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- Cartman's dream about being abducted by aliens turns out to have actually happened, and when the aliens take Kyle's brother, all of them must find a way to bring the aliens back and confront them.
- Cartman leads a campaign against the Jews after seeing "The Passion Of The Christ." Meanwhile, Stan and Kenny try to get their money back from Mel Gibson and discover that he is completely insane.
- When everyone in South Park decides to forgo presents and celebrate a non-materialistic holiday season, the boys try to bring the spirit of commercialism back to Christmas by making an animated film.
- Stan learns about the Mormon religion after a new family moves to South Park from Utah. Caught up in the family-friendly doctrine of the church, Randy declares the Marshes to be Mormon as well.
- Kyle tries to crossbreed an elephant with a pig to win a science contest.
- The kids and their families take a vacation together in Aspen. However, the parents get stuck in an endless timeshare presentation, and Stan is forced into an 80s' movie.
- Bebe's breasts begin to develop, and the boys are at a loss to explain why they are suddenly drawn to her, when they had no interest in her before.
- Stan becomes distracted from the upcoming football game because his dog is gay, so he turns to the gayest man in town for advice, Big Gay Al.
- Rob Reiner comes to town to lead an anti tobacco crusade after the boys briefly take up smoking.
- Butters' mother snaps and tries to kill her son after the revelation that her husband frequents gay bath houses.
- Chef and the children learn that Earth is actually just a reality show for other planets. When they learn it is to be canceled, the boys travel to a distant planet to plead their case to the network executives.
- Cartman mistakenly believes he is a psychic, and is recruited by the police to help them with investigations.
- The boys get snowed in at the hospital while waiting to learn the identity of Cartman's father. Meanwhile, the townspeople resort to cannibalism when they get snowed in.
- Eric Cartman goes on a quest to find out who his father was. But when he learns who his mother slept with matters get complicated... because she slept with everybody in town.
- Cartman is sent to juvenile hall after he throws a rock at a black child.
- Cartman inherits a large sum of money and uses it to purchase his own amusement park. His resulting success causes Kyle to lose faith in God.
- The boys organize a music festival to raise money when Chef is sued by a record company.
- Chef protests the racist South Park flag.
- Hollywood big-shots try to turn South Park into another Sundance. However, they wreak havoc on the town's eco-system, which could cause Mr. Hankey to die.
- Kyle needs a kidney transplant, and Cartman is the only suitable donor. Meanwhile, Mr. Garrison writes a novel.
- Mr. Barbrady goes back to school after it is discovered that he is illiterate. As he learns to read, a criminal is on the loose molesting all the chickens in South Park.
- The kids get hooked on a brainwashing violent cartoon from Japan which turns them against the American government.
- When the boys kick Cartman out of their band, he teams with Tolkien and Butters to form the greatest Christian rock band ever, "Faith +1".
- As their school bus teeters over the edge of a cliff, the boys recall past memories.
- Stan builds a clubhouse so he can play truth or dare with Wendy. Meanwhile, he deals with his parents' unexpected divorce.