gstan

I knew it was going to be raunchy. I was hoping for INTELLIGENT raunchy. This wasn't it. This was a 12 year old boy's bathroom idea of adult humor ... obsessive scatological humor, rude sex jokes with absolutely no subtlety at all, swearing just for its shock value, blood and gore with no purpose, racist jokes, gay jokes, sexist jokes.

The entire movie was one big "let's shock the hell out of them and see how much we can get away with". I didn't laugh once.

While all of the actors did a credible job .... EXCEPT MacFarlane .... I can't figure out why any of them would want to associate with this pre-teen idea of funny. Are they all so hard up for money that they'll appear in any crappy script put in front of them? As for MacFarlane .... well, I wasn't familiar with him. I didn't see "Ted" and I didn't know he was responsible for some of the worst junk on TV (American Dad, Family Guy, etc). His acting is so riddled with his smart-ass attitude that you just want to smack him.

Okay, I realize Hollywood is Hollywood and it is normal for them to bend reality a little for the sake of their art. And I can suspend belief for a few hours when necessary ... after all a science fiction movie is fiction and a fairy tale is just that. But this film didn't "bend" reality so much as break it, throw it in the mud, then trample all over it and toss it in the trash.

I could fill at least one tightly spaced page with all the things that defy reason in this film but I'll try to limit myself to just a few. I have been to Alaska in the winter. I know people that have worked the oil fields. I know that in Alaska or Northern Canada you don't wander around in near white-out conditions, with the temps below zero, without COMPLETELY covering EVERY part of your body. You don't tramp around with your ears, nose, chin, etc. unprotected, and your coat only partially zipped up, as the survivors did when they left the plane.

The Neeson character is shown at the beginning of the film using a high-power rifle, which he carries in a distinctive case. After the plane crash he finds his rifle case and his broken rifle, but he also finds shot gun shells in the case. ???? He didn't even have a shot gun; why would he carry shot gun shells? We later find that they are a contrivance -- tossed in only to foist an completely unrealistic plot element on us. (I guarantee that using those shells the way the movie tried to would result in MAYBE 1 in 100 of them firing. I can explain why if you can't figure it out yourself) Again, the weather. After spending a night in a blizzard ... a night in which their fire goes out (at least there is no fire in the morning scene), at least two of the characters are shown waking up bare-headed, their coats partially unfastened and no sign of blankets but, miraculously, they are bright-eyed,almost chipper and ready to go after their hours long ordeal in sub-zero weather.

The wolves. What can you say about the wolves except that real wolves act NOTHING like those depicted in this movie. No real, wild wolf would go anywhere near fire the way these mutts do. Real wolves don't hunt humans over miles and miles of territory like the movies unless MAYBE ... PERHAPS ... they are near starved and ready to eat anything. Real wolves don't normally kill unless it's for food. And how did those wolves get down that massive cliff anyway? And how did they know in advance where the humans were going? They must have known since they were there waiting for them. If you want to know what real wolves act like, read Farley Mowat.

I didn't have time to try and enjoy this movie as art because every few moments My reason was assaulted with totally contrived, totally unrealistic plot elements. I kept finding myself shaking my head and telling myself, "That's not remotely close to reality." As I said, I could fill many lines with similar discrepancies. I wouldn't be so critical if this movie was marketed as a survival FANTASY, but it's not. It's presented as a straight forward survival movie with some attempts at mysticism and philosophy ad nauseum thrown in. Don't waste your time.

Just saw this joke of a film last night. I can't believe it was nominated for any awards anywhere. I wanted to get up and leave before it was even close to half over but couldn't because I wasn't alone.

Four words describe this waste of time ... trite, contrived, tedious and improbable. Every plot twist, every action sequence, every everything was grabbed out of thin air and stretched thin. The plot, the action sequences, the historical accuracy, the amazing coincidences (all thru the film) -- everything in this film should have been given a reality check before they wasted resources on it.

I give it one star just because the opening and closing shots were, indeed, gorgeous.

It got three stars simply because I like Will Smith. But the movie....? Let's see what did I learn? If you screw up badly and are consumed by remorse it's okay to kill yourself as long as you give a couple of body parts to some "good" persons. How about living, learning, overcoming your remorse/guilt, contributing positively to society and helping to improve it and help others not make the same mistake you did? Nah...that's for wimps and sissies. And since I didn't have a clue as to why the main character was acting the way he was and doing the things he did it wasn't long before I didn't care about him or why he was doing them. Before this thing was half over I wanted to get up and leave. The only problem was that I was already at home and had nowhere else to go. I don't understand the people that talk about how this movie left them feeling all warm and fuzzy. It left me cold, disgusted, and disinterested.

I can't believe that this movie even got a 5.9 rating. Should be zero. The casting stinks. The acting stinks. The directing stinks. It's historical accuracy stinks. It's technical accuracy stinks. This thing could only appeal to someone who has absolutely no knowledge of or appreciation of history or has no military experience of any kind. If you want to know what it's like on a real submarine, watch 'Das Boot' which is probably the best submarine movie ever made. It's casting is excellent, the acting first rate, the timing/editing spot on. 'The Hunt for Red October' will give you a good idea of the mentality of military men. It's also well done and technically accurate.