Jerry Seinfeld credited as playing...
Jerry Seinfeld
- Cosmo Kramer: Great news! Yeah, the strike has been settled. I'm going back to work.
- Jerry: What strike?
- Cosmo Kramer: Yeah, H&H Bagels. That's where I worked.
- Jerry: You?
- Elaine: Worked?
- Jerry: Happy Festivus!
- Cosmo Kramer: What's Festivus?
- Jerry: When George was growing up...
- George Costanza: [interrupts] ... NO!
- Jerry: His father...
- George Costanza: [interrupts] ... Stop it! It's nothing. It's a stupid holiday my father invented. It doesn't exist!
- Elaine: [as she walks into Jerry's apartment] Happy Festivus, Georgie.
- George Costanza: [yelling] God!
- Cosmo Kramer: Frank invented a holiday? He's so prolific!
- Elaine: Oh, I can't believe it! I've lost my "Atomic Sub" card!... Oh no! I bet I wrote that fake number on the back of it when I gave it to denim vest!
- Jerry: So?
- Elaine: I've eaten 23 bad subs, I just need 1 more! It's like a long, bad movie, but you want to see the end of it!
- Jerry: No, you walk out.
- Elaine: Alright, then, it's like a boring book, but you gotta finish it.
- Jerry: No, you wait for the movie!