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  • Warning: Spoilers
    Having recently watched Joe D'Amato's riff on INDECENT PROPOSAL, I was more than ready for his take on BASIC INSTINCT. It's one of the most densely plotted of his hardcore movies, and almost drew me in, thanks do a decent cast. I have to admit it would have to be far better than an Al Bradley XXX rendition of STARSHIP TROOPERS.

    This is one of Joe's fake-American projects in conjunction with the well-named Snatch Productions, so there's plenty of American talent in the mix. Bobby Vitale gets the Michael Douglas role, a police detective who thinks with his dick. He's forced to see a department shrink because of his prior drunkenness and rape (while drunk) of a woman.

    Shrink Julie is played by fan fave Kaitlyn Ashley wearing a black wig, and oddly billed as "Katleex Asly" (yuck!). Of course the wig is a clue, hint/hint, nudge/nudge.

    For some reason known only to Big Joe and his incompetent scripter "Robert Lyon", this INSTINCT is non-violent. Instead of being murdered, the opening scene protagonist Valentino merely disappears after being humped, handcuffed to the bed, by a busty blonde whose face is not shown.

    Vitale is partnered with failed young actor Walter McDillon, fresh from his starring role in D'Amato's IRREPARABLE DAMAGE, a silly riff on Louis Malle's DAMAGE. I really feel sorry for this guy, who needs an E! channel biography of his non-career. At any rate, all-American boy Walter manages to mangle his dialog pretty badly here.

    Superstars Jonathan Morgan and Sean Michaels are also on the force, bossing our heroes around. Chief suspect is busty blonde (natch) Rhonda, played by Sindee Coxx. Typical D'Amato sloppiness has her character name changing from scene to scene and back again at least half a dozen times: I heard Rhonda Welshbourne vs. Rhonda Welchpool interchangeably. Perhaps this is a ploy to keep the viewer awake between sex scenes.

    In the Sharon Stone role Coxx is brought to headquarters for an interrogation, and manages to perform the legs uncrossing beaver shot twice for the fans. D'Amato plays this like an unexpurgated sketch on Saturday Night Live.

    Of course Coxx seduces Vitale and has sex with him in handcuffs, nicely staged in a weight room (reminding me of a classic T.T. Boy/Viviana staging, lost in the VHS to DVD transition which has been most unkind to the spectacular early '90s star Miss V.).

    Vitale is suspended for physically attacking Kaitlyn at police headquarters, but he's back on the case after partner Walter disappears following his being seduced by a busty blonde lady.

    SPOILER ALERT:

    Film's climax is quite amusing, as after some sleuthing and almost clever tying up of plot loose ends Vitale finds half the cast (all of them "missing") in bondage, tied to pillars in a wine cellar. I thought maybe Francis Coppola would be revealed to be the culprit, but no, all clues lead towards Kaitlyn, who by way of sloppy direction and poor storyboarding has disappeared entirely from the film a few reels back, never to return.

    Not to worry, everybody celebrates with an orgy in the wine cellar, which is fortunately outfitted with mattresses just for that purpose. Michaels and Valentino gang up on a pretty brunette for mixed combo action. Trick/false ending plays around with the phony wigs motif again, not bad for low-level porn.

    This junk is so much better than the usual XXX-er by D'Amato that it's a shame that more care was not exerted in order to result in a real film. Instead it's plenty of sex plus nonsensical attempts at characterization and convoluted plotting.