Larisa Oleynik credited as playing...
Bianca Stratford
- Walter Stratford: [Bianca and Chastity are sneaking past Bianca's father] Shoulda used the window!
- Bianca: Hi Daddy!
- Walter Stratford: Hi... where're we going?
- Bianca: Well, if you must know... a small study group of friends.
- Walter Stratford: Otherwise known as an orgy?
- Chastity: Mr. Stratford, it's just a party!
- Walter Stratford: And hell is just a sauna.
- Walter Stratford: This morning, I delivered a set of twins to a fifteen-year-old girl, do you know what she said to me?
- Bianca: "I'm a crack-whore who should have made my skeazy boyfriend wear a condom"?
- Walter Stratford: Close, but no. She said, "I should have listened to my father".
- Bianca: She did not.
- Walter Stratford: Well, that's what she would have said if she wasn't so doped up!
- Bianca: But she's a mutant! What if she never dates?
- Walter Stratford: Then you'll never date. Oh, I like that.
- Kat Stratford: You don't always have to be who they want you to be, you know?
- Bianca: I happen to like being adored, thank you!
- Bianca: [after Kat has told her that she went out with Joey] How is it possible that I did not know about this?
- Kat Stratford: I warned him that if he told anyone, the cheerleading squad would find out how tiny his dick is!
- Walter Stratford: Do you know what happens at proms?
- Bianca: Yes. We'll dance, we'll kiss, we'll come home. It's not quite the crisis situation you imagine.
- Walter Stratford: Kissing? That's what you think happens? I've got news for you. Kissing isn't what keeps me up to my elbows in placenta all day long.
- Bianca: Can we, for two seconds, ignore the fact that you're severely unhinged and discuss my need for a night of teenage normalcy?
- Walter Stratford: What's normal? Those damn... Dawson's river kids sleeping in each other's beds and whatnot?
- Bianca: Daddy that is so not...
- Walter Stratford: I've got news for you. I'm down, I've got the 411, and you are not going out and getting jiggy with some boy, I don't care how dope his ride is. Mamma didn't raise no fool.
- Bianca: People expect me to be there!
- Walter Stratford: Kat's not going, you're not going!
- Bianca: Why can't you be normal?
- Kat Stratford: Define normal.
- Bianca: Bogey Lowenstein's party is normal.
- Walter Stratford: What's a Bogey Lowenstein?
- Kat Stratford: Bogey's party is just a lame excuse for all the idiots at our school to drink beer and rub up against each other in hopes of distracting themselves from the pathetic emptiness of their meaningless...
- Bianca, Chastity: ...meaningless, consumer-driven lives.
- Kat Stratford: joey never told you that we went out did he?
- Bianca: yeah ok...
- [disbelieving]
- Kat Stratford: in ninth, for a month
- Bianca: why?
- Kat Stratford: [sarcastically] because he was like... such a babe
- Walter Stratford: I know who you wanna bend the rules for. It's that hot-rod Joey.
- Bianca: What's a hot-rod?
- Bianca: Where did you come from? Planet "Loser"?
- Kat Stratford: As opposed to Planet "Look At Me, Look At Me"?
- Bianca: Can we for two seconds ignore the fact that you're severely unhinged and discuss my need for a night of teenage normalcy?
- Walter Stratford: What's normal? Those damn Dawson's River kids, sleeping in each other's beds and whatnot?
- Bianca: Can't you just find some blind, deaf retard to take you to the movies so I can have one date?
- Kat Stratford: I'm sorry. Looks like you'll just have to miss out on the witty repartee of Joey "eat me" Donner.