remurmur

The premise is that Jeff Goldblum is miscast as the lead a hometown production of The Music Man, but he takes it so seriously it doesn't feel like a joke. Not to mention that he's not even that bad. It sets itself up like it's going to be a great prank, but the whole thing might as well be real. Nobody ends up more than mildly flustered with Goldblum's performance, and the production itself ends up getting a standing ovation. Who is the joke supposed to be on? The whole affair ends up being too real. It's truly as boring as watching a bonus feature documentary on a Hollywood actor doing a small production musical.

The 2 is for a handful of lines that made me chuckle, but even Goldblum fans should skip this. I recommend it to no one.

Blue is one of those artsy films that portrays itself as smart and classy by being very slow and low-key. Which can be great, if done properly. But is utterly boring if executed poorly, which is the case for Blue.

The barely-there plot is simple and can easily be summed up in a paragraph. If you read a synopsis, you'll pretty much know what it's all about. But that's OK right? You don't need plot if you've got a solid character study. Well, that's also a problem, as the central romance revolves around two introverted girls with little personality and even less to say. I was completely unable to care about the characters, who barely seem to care about each other. Nobody ever really seems happy in this movie. Emotions are muted and smiles are rare. They never have a convincing reason to love each other, which I suppose is not unrealistic, but it's not interesting. Everything is so internalized that there's nothing to see.

Then there's the cinematography, which should be the saving grace but isn't. Scenes are well-structured and shot, but are constantly of such boring material that it doesn't matter. The editing is fit for a three-toed sloth, with scenes routinely lasting five beats longer than they should or having no reason for existing than to realistically depict the dull monotony of life. Occasionally, there's some great visuals to be had. There's a beautiful twilight shot towards the end of the two girls in front of a vending machine that illuminates one while leaving the other a silhouette. However, such moments are fleeting, and the vast majority of the film is visually bland. Also, there is almost no soundtrack, so it's not even an interesting film sound-wise.

If you're interested in this film, I suggest you read the manga first. It's got better pacing and is only a single volume long. The film adapts the basic story, but also changes quite a bit. The two have their similarities, but feel quite different.

I know there is sure to be a niche audience for this sort of thing, but it's not me, nor will it be the average viewer. It may resonate more if you're gay or can at least identify with the characters. For me though, it was just unforgivably boring. Know what you're getting into and approach with caution.