Mills Lane credited as playing...
Mills Lane • God • Millsius Lanus • Self
- Mills Lane: All right, young ladies, this is a fight to the death. Now death may not be something you two have thought about, so let me just explain...
- Mary-Kate Olsen: [interrupting, to Ashley] I hate you!
- Ashley Olsen: I hate you more!
- Mary-Kate Olsen: You're stupid!
- Ashley Olsen: You're stupider!
- Mills Lane: [breaking up the girls' slapping match] Ladies, I haven't even started the fight yet!
- Mary-Kate Olsen: She started it!
- Ashley Olsen: No, she did!
- Mills Lane: [giving up after they try and hit each other] On second thought... just go ahead and get it on!