Tom Kenny credited as playing...
Heffer Wolfe • Additional Voices • Chuck Chameleon • Mr. Smitty • Fran the Newscaster • Really Really Big Man • Bloaty the Tick • Flecko • Dad Elf • Narrator • Newscaster • Peaches • Singer • Wallace • Al • Alligator • Alligator Sales Clerks • Announcer • Announcer #1 • Antique Dealer • Attorney • Bartender • Black-Masked Conglomo Golf Course Worker • Blood Brother #1 • Buff Guy • Bugs • Bunny Man • Captain Compost Heap • Chuck • Chuck Roast • Clerk • Crewman • Crod • Dice-Footed Step • Dr. Bendova • Dr. Katz • Dr. Phil • Driver • Ed's Nephew • Edgar • Educational Film Narrator • Elf Fan • Filburt - singing • Fly Delivery Man • Frank Hutchison • Frog • GI Jimbo Customer • Goat • Heffer • Hospital Beavers • Joyce • Lolita • Love Seat Host • Madame Doreno • Mortimer Kahn • No Tell Motel Receptionist • Norburt • Nuclear Swan Fan • O-Town Inspector • Pilot • President Banana • Retch • Rob • Rob's Friend • Sal Ami • Scientist • Sheriff • Shop Teacher • Ski Rental Guy • Slippy • Smiley-Faced Guy • Squirrel • Step 2 • Television Announcer • The Dark Underlord • The Hopping Hessian • The Monkey Guy • Tiger • Tour Guide • Turtle • Two-Patch Crappy Jack • Tyrone • Udder #1 • Uncle Gib Hootsen • Veterinarian • r
- Crappy Jack: Arr, and then, I heard a scream so loud it could be heard down in Davy Jones' locker. Mickey Dolenz's locker too, and Peter Tork's locker. All the Monkees had lockers...
- Heffer: I'm starving. What's the biggest thing on the menu?
- Cashier: That would be our Knockwurst Nightmare Platter, 570 pounds of ground pig parts packed tightly but tantalizingly into over two miles of intestinal tubing. No-one has ever finished the Nightmare Platter.
- Heffer: I'll take two.
- Cashier: There aren't enough pigs in the country, sir.
- Peaches: I am the Dark Underlord, the Prince of Doom, the King of Eternal Torment! I am Pain! I am Evil! They call me... Peaches!
- Peaches: This is a 1954 McSpirit Spectervision 3000, and it belongs to me! Do you know what that makes it?
- Heffer: Um... I give up.
- Peaches: It's the TV from Heck!
- [Heffer and Peaches laugh]
- Heffer: Wait a minute. Heck? Isn't it supposed to be...
- Peaches: [Covers Heffer's mouth] Censors! And here's the lamp from Heck, and the pineapple from Heck...
- Heffer: I love it when people say that.
- Heffer: [after finding Rocko in the dumpster, his nail-biting problem out of control] All this toe-chewing is making me hungry. Let's go get some chili!
- Heffer: Through the use of sophisticated computer technology, and a box of crayons, we have constructed a likeness of Dingo today.
- Crappy Jack the Sailor: I turned leeward in time to witness the full sail yardarm give way and came crashing down on my midshipman's hind quarters. He let out a scream that could be heard all the way down in Davy Jones' locker. Micky Dolenz's locker too, and Peter Tork's locker. All the Monkees had lockers.
- Anchorman Fran: Now to Fran at the courthouse. Fran? Thanks, Fran. Well, this may very well be the trial of the century, and the question on everyone's mind is: What the heck is Rocko? Is he some kind of dog?
- Kangaroo: I think he's a rabbit.
- French Guy: A rabbit.
- Spunky: You're asking *me*?
- Anchorman Fran: Everyone seems to have an opinion. Excuse me... may I ask you something?
- Heffer: [in disguise] Umm... Me llamo Francior!
- Filburt: [in disguise] And I don't speak English!