Eric Szmanda credited as playing...
CSI Greg Sanders • Lab Tech Greg Sanders • Greg Sanders
- Greg Sanders: All work and no play makes Greg a dull boy.
- Gil Grissom: All play and no work makes Greg an UNEMPLOYED boy.
- [liquid from the trunk of a car containing two corpses splashes up onto Greg's face and into his mouth]
- Sara Sidle: Technically, that makes you a cannibal. Grissom would be proud.
- Greg Sanders: Grissom would have tasted it on purpose.
- Greg Sanders: Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall, ninety-nine bottles of beer. Swab one down, run it through CODIS, ninety-eight bottles of beer on the wall.
- Zach: You know how it is, you look like you were a jock in college.
- Greg Sanders: Me?
- Sara Sidle: Him?
- Greg Sanders: I, am a genius.
- Warrick Brown: Let me guess, you ran the DNA and got a hit?
- Greg Sanders: No.
- Gil Grissom: You ran the DNA and something distinctive came up?
- Greg Sanders: No.
- Warrick Brown: You rolled out of bed and managed to dress yourself?
- Greg Sanders: No.
- Nick Stokes: [Greg opens a cupboard and pulls out a book] I thought that's where you kept your porn.
- Greg Sanders: I move it around.
- Gil Grissom: I just got a page from James Watson.
- Nick Stokes: And I got one from Francis Crick. What's going on, Greg?
- Greg Sanders: Well, as you both know, Watson and Crick are the granddaddies of DNA. Without their discoveries, I'd have nothing to do all day.
- Nick Stokes: What have you been doing all day?
- Gil Grissom: So, let's see. You surf, you scuba dive. You're into latex, you like fashion models and Marilyn Manson. And you also have a coin collection?
- Greg Sanders: Weird, ha?
- Gil Grissom: Well, I race cockroaches!
- Greg Sanders: Hey Catherine, you think Sara would go to dinner with me?
- Catherine Willows: Sure, as long as you don't tell her it's a date.
- [Grissom walks by the lab where Greg is playing music]
- Gil Grissom: Hey, Sanders, no punk rock.
- Greg Sanders: What about Black Flag?
- Gil Grissom: Are you nuts?
- Greg Sanders: Bringing back a semen sample... I analyzed this and found your DNA.
- Nick Stokes: That was quick.
- Greg Sanders: No jokes about my being fast in this department.
- Nick Stokes: Hah.
- [after telling Grissom something that Grissom already knows]
- Greg Sanders: I guess I should stop trying to impress you.
- Gil Grissom: That would impress me.
- Catherine Willows: So, any luck with the blood and hair samples I gave you?
- Greg Sanders: Don't insult me. Luck is only for those without skill.
- Catherine Willows: Spoken like a man who's never hit the jackpot.
- Greg Sanders: Sad, but true.
- Catherine Willows: [looking at a surveillance video of a teenage boy in an elevator] You crack this kid's head open, all that would come out would be T&A.
- Greg Sanders: I think you said that about me once.
- Catherine Willows: Actually, more than once.
- Gil Grissom: Where's your enthusiasm?
- Greg Sanders: Whenever I find a match in here, my world gets a little smaller. Out there I felt large.
- Gil Grissom: Out there means a pay cut.
- Greg Sanders: I'm not about the money.
- Greg Sanders: [about orthodontia] I had it all - palate expander, braces, retainer, headgear. Five years of torture, but worth every penny, don't you think?
- Greg Sanders: I had to send this to an outside lab since we're not equipped to carry out bacterial DNA analysis. Hint, hint.
- Sara Sidle: I think this print dust is getting to me. Would you mind finishing up the fridge?
- Greg Sanders: Do I get a gold star?