Shaquille O'Neal credited as playing...
Shaq
- [first lines]
- Shaquille O'Neal: [screaming] Help! Help! Am I dead?
- Dr. Phillip C. McGraw: You're not dead. You've been taken against your will.
- Shaquille O'Neal: Kobe?
- Shaquille O'Neal: [Trying to saw through his chains] AHHH! This will never work.
- Dr. Phillip C. McGraw: Of course, he wants us to cut through our feet.
- Shaquille O'Neal: You go first.
- Dr. Phillip C. McGraw: Bullshit!
- Shaquille O'Neal: Yeah, you're probably not man enough. I guess your momma was right.
- Dr. Phillip C. McGraw: Never!
- [Holds up saw]
- Dr. Phillip C. McGraw: Who's the coward now, momma?
- [Starts cutting through his foot]
- [Dr. Phil successfully cuts off his foot]
- Shaquille O'Neal: Oh, my God!
- Dr. Phillip C. McGraw: I did it. We're saved.
- [Shaq points at the sawed off foot]
- Dr. Phillip C. McGraw: What's wrong?
- Shaquille O'Neal: Wrong foot.
- Dr. Phillip C. McGraw: Motherfu...
- [faints]
- Shaquille O'Neal: Dr. Phil? What the hell's going on?
- Dr. Phillip C. McGraw: I don't know. I was doing a show on teens with abandonment issues and suddenly, I woke up here. Man, those kids are gonna be pissed.