Peter DeLuise credited as playing...
Officer Doug Penhall
- Busdriver: Hey, hey, hey, hey. Where's your bus pass?
- Off. Doug Penhall: [as Doug McQuaid] My dog ate it.
- Off. Tom Hanson #2: [as Tommy McQuaid] I got the same dog.
- Off. Doug Penhall: This guy is the worst burglar I've ever seen. He's drunk.
- Off. Tom Hanson #2: Hammered.
- Off. Doug Penhall: Pickled.
- Off. Tom Hanson #2: To the gills.
- Off. Doug Penhall: [after being awaken in the middle of the night by Hanson] Why didn't you call?
- Off. Tom Hanson #2: You wouldn't have let me in.
- Off. Doug Penhall: I know. Why didn't you call?
- Off. Doug Penhall: They're gonna have fireworks, free hot dogs. Even Sprinkles the clown!
- Off. Tom Hanson #2: Sprinkles? Really?
- Off. Doug Penhall: Oh! Oh! You're not supposed to be watching that. Where's the babysitter?
- [Clavo points to the door where Doug hears giggling from inside the bedroom. Doug knocks]
- Off. Doug Penhall: Hey! You've got five seconds to get your clothes on and get out of there before I light your friggin' underwear on fire. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
- [the babysitter and her boyfriend run half-naked out the door]