Jerry Seinfeld credited as playing...
Jerry Seinfeld
- [first lines]
- Jerry Seinfeld: The big new accessory with eyeglasses seems to be that strap that connects in the back so you can take 'em on and off. Which I don't get, because I thought if you have glasses, isn't that because you need to wear glasses? You need glasses. Isn't that what they say? I mean, an eye doctor doesn't say, "Would you care for some glasses?" When people have crutches, they don't have like a little chain attached to their belt, so they can just let go of them every now and then. Why not get a toupee with a rubber band for when you're water-skiing?
- Jerry Seinfeld: You don't think I can keep a secret?
- Jerry Seinfeld: No, but he would have read your face.
- George Costanza: You don't trust my poker face?
- Jerry Seinfeld: Do you ever win at poker?
- George Costanza: No.