Christopher Masterson credited as playing...
Francis
- Francis: [Francis is on the phone to Dewey] How did she die?
- Dewey: Cats ate her face.
- Francis: Dewey, I think you're confused. I'm asking about Aunt Helen.
- Dewey: Cats ate her face.
- Francis: Put Mom or Dad on the phone.
- Hal: [Dewey hands the phone to Hal] Hello?
- Francis: Dad, what happened to Aunt Helen?
- Hal: Cats ate her face. Here, Dewey knows more about it than I do.
- [hands the phone back to Dewey]
- Lois: Francis, I can't talk to you right now. We're on our way to Aunt Helen's funeral.
- Francis: Aunt Helen died?
- Lois: Well, I sure hope so. We're going to her funeral.
- Francis: Well, when did she die? Mom, why didn't anybody tell me?
- Lois: We didn't want to have to worry you over nothing.
- Francis: Nothing? She's dead. How's Uncle Fred taking it?
- Lois: I don't think he's thought too much about it. He died about two months ago.
- Lois: Look, Francis, I guess I get scattered. You know, sometimes I forget what I told you and you're not here, so...
- Francis: I'm not there because you sent me away. I swear, I'm not even a part of this family anymore.
- Lois: Francis, it's very important that you understand that is not true, but I don't have time right now.
- Francis: Oh, I understand. It's not like it's a matter of life and death. Oh, wait, it is! Anyone else die in the last five minutes I should know about?
- Lois: Francis, You wanna know everything that's been happening? Your father mowed the lawn, Reese polished off all the cereal and I dropped a frying pan on my foot and I got a big black mark. You want me to send a picture?