Sean Astin credited as playing...
Billy Tepper
- Henry "Hank" Giles, III: This had better not be mouthwash.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Trust me.
- Henry "Hank" Giles, III: [after drinking] Trust me... Asshole, this *is* mouthwash!
- William "Billy" Tepper: No, it's not.
- Ricardo Montoya: It tastes like mouthwash. What the hell is it?
- William "Billy" Tepper: Four parts 100 proof Vodka. Two parts Peppermint Schnapps for that *mouthwash* flavor and one part Crème de Menthe to make it green.
- Joseph "Joey" Trotta: There's one of them at the end of the hall.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Yeah?
- Joseph "Joey" Trotta: So we make some noise and we get him in here and then we jump him.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Then what?
- Joseph "Joey" Trotta: Billy. He's got a fucking machine gun. With a fucking machine gun we can shred these fuckers.
- Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: You know, this machine gun stuff must run in Mafia families.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Great, the school gets taken over by terrorists and I'm still on pots and pans.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Gentlemen, here's to Mr. Donohugue.
- Joseph "Joey" Trotta: Yes, to Phil. May he get laid while on the outside.
- Jennifer: Oh, tell me what you look like.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Uh, well... I've got blonde hair, and um, I wear an earring in my left ear, I'm about 5'9", 150 pounds... did I mention I'm black?
- Jennifer: You sound very sexy, Steve. I like long, blond hair on a black man. I've also got long, blond hair. I'm not black, but I'm very, very tan. I'm wearing black lace bra and panties that feel really *hot* against my skin. Would you like me to take my bra off?
- William "Billy" Tepper: Yes. yes, please.
- Luis Cali: My father sent me to a school that looked a lot like this one. A military academy in Pennsylvania. Perhaps you've heard of it. The Armitage School.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Yeah, sure.
- Luis Cali: You really have no sense of discipline, do you?
- William "Billy" Tepper: Look, I'm sorry about the shower thing and I promise...
- [Cali forces him onto the desk and pulls out a metal pointer]
- William "Billy" Tepper: Oh, God.
- Luis Cali: This is how they taught ME discipline! And believe you me, I LEARNED!
- [beats him with the pointer]
- Luis Cali: What does your father do, William?
- William "Billy" Tepper: He's a contractor.
- Luis Cali: According to this he owns the third largest construction company in the world.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Yeah, he's a contractor.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Come on man, get up. We've gotta strike back or I'm going to look like a douche bag in front of the entire school.
- Joseph "Joey" Trotta: You were born looking like a douche bag.
- Frank Ingram, Guard: Dean's waiting for you guys back in your room.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Pleasure knowing you.
- William "Billy" Tepper: All right, what now?
- Derek 'Yogurt': All right, all right. Very, very carefully take the red chip out of the receiver.
- William "Billy" Tepper: There is no red chip.
- Derek 'Yogurt': There must be.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Well I'm sorry, there isn't. There's a blue chip the same size as the red chip, but there's no red chip.
- Derek 'Yogurt': That must be it then.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Well is it, or isn't it?
- Derek 'Yogurt': I don't know.
- Henry "Hank" Giles, III: Mouthwash?
- William "Billy" Tepper: Yes, mouthwash... but maybe not.
- Henry "Hank" Giles, III: What's the deal, Billy? Are you trying to tell me my breath stinks?
- William "Billy" Tepper: I wasn't saying your breath stinks. Why do you take everything so personally? Damn, Hank.
- William "Billy" Tepper: If you're going to kick me out, kick me out. Don't make me look like a nark to my friends.
- Dean Parker: If we expelled you that would make four prep schools in four years. Are you trying for the Guinness Book of Records?
- Dean Parker: I'm not going to expel you. Three schools have done that and it's obviously done nothing for your character... I'm going to do much worse. I am going to keep you here until you graduate. It'll probably take years at this rate.
- William "Billy" Tepper: I might wear you out before then.
- Dean Parker: Oh don't you worry about wearing me out. I'm going to wear you out.
- [after saving the school]
- William "Billy" Tepper: Does this mean I'm off pots and pans?
- Dean Parker: Oh no, you're not getting off that easy.
- William "Billy" Tepper: You're fuckin' morons. You know that don't you? You're fuckin' morons.
- Ricardo Montoya: That's why we hang with you Billy.
- William "Billy" Tepper: What kind of stuff do they have?
- Student: What do you mean? What stuff?
- William "Billy" Tepper: Guns, grenades, that kind of stuff.
- Student: Man, they've got tons of it, all kinds. A big machine gun... Wait a minute. I'm not going to get in trouble for this, am I?
- William "Billy" Tepper: Don't be a wuss.
- Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: Oh yeah, that's wonderful. Now all we have to do is get Cali out of the Headmaster's Office which he hardly ever leaves, sneak past the guard, switch the chips without setting off them bombs, and then get out without being seen.
- William "Billy" Tepper: That's right. That's it exactly.
- Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: I was attempting to be sarcastic.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Well you shouldn't have been. You should have been writing it down.
- William "Billy" Tepper: They're going to shoot five kids if I don't go back.
- Military Officer: They're going to shoot you if you do go back.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Jeez-Louise, Yogurt, you sound like we're trying to defuse a bomb or something.