James DeBello: Trip

Detroit Rock City

Trip

[Trip calls Lex's mom a dyke]
Lex: Just because she's a female gynecologist, doesn't mean she's a lesbian. And even if she was, at least my mom didn't give birth to me while she was on LSD.
Trip: 'Shrooms!

[Trip is kicking the walls of the washroom]
Lex: Take it easy man. This is the girls crapper, remember?
Trip: Aw, wake up Lex! We just watched Jam's mom torch our fucking KISS tickets man! Not REO Speedwagon, not Journey, not The Bay City Rollers. KISS, man! If you can think of a better reason to trash a girl's bathroom I'd sure like to hear it.

Jam: It's a teenage girl walking along the side of the highway. I mean, they, they, they make scary movies that start out like that.
Trip: Hey, but, but they make porno movies that start out like that too, man.

Chongo: This guy giving you shit, bro?
Little Kid: Yeah, he was going to mug me for my KISS ticket.
Trip: What! That's insane, I said "Hey, little kid, you know where I could take a piss?"

Christine: Hey, you know what? Disco's so fucking big right now, I wouldn't be suprised if KISS did a disco song.
Lex: Man, if there's one thing KISS will never do, it is a bullshit disco song.
Jam: No shit man!
Trip: Yeah man. Disco blows dogs for quarters man!

Lex: [Voices, and Faces inside Trip's head as He contemplates robbing a store] I can't believe you're thinking of robbing a store, Trip. I mean, You don't pass go, and collect 200 Dollars for pulling Stuff like this, Man.
Hawk: No shit, Man, is this really worth it? Still, You're gonna get Your ass kicked nine ways to Sunday by that fucking Gorilla, but I guess it's still a Hundred Times better than getting it Porked for the next Three to Five, right?
Jam: What about that Girl Trip, She'll never forget this Night. Even if You got away with it, She'll be Scarred for Life, I mean, when are You gonna realize some Day, that being Tough, means being Tender?
Trip: [Aloud] Alright everybody, just Shut up!
[All the Customers look at Trip questionably, as Trip fakes a Cough]

Trip: [looks at Jam, dressed in nerdy clothes] Man, that geek looks just like Jam.
Lex: Man, that geek *is* Jam.
Hawk: [yells across the campus] HEY, DORK!
[Jam flips them off, they all start laughing]

Hawk: [Waiting to bust Jam out of St. Bernards] Come on, man. This is such a lousy view. How the hell are we ever supposed to know when he's lit?
Trip: It usually takes ten minutes to a half an hour. All depends, you know?
[loud laughing]
Trip: He's lit!

Trip: Whoa, man. I just had the killer-est vision, man. Imagine Mystery, openin' up for KISS, man.
Lex: Oh, that'd be fuckin' IT, man!
Trip: It could happen, man. it could happen!
Jam: You know, in '73, KISS was opening for Blue Oyster Cult. One year later, to the day, man, Blue Oyster Cult was opening for KISS.
Lex: Yeah, well, we're not gonna be openin' for anyone until our lead singer gets over his stage fright.
Hawk: [scoffs] Man, I don't have fucking stage fright, man!
Lex: Then why'd you pass out at Bing's party before the first fucking song?
Hawk: That was one show, man!
Lex: Yeah, that was our only show, and you dropped like a dead deer on us!
Hawk: Shut up, man.

Trip: So who did your wardrobe? A band of preppy sailboat captains?
Jam: Hey, my mom had me over a barrel, alright? After what happened last night I had to let her *dress* me today!
[Huffs]
Jam: It's a give-and-take relationship.
Lex: Yeah, she gives you shit, and you take it!
Hawk: Jam, give me the tickets, man, I wanna hang on to them.
Jam: The... tickets?
Hawk: What?
Jam: you see, there's a little, *little* problem with that. They're still at my house in Trip's jacket.
Hawk: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
Jam: She was standing right over me while I was changing, for fuck's sake!
Hawk: Jam, you are so pathetic, man!
Trip: That is some sick shit right there! What, does she comb your ass hair for you too?
Lex: Jam, if she even smells those tickets, she'll destroy 'em, and we get fucked outta seein' KISS for the third year in a row!
Jam: They're fine, they're at my house, they're perfectly safe. We can go there right after school and pick 'em up. My mom's not even gonna be there!
Trip: Dudes, hours from now, we're actually gonna be seein' KISS!
Hawk: All right, man. We'll just double time it to your house, and grab the tickets before heading to the train station for the 3:45 to DETROIT... ROCK... CITY! GOD!
[Bell rings]
Hawk: Well, as they say in the tampon biz, see you next period.
[slams locker door]

Trip: Just one more day of school to get through, girlies, before tomorrow night, Cobo Hall, Detroit, Michigan! You wanted the best...
All Boys: You got the best! The hottest band in the world... KISS!
[exhale loudly, imitating the sound of a screaming crowd]

Hawk: [three Stellas are walking by] I wish somebody would tell these girls that *DISCO'S DEAD!*
Stella 1: Don't stare too long, boys, you'll go blind!
Lex: Yeah, right! Stellas. I hate Stellas almost as much as I hate dogs.
Trip: Yeah, man. Same species when you stop to think about it, man!