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Rob Schneider, David Spade, and Jon Heder in The Benchwarmers (2006)

Nick Swardson: Howie

The Benchwarmers

Nick Swardson credited as playing...

Howie

Photos5

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Quotes7

  • Howie: For years I thought the sun was a monster. But I am here to tell you that it's not a monster! IT'S NOT A MONSTER!
  • [cries]
  • Howie: Richie told me about the serial killers thats loose in in our neighborhood killing anyone named Howie! THAT'S MY NAME! That's my name!
  • Howie: I used to think the sun was evil but now I know it's not.
  • Wayne: How's the moon treating you.
  • Howie: Not a fan.
  • Howie: [quivering] Carlos?
  • Carlos: Who say my name?
  • Howie: [gives him 2 packs of beer and a tequila] I brought you a present from the Benchwarmers. You're really good at baseball.
  • Carlos: [happy] Thank you Albino.
  • [bold]
  • Carlos: Now get lost!
  • Howie: [cowers away screeching]
  • Howie: What's going all the way?
  • Wayne: [whispers in Howie's ear]
  • Howie: Oh.
  • [squeezes suntan lotion and screams]
  • Howie: Aaaaaah!
  • Clark: We could still win this thing.
  • Richie: Wha-how?
  • Clark: If we use the force.
  • Richie: Let's try not to be too geeky, Clark.
  • Clark: The Force is powerful, my young padawan.
  • Howie: He's right. It is.
  • Howie: Richie?
  • [hands out a bottle of urine]
  • Richie: Okay, buddy.
  • Clark: Is that apple juice?
  • Richie: Nooo.

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