be based upon soap fame.

Don't waste your time.

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