Melissa Joan Hart credited as playing...
Sabrina Spellman
- Sabrina Spellman: Look, I made us a... "first day of college, life doesn't get any better than this" breakfast.
- Roxie King: [woken up in the morning] Look, Old MacDonald, I worked very hard to make sure my first class isn't until three. Good day and good night.
- Sabrina Spellman: That's funny, because I totally had you pegged for a morning person.
- Sabrina Spellman: [as Miles prepares cereal] Miles, what are you doing? I made us waffles and bacon and eggs.
- Miles Goodman: Do you have any idea where bacon and eggs come from?
- Sabrina Spellman: Pigs and chicken butts?
- Miles Goodman: Government subsidized farms. They're fed chemicals and hormones. It's not natural. I'm sorry, Sabrina, but my body is my temple.
- Sabrina Spellman: So you're filling it with sacred Sugar Bombs?
- Miles Goodman: They turn the milk purple.
- Sabrina Spellman: [lugging text books] Gotta get one of those book bags with wheels. Or maybe a pack mule.
- Roxie King: What's wrong, Perky? First day of Sabrina's Wonderful Life hitting a brick wall?
- Sabrina Spellman: No, not at all. It's very wonderful. I've only been at college for three hours and already I get to read four chapters of Plato, write a ten-page essay and catch a small arthropod to dissect. Maybe I ought to rethink my definition of the word wonderful.
- Sabrina Spellman: They have parties on Monday night?
- Josh: This is college. They have parties every night.
- [hands Roxie an invite as well]
- Josh: You could leave your names at the door.
- Roxie King: Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! A college party? I'm so excited! Whatever will I wear?
- [shrieks, runs off out the door]
- Sabrina Spellman: I think she was being sarcastic.
- Josh: Yeah, I got that.
- Sabrina Spellman: [Sabrina has returned home to find a morbidly obese Salem lying on her bed] Salem, what happened to you?
- Salem Saberhagen: [about Hilda's pampering and overindulging him] The good life. La dolche vita, baby!
- Sabrina Spellman: I'm surprised that the good life doesn't come in the low fat version.
- Salem Saberhagen: I think *I* carry it well.
- Sabrina Spellman: [about Salem's weight gain] I don't think you can carry it out of this room.