David Schwimmer credited as playing...
Dr. Ross Geller
- Roger: Maybe you wanted your marriage with Carol to fail.
- Ross: No. Why would I why. No. Why.
- Roger: Siblings. You fail at something so your sibling will look better in the eyes of your parents.
- Ross: I don't think that Monica's failures...
- Monica: Oh, so I'm a failure now is that it? I'm a bigger failure than you, is that right?
- Ross: Hey, I married a lesbian to make you look good.
- Rachel Green: [waitressing] Okay! You guys want anything else?
- Chandler Bing: Oh, yes! Can I have one of those...
- Rachel Green: No, I'm sorry, we're all out of those. Anybody else?
- Roger: Did I - Did I say something...
- Chandler Bing: Nah, she's still upset 'cause I saw her boobies.
- Ross: Huh, what? What did-? What were you doing seeing her boobies?
- Chandler Bing: It was an accident. It's not like I was across the street with a telescope and a box of doughnuts.
- Rachel Green: Okay, okay, can we change the subject, please?
- Phoebe Buffay: Yeah, hello, these are not her 'boobies', these are her breasts.
- Rachel Green: Okay, Pheebs, I was hoping for more of a change.
- Chandler Bing: You know, I don't know why you're so embarrassed. They were very nice boobies.
- Rachel Green: Nice? They were 'nice'? I mean, that - that's it? I mean, mittens are 'nice'.
- Rachel Green: [noticing Chandler staring at her chest] Why can't you stop staring at my breasts?
- Chandler Bing: What?
- [looks up]
- Chandler Bing: What?
- Rachel Green: Did you not get a good enough look the other day?
- Ross: Alright, alright. We're all adults here, there's only one way to resolve this. Since you saw her boobies, I think, uh, you're gonna have to show her your pee-pee.
- Chandler Bing: You know, I don't see that happening?
- Rachel Green: Come on, he's right. Tit for tat.
- Chandler Bing: Well, I'm not showing you my 'tat'.