Episode list

The host for the episode is Elliott Gould, and the musical guest is Anne Murray. The skits for this episode are as follows: A quartet of dead musicians perform a piece. Elliott Gould sings during his opening monologue. Gilda Radner and Elliott profess their love for each other through the course of the show and get married. A housewife is caught off guard when a couple of workmen come to destroy her home. The Godfather talks about his feelings about the Tattaglia family in a group therapy session. A commercial presents Shimmer, a combination floor wax and dessert topping. Gary Weis presents a film on lounge singers performing "Misty". A family is trapped in their home by a swarm of killer bees, but before the matter can be resolved the cameras suddenly go off-balance. Forcing Lorne Michaels to confront a drunken control-room director. Albert Brooks presents a film about using audience research to judge his work. Two American Indians speak at a press conference to give their views on stereotyping. During the Weekend Update, Laraine Newman comments on toxic nerve agents, while Chevy Chase once again gets lost on his way to a story. Anne Murray performs "Long Distance Call" and "Boogie With You".

The host for the episode is Buck Henry, and the musical guests are Bill Withers, Toni Basil and The Blues Brothers. The skits for this episode are as follows: A suicide hot-line operator tries and fails to prevent a caller from killing himself. Buck Henry gives a self-effacing speech during the opening monologue, while notices superimposed on the screen tell the real story. A man orders a sandwich at a restaurant run by a samurai. President Ford learns of a new campaign strategy to make him look more intelligent. A speed-reading course is presented that helps people read faster, but not better. A sequel to Citizen Kane is presented in which a reporter investigates Kane's other last words. A mechanic tells his daughter nothing but automotive bedtime stories. Gary Weis presents a film with Buck Henry looking for the funniest person on the streets of New York. Michael O'Donoghue does an imitation of Michael Douglas with needles in his eyes. A spokesman for the American Constipation Society discusses the social pain that constipation causes. During the Weekend Update, Chevy Chase once again gets lost while tracking down a story, while a guest commentator rails against masturbation. Bill Withers performs "Ain't No Sunshine". Toni Basil performs "Wham Re-Bop Boom Bam". The Blues Brothers perform "King Bee".

The hosts for the episode are Peter Cook and Dudley Moore, and the musical guest is Neil Sedaka. The skits for this episode are as follows: A bomb squad is called in to investigate a mysterious package, but unfortunately does not defuse it in time. A casting director for a new Tarzan movie is faced with an aspiring actor auditioning for the lead role, despite having one leg. A maximum-security prison holds auditions for a production of Gigi, in which several of the inmates perform songs they've prepared. Don Pardo presents a luxury vacation plan from inside an elevator. A reporter interviews the owner of the Frog and Peach restaurant about their choice of cuisine. Gary Weis presents a film about novelty store items. A British version of Sonny & Cher sing their own rendition of "I Got You Babe" that turns nasty. A reporter conducts an interview with a male-impersonator actress named Sheila. A team of doctors decides to harvest a body for organs after their patient dies, even though the patient is raising protests. Matthew interviews a shepherd who saw the Baby Jesus for the new Gospel he's working on. During the Weekend Update, Chevy Chase gets a wrong number while trying to reach an Angolan prison, Emily Litella gets confused over Soviet Jewelry, and Laraine Newman conducts interviews in the street on the topic of abortion. Neil Sedaka performs "Breaking Up is Hard to Do" and "Lonely Night".

The host for the episode is Dick Cavett, and the musical guest is Jimmy Cliff. The skits for this episode are as follows: Garrett Morris uses voodoo to get Chevy to fall down. Commercials attempt to draw students into The Dick Cavett School of Auto Refinishing and The Dick Cavett School of Hydroplane Operation. An accounting firm talks about just how far they'll go to lower their customers' tax bills. Dick Cavett does his version of "Our Town" about New York City, a swell place where crime is rampant and nothing works. Betty Ford gives a personal advice talk where she compares life's problems with dancing. Gary Weis presents a film about a tailor and a plastic surgeon altering each other. An author pitches his new book about pimping in Nebraska. For the Weekend Update, one of the reporters finally reaches Angola, where she is accosted by horny mercenaries, and Emily Litella expresses her displeasure over the Eagle Rights Amendment. Jimmy Cliff performs "The Harder They Come," "Many Rivers to Cross" and "Wahjaka Man".

The host for the episode is Peter Boyle, and the musical guest is Al Jarreau. The skits for this episode are as follows: A restaurant customer in 1929 Chicago asks the waiter to park his car for him, sending the man into the St. Valentine's Day Massacre. Peter Boyle sings a love song to his girlfriend for the opening monologue, oblivious to the fact that she's making out with another man. The Samurais decide to get divorced and must go about splitting their assets, as well as dividing custody of their daughter. Three little girls lip-sync a Natalie Cole song. A pair of drugged-out hippies invite their neighbor in after he receives some of their mail. Ricardo Montalban pitches a new car that seems to be falling apart. The Bees take on the Wasps in a tag-team wrestling match. A reporter interviews "Mr. X", Richard Nixon in disguise, over his new activities. Gary Weis presents a film of children reciting the Pledge of Allegiance. Two Brando impersonators have a quote duel. A woman convinces her suspicious husband that all the men he finds in their house are actually household appliances. Garrett Morris recites an obscene valentine for a shocked Gilda Radner. For the Weekend Update, Chevy Chase comments on Patty Hearst and the Winter Olympics, while Emily Litella rants about money spent on canker research. Al Jarreau performs "We Got By" and "Somebody's Watching You".

The host for the episode is Desi Arnaz, and the musical guest is Desi Arnaz, Jr. The skits for this episode are as follows: President Ford receives a word-association test from his psychiatrist that ends with him falling over. Desi Arnaz gives his opening monologue, in which he thanks the cast for the special cigars they gave him. Prisoner Ruben Carter talks about how he gets recognized in prison now because of his National Express card. A man receives consoling from his friends when his 40th birthday doesn't go as he had hoped. Vampire Luciana Vermicelli shares her beauty tips. Desi Arnaz recites Jabberwocky in a very heavy Cuban accent. Desi and his son share some of the initial failed ideas that were proposed before "I Love Lucy" was picked up by the network. An extremely white man named Very White attempts to perform a love song in a soul club. A gangster's wife, named Lucy, gives her husband the wrong gun. Lucy shares some of her more extreme costume ideas with Ethel before sneaking into Ricky's club. A Cuban acupuncture doctor uses cigars on his patients instead of needles. Lucy talks about the new book that her husband has coming out. Jane Curtain shares an important moment in American lesbian history. Desi Arnaz and Desi Arnaz, Jr. perform "Cuban Pete" and "Babalu".

Guest host Jill Clayburgh plays a crusading guidance counselor. Great Moments in Herstory celebrates women. Mr. Bill makes his first appearance. Leon Redbone and Andy Kaufman add to the fun.

The host for the episode is Anthony Perkins, and the musical guest is Betty Carter. The skits for this episode are as follows: Chevy Chase delivers a long and rambling monologue in which he berates critics who claim the cast deliberately wastes time to fill up a 90-minute time slot. In his opening monologue, Anthony Perkins attempts to dispel the common perception that he is creepy, only to finish by eating a fly. President Ford shares his thoughts on marijuana usage. A new dominatrix cleaning service tries to whip lazy housewives into shape. Norman Bates pitches his new school of hotel management, only to be interrupted by his unseen mother. During the weekend update, John Belushi ponders why lions and lambs were chosen to represent March weather and what greater significance they may have, while Emily Litella gets upset over calls to preserve natural race horses. A student complains to her teacher about getting a literal Bee as her grade. A set of movie trailers advertise low-budget horror films in the style of Psycho. Other skits include land scarcity and intra-office extramarital romance. Betty Carter performs "Music, Maestro, Please", "Swing Brother Swing" and "I Can't Help It".

The host for the episode is press secretary to President Ford Ron Nessen, and the musical guest is Patti Smith. The skits for this episode are as follows: The opening act features a return of the dead string quartet. Ron Nessen's opening monologue includes a message from the actual President Ford. An ad for the Bass o' Matic promises a new way for viewers to enjoy bass. Nessen asks the president for permission to appear on a new comedy show, then briefs his boss on his daily schedule. A string of jam advertisers pitch products with increasingly disgusting names, since they must taste good to sound so repulsive. A number of skits feature historic figures like Catherine the Great, Oedipus and Thomas Jefferson. During the Weekend Update, Emily Litella becomes upset over presidential erections. Gary Weis presents a film about the dumps that handle New York's garbage, and the men who work there. An ad pitches new Autumn Fizz carbonated douche. Billy Crystal performs a stand-up routine about the old-time jazz greats he used to know. Re-run ads pitch graffiti wallpaper and Try-hard batteries. Patti Smith performs "Gloria" and "My Generation".

Lorne Michaels tries to lure the Beatles onto the show. Baba Wawa makes her first appearance.

The host for this episode is Madeline Kahn, and the musical guest is Carly Simon. The skits for this episode are as follows: Ronald Reagan attempts to demonstrate that he's in tune with modern black culture, only to get punched out by the musician he keeps inadvertently insulting. A preview for the upcoming series, Wilderness Comedian, presents a man who does stand-up comedy for animals. Baba Wawa attempts to interview Marlene Dietrich, but neither can understand what the other is saying. At a slumber party, several girls are disgusted by the thought of how babies are made. A spokesman for impoverished families in Namibia asks people to please donate their fondue sets. The Bride of Frankenstein gets up from her slab and sings "I Feel Pretty". During the Weekend Update, Emily Litella wonders why everyone is upset over violins on television. Pat Nixon drunkenly writes her memoirs about Richard's nervous breakdown during his final days in the White House. Madeline Kahn performs "Lost in the Stars" and Carly Simon performs "You're So Vain" and "Half a Chance".

The host for the episode is Dyan Cannon, and the musical guests are Leon & Mary Russell. The skits for this episode are as follows: Chevy Chase, lying on his back after a tremendous fall, is informed that the control room clock was running fast and he'll have to do it all again to get it on air. During her opening monologue, Dyan Cannon confesses to a lifelong dream of being swept off her feet by a man on a white horse, and during the rest of the show, different male cast members attempt to re-interpret its meaning to make themselves her dream man. A woman takes a taste test to see which is better: a new diet soda or a glass of phlegm. Participants in a hearing test don't notice that their teacher has been taken hostage by a pair of wanted criminals. A husband catches her wife having an affair, but the woman and her lover make up an outrageous story to explain everything. A Bulgarian travel agent attempts to convince a woman to vacation in Bulgaria. During the Weekend Update, a man claims to have a new version of Howard Hughes' will. Anita Bryant attempts to pitch Florida orange juice while being held hostage in Beirut. A priest tries to deliver a funeral eulogy, but is interrupted by a bad case of hiccups. Roy Waddmaker attempts to sell bathwater of the stars. A soldier gets berated by his drill sergeant for repeatedly flubbing his lines in a recruitment ad. A teenage girl is hoping to make an impression on her dream date, but her parents discover that her date is actually three Hell's Angels. In an home movie, a hubcap thief gets caught up in his work and dragged around town by an oblivious driver. Leon and Mary Russell perform "Satisfy You" and "Daylight"(with John Belushi as Joe Cocker).

The host for the episode is Buck Henry (his second appearance), and the musical guest is Gordon Lightfoot. The skits for this episode are as follows: Chevy Chase announces that because he broke his ankle accepting his Emmy Award, his fall will be done by Laraine Newman, but Laraine instead shoves him off the stage. Buck Henry is supposed to come on for his opening monologue, but is nowhere to be found; after a frantic search, the crew discovers that the security guards don't recognize him and won't let him in the building. Lounge singer Peter Lemon advertises a mood ring that changes color as he sings. The samurai tailor performs alterations on a customer's suit. The host of a call-in show tries to get more controversial when nobody calls him. A restaurant owner invites guest to try his all-toad cuisine. During the Weekend Update, the Patty Hearst trial is reenacted with fruit. Lorne Michaels repeats his offer to the Beatles, adding another $200 to the deal. Baba Wawa interviews film director Lina W. Gary Weis presents a film of Buck Henry interviewing people shopping for toilet seats. Jane Curtain interviews the author of a new sex book, only to find he is painfully shy. Garrett Morris sings "An Die Musik" and Michael O'Donaghue does an impression of Tony Orlando and Dawn with needles stuck in their eyes. Gordon Lightfoot performs "Summertime Dream" and "Spanish Moss".

The host for the episode is Elliott Gould (his second appearance), and the musical guests are Leon Redbone (his second appearance), Harlan Collins and Joyce Everson. The skits for this episode include scenes inside a wax museum and a European poker player, as well as a presentation by Shirley Temple Black. Re-run ads inform viewers how they can join the fast-paced life of stand-by operators, and asks America to show their guns. A doctor warns a woman that she's been neglecting the proper care of her uvula. The crew of The Enterprise faces their final foe: network executives coming to announce that the series has been canceled. During the Weekend Update, Emily Litella lends Chevy Chase a hand in reading the news after one of the stories flops. An ad pitches the new Vibramatic personal massager for tense muscles. The Bees put on a performance of The Honeymooners. Leon Redbone performs "Shine On, Harvest Moon" and "Walking Stick" and Harlan Collins & Joyce Everson perform "Heaven Only Knows".

The host for the episode is Louise Lasser, and the musical guest is The Preservation Hall Jazz Band. The skits for this episode are as follows: John Belushi and Chevy Chase have an argument over how the opening to the show should be done. After Louise Lasser's opening monologue, General Idi Amin comes on to warn viewers about the importance of checking oneself for V.D., using himself as an example of the effects of advanced-stage syphilis. In a parody of Swedish films, a couple involved in a secret affair fool death by sending him out for a pizza. An advertisement pitches potholders made from human hair. Chevy Chase presents the Weekend Update, with a special segment on Olga Korbut. Two teenage girls discuss the hazards of dating with a padded bra and whether they'd want to see a guy naked. The Preservation Hall Jazz Band performs "Panama".

The host for the episode is Kris Kristofferson, and the musical guest is Rita Coolidge. The skits for this episode are as follows: Kris Kristofferson sings "Help Me Make It Through The Night" after Chevy Chase falls out of bed, where he was with musical guest Rita Coolidge. After Kris' monologue, secretary Sherry Norwalk talks about how she got a job at SNL helping the writers come up with ideas by having sex with them. The Samurai general practitioner treats one of his patients. Jesse Owens presents a set of commemorative medals honoring white athletes. A clip from a new TV show called Police State is shown, about two cops in Los Angeles who respond to every call by killing anyone they encounter and then talking about where to go eat. Kris Kristofferson talks about how viewers can overcome the handicap of a good education to become successful country music stars. Kris gets reunited with the original Bobby McGee, only to find that she's now become a straight-laced suburban housewife married to a jealous handbag salesman. A woman gets set up for a blind date, only to discover that the date is her gynecologist. Two tramps wait around for a mysterious philosopher named Pardo. Kris Kristofferson performs "I've Got a Life of My Own", Rita Coolidge performs " Hula Hoop", and together they perform "Eddie the Eunuch".

The host for the episode is Lily Tomlin (her second appearance), and the musical guest is James Taylor. The skits for this episode are as follows: For the opening skit, everyone is waiting around for Lily Tomlin to arrive, but she shows up late and announces she's not going to bother rehearsing for the show. After Lily's opening monologue, she begins talking about what she really thinks of the show, thinking that her microphone is off. President Ford gets into a strange debate with Jimmy Carter. During the Weekend Update, Laraine Newman reports on an outbreak of Legionnaire's disease and Emily Litella wonders about crustaceans hijacking airplanes. Ernestine the operator talks about why phone service is unreliable and why they don't care. A housewife is persuaded to perform a series of increasingly bizarre stunts. Lily finishes the show performing The Antler Dance with the SNL band. James Taylor performs "Shower the People", "Road Runner" and "Sweet Baby James".

The host for the episode is Norman Lear, and the musical guest is Boz Scaggs. The skits for this episode are as follows: Chevy Chase, in the hospital after injuring himself in the previous episode, coaches Gilda Radner through the opening via telephone. Norman Lear gets to hear what the actors in his shows really think of him. Jimmy Carter discusses lust in his heart and looks forward to more lusting as president. Norman Lear reviews the pilot of a new show about a family of snake handlers in Pittsburgh. During the Weekend Update, Jane Curtain discusses the Ford-Carter debate, Patty Hearst's sentencing, Elton John's sexuality and the sex lives of nuns, while Laraine Newman reports from Times Square for the upcoming Jewish New Year. The women of SNL sing a get-well song for Chevy, wishing he would fall for them. A spokesman from the U.S. Council of Standards and Measures talks about the advantages of switching over to metric time. A divorce lawyer gets rough with his client while trying to make her claims sound believable. Boz Scaggs performs "Low Down" and "What Can I Say?"

The host is Eric Idle, and the musical guests are Joe Cocker and Stuff. The skits are as follows: A Chevy Chase impersonator attempts to do the opening fall. Eric Idle starts to perform a song, but is convinced by Jane Curtin to put it off until the end of the show. A young couple discusses assembling their new child with the help of a geneticist who presents them with bizarre options. A DJ attempts to work two stations simultaneously, maintaining opposite personas for each one. Baba Wawa talks to America about why she's leaving NBC. During the Weekend Update, Jane discusses the Norton-Ali fight, while Garrett Morris reports on the circumcision of Michelangelo's David. The Rutles trick Lorne Michaels into giving them the money for the Beatles reunion. Dan Aykroyd and Eric Idle dress up in drag, only to be told by John Belushi that American audiences don't find it funny. Dan and Eric begin drag racing, running around the studio in women's clothing. Jacques Cousteau talks about the care and feeding of fish, pouring all sorts of items into his fish tank. Ken Norton insists that he's a better boxer than Ali, despite losing the close-fought match. Erica Viedonagen ponders whether comedians from outer space visited Earth in the past. Two college guys talk about their math test while playing Pong. Joe Cocker performs "You Are So Beautiful" and "Feelin' Alright" (with John Belushi). Stuff performs "Foots".

The host for the episode is Karen Black, and the musical guest is John Prine. The skits for this episode are as follows: Chevy Chase returns after his injury and is pushed out of his wheelchair by John Belushi. Karen Black talks about her son and great mothers in history during her opening monologue. Baba Wawa interviews Indira Gandhi. Ford and Carter have another unusual debate. A re-run ad pitches amazing new triple-bladed razors. Amish crime fighters help out victims when catching crooks quickly isn't a priority. A wife feeds her husband Green Cross cupcakes since they're guaranteed not to cause cancer. Catherine the Great takes her horse as her new lover. A high school loser meets up with a former cheerleader at the lunch counter at Woolworth's and completely fails to make a good impression. Mr. Bill goes to a party where he suffers a variety of physical abuse. John Belushi sings "One for the Road" while a caption lists the number of crimes he's committed. John Prine performs "Hello in There" and "The Bottomless Lake". Karen Black sings "Ten Cents a Dance".

The host for the episode is Steve Martin, and the musical guest is Kinky Friedman. The skits for this episode are as follows: The coach of the Yankees consoles his team after losing the World Series, and one of the players gives him their final decision. Chevy Chase attempts to make an endorsement for milk, but keeps adding in its less pleasant effects. An episode of Jeopardy from 1999 gives a look at some social changes in the future. During the Weekend Update, Chevy comments on Jimmy Carter's cross-dressing, the latest election poll results, a mafia funeral in a pizza oven, and a gorilla crashing an airplane. An ad features a new combination watch and German Shepherd. Several counter-culture acts perform in a late-50's beatnik café. Jane Curtain interviews the author of a book analyzing the connection between sexual activity and sports performance. Mary Tyler Moore gets murdered by Ted before their newscast as a prank. A new diet plan works by stranding dieters out in the wilderness with an Eskimo who steals their food. Kinky Friedman performs "Dear Abbie".

The host for the episode is Buck Henry (his third appearance), and the musical guest is The Band. The skits for this episode are as follows: The land shark makes its return, pretending to be a late trick-or-treater. In his opening monologue, Buck Henry praises the cast for being able to perform so professionally in light of how absolutely messed up their personal lives are. The samurai stockbroker loses one of his clients after a string of bad advice. Baba Wawa has a joint interview with First Ladies Betty Ford and Rosalynn Carter. Garrett Morris discuss his own roots, including some famous ancestors. Ford and Carter have another debate, this time in the form of a beauty pageant. During the Weekend Update, Chevy Chase presents some campaign ads that haven't been used yet, while Jane Curtain announces that Chevy will soon be leaving the show. A warlock pitches the new Bat-o-Matic potion maker. Ambassador Thorne searches for the real parents of Damien, the son of Satan. Garrett gives a report from the grave of Houdini for the 50th anniversary of his death and sees a ghost. Mr. Mike tells a bedtime story about a little Eskimo boy who freezes to death. The Band performs "Life is a Carnival", "The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down", "Stage Fright" and "Georgia On My Mind".

The host for the episode is Dick Cavett (his second appearance), and the musical guest is Ry Cooder. The skits for this episode are as follows: The Chroma-Trak girl gets her colors mixed up during broadcast. Dick Cavett fields questions from the audience during his opening monologue. John Dean looks back on Nixon trying to frame him for Watergate. During the Weekend Update, Laraine Newman reports on the death and cremation of Smokey the Bear. A marine walks down the street, looking to pick up a few good men. A psychiatrist makes house calls. The Bees talk about how they were able to overcome discrimination. Mr. Mike tells a bedtime story about a blind chicken. A pair of scientists look into the question of why some words are funnier than others. Ry Cooder performs "Tattler" and "He'll Have To Go".

The host for the episode is Paul Simon (his second appearance), and the musical guest is George Harrison. The skits for this episode are as follows: George Harrison feels that he should receive the $3000 Lorne Michaels promised the Beatles for appearing on the show, while Paul Simon has doubts about the costume he's been asked to wear. Paul Simon starts to sing "Still Crazy After All These Years" dressed as a turkey, but gives up halfway through and tells Lorne he won't do it. A housewife raves about mineral-packed Quarry cereal. Baba Wawa interviews Henry Kissenger. During the Weekend Update, Jane Curtain reports on contraceptives, expenditures by the Carter campaign, Morris the Cat's attempted suicide, and a new strain of gonorrhea. Rod Serling presents an episode of the Twilight Zone in which three actresses end up in a motel room with a television show presenter. A violent renegade named Billy Paul fights racism at an ice cream parlor. Paul Simon performs "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover", "Something So Right" and "Bridge Over Troubled Water". Paul Simon and George Harrison perform "Here Comes the Sun" and "Homeward Bound". George Harrison performs "Crackerbox Palace" and "This Song".

The host for the episode is Jodie Foster, and the musical guest is Brian Wilson. The skits for this episode are as follows: Gilda Radner opens the show to explain why she won't be appearing much, while caption explain that she's been fired. Jodie Foster explains in her opening monologue that she's treated just like every other guest even though she's just 14. Chevy Chase advertises convenient feedbag dinners. Two Bees come into a girl's room claiming they're Peter Pan and Tinkerbee. Jodie demonstrates the new Puberty Helper to get teens through their awkward years. A man tries to get through the security gate at the airport, but his personal fetish causes a problem. An SNL fan is interviewed on why he likes the program. A schoolgirl with a crush on her teacher tries to say goodbye for the summer. For his 50th birthday, the cast re-enact the life of Don Pardo. A man is shocked to discover that his wife of six years isn't black. Mr. Mike tells Jodie a story about a little train that died. Brian Wilson performs "Back Home", "Love is a Woman" and "Good Vibrations".

The host for the episode is Candice Bergen (her third appearance), and the musical guest is Frank Zappa. The skits for this episode are as follows: For the opening, Patty Hearst enjoys a Christmas back with her family. Instead of doing her opening monologue, Candice Bergen hides in her dressing room and has to be coaxed out by John Belushi doing a Humphrey Bogart impression. President-elect Carter admits he can't follow through on all the things he promised during the campaign. A pitchman convinces a woman to use Santi-Wrap before sitting on the lap of a disreputable Santa. Irwin Mainway defends the safety of his company's obviously unsafe toys. A re-run ad promotes saving money with your own pricing gun. A woman defends her right to be extremely stupid. During the Weekend Update, Jane Curtain's husband urges her to quit SNL and come home, after which Jane comments on Amy Carter, Olga Korbut's marriage and the killing of Rudolph the Reindeer, while Emily Litella doesn't think people should give money to unisex. Candice advertises an instant camera that dispenses cheese slices. Two police officers investigate a string of murders perpetrated by trees. Candice announces that John has no place to spend Christmas and asks someone to adopt him for the holiday. The cast perform a song hoping that Gary Gilmore gets his wish to be executed as soon as possible. Frank Zappa performs "The Slime", "Lagoon" and "Peaches & Regalia".