Andy Pforsich: Schroeder

A Boy Named Charlie Brown

Schroeder

Lucy Van Pelt: Wait! Hmm... Brush this guy back, Charlie Brown! Give 'im the ol' bean-ball!
Charlie Brown: No, I can't do that... It wouldn't be right.
Lucy Van Pelt: It wouldn't be right?
[to Frieda]
Lucy Van Pelt: Listen to who's gone moral on us all of a sudden! Ol' Wishy-Washy here is too moral to throw a bean-ball!
Frieda: What about the way the early settlers treated the Indians? Was that moral? How about the Children's Crusade? Was that moral?
Patty: Yeah, and how about those awful movie ads you see nowadays?
Frieda: Do you call those moral, Charlie Brown?
Schroeder: Do you think that incident at Harper's Ferry was consistent with morality?
Patty: Define "morality"!
Frieda: Our whole system of freeways is a perfect example of what I'm trying to say!
Violet: Have you listened to radio lately?
Pig Pen: How about this whole conservation situation?
Charlie Brown: We never win any ball games, but we sure have some interesting discussions.

Schroeder: Alright, Charlie Brown, let's get our signals straight. One finger will mean the high straight ball, and two fingers will mean the low straight ball.
Charlie Brown: What about my curveball? And my slider? And my knuckleball? And my sidearm? And my submarine pitch?
Schroeder: One finger will mean the high straight ball, and two fingers will mean the low straight ball.
[Charlie Brown grimaces]

Schroeder: [after going over their pitching signals, he walks away then turns back] Hey, what's this? What are all these dandelions doing on your pitchers mound?
Charlie Brown: They grew there, and the girls won't let me get rid of them. They say they look pretty.
[Grimacing]
Charlie Brown: And they say I look cute standing among them.
Schroeder: [Starts walking back, the stops and looks again and smirks] They're right. You do look kind of cute standing there.
[Then suddenly starts running away as Charlie throws his shoes, glove, and finally the ball at him. The last of which hits him in the back of the head]

Schroeder: Charlie Brown? Charlie Brown, it's taking you too long to get dressed after every pitch. If you can't dress a little faster, we'll *never* get through the first inning.