Alan Cox credited as playing...
John Watson
- John Watson: [after a hallucination involving food] Yes, Mister French Pastry. I have nothing whatsoever to say to you. I trust you have nothing to say to me.
- Ehtar: [suddenly appears above them gun in hand] HOLMES!
- Elizabeth Hardy: [screams] NO
- [jumps in front of Holmes as Ehtar fires]
- Ehtar: [snarls as she fatally takes the bullet] DAMN!
- John Watson: [bewildered] Where you going? Holmes You'll Be Killed
- Sherlock Holmes: [growling as he snatches up a sword] I'm going to get him
- [shouts]
- Sherlock Holmes: Ehtar! You're nothing but a damn fraud!
- Ehtar: [smugly] And you, Holmes, are letting your emotions get the better of you again!
- [fires again but Sherlock dodges the shot]
- John Watson: My name is...
- Sherlock Holmes: Wait - let me. Your name is James Watson. You're from the north of England, your father is a doctor, you spend a considerable amount of leisure time writing, and you haver a particular fondness for custard tarts. Am I correct?
- John Watson: My name isn't James, it's John.
- Sherlock Holmes: James, John - what's the difference?
- John Watson: A great deal.
- Sherlock Holmes: Very well, so your name is John. How did I do on the others?
- John Watson: You were correct. On every count. How is it done? Is it some sort of magic trick?
- Sherlock Holmes: No magic, Watson. Pure and simple deduction. The name-tag on your mattress reads "J Watson". I selected the most common name that begins with "J" - "James". "John" would have been my second choice. Your particular style of shoes are not made in the city. I've only encountered them once before during a brief visit to the north of England. The middle finger of your left hand is indented with a callus, the trademark of a writer. You were carrying the Hunter's Encyclopedia of Disease - a handbook not available to the general public, only to practising physicians. Since someone of your ages obviously hasn't been to medical school, I concluded that it was given to you by an older person, someone very dear to you who is concerned for your health: Your father, the doctor.
- John Watson: And the custard tarts?
- Sherlock Holmes: Simple. There's a distinct stain of yellow custard on your lapel. That particular colour of custard is used in the making of custard tarts, and your shape convinced me you've eaten many of them before.
- John Watson: There's no need to be rude.
- Sherlock Holmes: You're sitting in a room with an all-southern view. Suddenly, a bear walks by the window. What colour is the bear?
- John Watson: Red! The bear is red!
- Sherlock Holmes: Why on Earth would the bear be red?
- John Watson: The southern sun is very hot. The bear would be terribly burnt!
- Sherlock Holmes: [laughs] That is the most absurd answer I've ever heard.
- John Watson: Dudley is going to pay dearly for this. Punch to the jaw, jab to the ribs...
- Sherlock Holmes: Now, now, Watson. Revenge is sweetest when it's served up cold. Come on.
- [Dudley enters with snow-white hair]
- Dudley: Holmes. You did this. You're responsible, aren't you?
- Sherlock Holmes: So that's where I dropped my chemistry experiment: into your tea. Oh, don't worry, old chap. It'll wear off shortly. You should be back to normal - by summertime.
- John Watson: I can't afford to jeopardise my medical career!
- Sherlock Holmes: Weasel.
- John Watson: I'm not a weasel. I am... practical.
- Sherlock Holmes: Weasels *are* practical. And I imagined you courageous and stout of heart.
- John Watson: I am courageous. And I'm stout of heart. It's just that... oh, all right. I'll do it.
- Elizabeth Hardy: [giving Waxflatter's deerstalker hat to Holmes] Uncle would have wanted you to have this.
- John Watson: Put it on!
- [Holmes puts it on and Watson and Elizabeth start laughing]
- John Watson: On second thoughts, take it off! It looks very silly!
- Cragwitch: [hallucinating, Cragwitch attacks Holmes and tries to strangle him] EH TAR! You filthy murderer! You wanted to kill all of us! Well, you won't kill me!
- Sherlock Holmes: Watson! Speak to him!
- John Watson: What? Oh! Your... your name is Craddy Critchwit! I mean, your name is Ch-...! Your name is...! What's his name?
- Sherlock Holmes: [Choking] Cragwitch!
- John Watson: Amazing, Holmes. Simply amazing. Of course, you did forget one very important clue.
- Sherlock Holmes: Oh? Please enlighten me.
- John Watson: Well, "Rathe" is "Ehtar" spelled backwards.
- Sherlock Holmes: Very clever, Watson. Well, I'm certain I would have arrived at that conclusion sooner or later.
- John Watson: [smiling] Sooner or later.
- [while flying]
- Sherlock Holmes: I've just realised something.
- John Watson: What?
- Sherlock Holmes: I have absolutely no idea how to land this machine.
- [Holmes, Watson and Elizabeth are walking across the courtyard, when a voice causes them to look up]
- Waxflatter: Holmes! Elizabeth! I think I have solved all of the problems!
- John Watson: [looking up] Who's that?
- Elizabeth Hardy: My Uncle.
- Sherlock Holmes: Rupert T. Waxflatter. Retired schoolmaster, degrees in Chemistry and Biology, well versed in Philosophy, Mathematics and Physics. Author of 27 books.
- [Holmes walks on]
- Elizabeth Hardy: And most people think he's a lunatic.
- [Elizabeth walks on]
- John Watson: Why?
- [Waxflatter launches his flying machine]
- John Watson: Oh, my God!
- [Holmes, Watson and Elizabeth help Waxflatter carry the wrecked flying machine up the stairs to the attic]
- Waxflatter: Let me see, that makes six! Six failed attemps. Nevertheless, we shall not be defeated. We shall conquer. I have made up my mind. The conquest of the skies is well within my grasp!
- John Waston: [to Elizabeth] He's done this six times!
- [Over dinner, the student are discussing what they will do in later life]
- John Watson: I want to be a doctor.
- Dudley: Nobody asked you!
- John Watson: Sorry!
- [in order to obtain information about the blowpipe, Watson is forced to make a purchase from a curiosity shop]
- Sherlock Holmes: Why on earth did you buy a pipe?
- John Watson: It looks distinguished!
- Sherlock Holmes: It looks perfectly ridiculous!
- John Watson: You'll see. I shall learn to smoke it and then you can't laugh. You'll see.
- [Mrs Dribb has locked Holmes and Watson in an upstairs room]
- John Watson: I always suspected that becoming a friend of yours would end in disaster!
- [the trio have found a wooden pyramid]
- John Watson: Holmes, there's a door here!
- [turning to Elizabeth]
- John Watson: Fancy him missing a door!
- [Sherlock Holmes is about to get into the carriage outside the school]
- John Watson: Are you coming back after the holidays?
- Sherlock Holmes: No. There are too many memories here.
- [he looks up at what used to be Elizabeth's window]
- John Watson: Holmes, you have your entire life ahead of you.
- Sherlock Holmes: And I'll spend it alone.
- John Watson: Holmes, wait! I know why the bear is white!
- Sherlock Holmes: And why is that, Watson?
- John Watson: Well, the only room with an all-southern view would be at the North Pole. It's a polar bear!
- Sherlock Holmes: Bravo, Watson. You have the makings of a great detective.
- John Watson: [to Holmes] Well, I knew it. This is the end of my medical career. My father's going to be furious. I always knew that making friends with you would end up in disaster.