Kieran Culkin credited as playing...
Kevin Dillon
- Kevin Dillon: Every word is part of a picture. Every sentence is a picture. All you do, is let your imagination connect them together. If you have an imagination that is.
- Kevin Dillon: Oh, so you're a pacifist.
- Maxwell Kane: A what?
- Kevin Dillon: A pacifist. "Pass on the fists"? Get it?
- [pause]
- Kevin Dillon: Right, it's not my best material.
- Kevin: Guess what I got for Christmas, Mr. Kane.
- Kenny Kane: Well I don't know...
- Kevin: A squirt gun, and a chemistry set. Good old reliable H2SO4, sulfuric acid. Oily, colorless, and able to strip the paint off a car in 2 seconds. So ask yourself, do I feel lucky today?
- Kevin: Think of it as a business partnership: you need brains, and I need legs - and the Wizard of Oz doesn't live in South Cincinnati.
- Maxwell Kane: Why am I always the one who ends up knee deep in crap?
- Kevin Dillon: Just think of it as Close Encounters of the Turd Kind.
- Kevin: An Ornithopter is defined as an experimental device, propelled by flapping wings.
- Gwen: That's a big word for a mechanical bird.
- [shifting her voice]
- Gwen: Congratulations, Mrs. Dillion. It was a tough delivery, but you've given birth to a healthy 7-pound dictionary.
- [smiling]
- Gwen: You must be very proud.
- Maxwell Kane: I really don't like rats!
- Kevin: Well, somewhere down there, a rat is saying, I really don't like Max.
- Maxwell Kane: [referring to Kevin's homemade squirt gun] What did you *really* put in that thing?
- Kevin: Oh, just some soap, and vinegar, and chili pepper.
- Kevin: It's the treasure, concealed in the slime of dragons.
- Maxwell Kane: It's a woman's purse, and it's covered with crap.
- Kevin: A band of highwaymen ambushed the queen of Saxony in the north road. They stole her chest, no pun intended.