Tom Kenny credited as playing...
SpongeBob SquarePants • Fish #1 • Fish #2 • Fish #3
- [SpongeBob has shaped himself in the form of Texas to irritate Sandy]
- SpongeBob SquarePants: Hey, Patrick. What am I?
- Patrick: Stupid?
- SpongeBob SquarePants: No, I'm Texas.
- Patrick: What's the difference?
- Sandy Cheeks: Don't you DARE take the name of Texas in vain.
- SpongeBob SquarePants: You mean we can't say anything bad about dumb old Texas?
- Sandy Cheeks: No, you can't!
- Patrick: Well, can we say that people from Texas are dumb?
- SpongeBob SquarePants: [singing] The stars at night are dull and dim whenever they have to be over dumb ol' stupid Texas.
- SpongeBob SquarePants: You used me... for land development! That wasn't nice.
- Plankton: Haven't you figured it out, SpongeBob? Nice guys finish last. Only aggressive people conquer the world. Ha ha ha ha!
- SpongeBob SquarePants: Well... what about aggressively nice people?
- SpongeBob SquarePants: Look, Patrick, I'm Texas: Duh, howdy, y'all!
- Patrick: I'm Texas too: Get a dog, little longie, get a dog!
- Plankton: SpongeBob, don't let that guy sit on you. Assertiveness lesson number one: tell that guy to get off.
- SpongeBob SquarePants: Excuse me. You're sitting on my body, which is also my face.
- Plankton: No, no! Be assertive!
- SpongeBob SquarePants: [sticks his finger on the guy's pocket] Beep-beep.
- Plankton: Not insertive!
- SpongeBob SquarePants: It's a party, for you! We have square dancing
- [shows a fish holding a big cube]
- SpongeBob SquarePants: , barby-cues...
- Squidward: [holding a big Q with spikes on it] Ow. Ow.
- SpongeBob SquarePants: Peas-in-a-can pie
- [shows another fish holding a pie with a can of peas sticking out]
- SpongeBob SquarePants: and our very own ten-gallon hats.
- [He and Patrick put water jugs on their heads]
- SpongeBob SquarePants: So you're staying?
- Sandy Cheeks: I'm stayin'!
- [the crowd cheers]
- SpongeBob SquarePants: That makes me feel all wiggly!
- [Squidward sarcastically mutters "Whoopty-doo" under his breath]
- Patrick: Yeah! Who needs dumb old Texas?
- [the crowd falls silent. All eyes fall on Patrick]
- Sandy Cheeks: [threateningly] What did you just say?
- Patrick: Should I start running now?
- Plankton: You see how wonderful life is... when you're maniacal?
- SpongeBob SquarePants: I thought it was called assertive.
- Plankton: Whatever.
- Plankton: SpongeBob, you missed your chance. You've got to be aggressive to get the things you want. You're too soft.
- SpongeBob SquarePants: But I'm a spon...
- Plankton: Don't say it!
- SpongeBob SquarePants: We're gonna get Sandy now.
- Mr. Krabs: Well, hurry it up, lad! We can't squat like this forever!
- Plankton: Tell that guy you know karate and you'll tie him in a knot if you don't get your metal detector back.
- SpongeBob SquarePants: [to the fish] Hey! I'm going to tie your... shoe if you don't give that back!
- Fish #2: But I'm wearing sandals!
- SpongeBob SquarePants: Okay! Never mind!
- [to Plankton]
- SpongeBob SquarePants: It's all right, Plankton. He's wearing sandals.