Robert Cornthwaite credited as playing...
Lawyer Springer
- [Springer calls his "surprise" witness to the stand]
- Springer: Your full name, sir?
- Gaylord Patie: Gaylord Patie.
- Springer: And what is your occupation?
- Gaylord Patie: I'm a certified public accountant for the state.
- Springer: Now then, I understand that you, Mr. Patie, have heard the organ playing in the Simmons Mansion. Am I correct, sir?
- Gaylord Patie: You are. I have heard organ music coming from the tower of the Simmons Mansion on three seperate occasions.
- [gasps of awe come from the audience]
- Gaylord Patie: That's why I came to you, Mr. Springer.
- Springer: And at what time did you hear this music?
- Gaylord Patie: At the stroke of midnight.
- [more gasps of awe come from the audience]
- Springer: And what else have you heard coming from the Simmons Mansion, Mr. Patie?
- Gaylord Patie: On the first occasion, a woman's scream. And on the second and third occasions, a man's scream.
- [even more gasps of awe come from the audience]
- Springer: And what kind of screams were they, Mr. Patie?
- Gaylord Patie: Oh wild, maniacal screams.
- [audience is really excited now]
- Springer: Thank you. Your witness.
- Whitlow: [cross-examining] Mr. Patie, I understand that you're president of the Internation Conclave for Unidentified Flying Objects
- Gaylord Patie: That is correct, sir.
- Whitlow: Where was your last meeting held?
- Gaylord Patie: On Mars.
- [courtroom erupts in laughter]