- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: I've just been paid a visit from Q.
- Commander William T. Riker: Q? Any idea what he's up to?
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: He wants to do something "nice" for me.
- Commander William T. Riker: I'll alert the crew.
- [Troi aims a bow at a tree, but shoots her arrow into Data's chest]
- Counselor Troi: Data! Are you all right?
- Lt. Cmdr. Data: [pulls the arrow out] The arrow impacted just above my sixth intercostal support, penetrating my secondary subprocessor.
- [wiggles his fingers]
- Lt. Cmdr. Data: Fortunately, none of my bio-functions seem affected. Do not be concerned, Counselor. I believe your aim is improving.
- [Q claims to be indebted to Picard]
- Q: Without your assistance on our last encounter, I would never have survived. I would have taken my own life but for you.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: We all make mistakes.
- Sir Guy of Gisbourne: [to Picard] I'll have you know, I'm the greatest swordsman in all of Nottingham!
- [they fight]
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Very impressive.
- [fighting]
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: There's something you should know.
- [more fighting]
- Sir Guy of Gisbourne: And what would that be?
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: I'm *not* from Nottingham!
- [kills Sir Guy]
- Vash: That's the problem with being such a well-known liar. Even when I'm telling the truth, no one believes me.
- Q: Jean-Luc, it's wonderful to see you again. How about a big hug?
- [he puts his feet up on Picards desk]
- Q: Well, don't just stand there, say something.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Get out of my chair!
- Servant: Oh, you'll wear yourself out with all that pacing, milady.
- Vash: Told you to stop calling me that. The name's Vash.
- Servant: Ooh, my poor lamb. You've got a brain sickness for sure. Oh, can't I get you something to ease your suffering?
- Vash: I could use a drink.
- Servant: Well, I wasn't thinking of spirits, milady, but I have some nice, fresh leeches - to drain the fever.
- Q: I had such high hopes for you, Picard. I thought you were a bit more... evolved than the rest of your species, but now I realize you're just as weak as all the others. Still, it pains me to see the great Jean-Luc Picard brought down... by a woman.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: [alarmed] What woman?
- Q: [chuckles] Don't play coy with me, Captain. I witnessed your little spat with Vash. Nor will I soon forget the look of anguish on your face, the pain, the misery. If I didn't know better, I would have thought you were already married!
- [Picard enters his quarters, where a surprise visitor is waiting for him]
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Vash! How did you get in here?
- Vash: I came in through the window.
- Q: You've never actually been to the ruins at Tagus III, have you?
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: No. They were sealed off more than a century ago.
- Q: Well, that explains it, then. How can you write about something that you've never seen? I know! Why don't I take you there?
- [he changes into an explorer outfit]
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Out of the question. That would mean breaking Taguan law.
- Q: Must you always be so ethical? I suppose we could travel back in time. You could see what Tagus was like two billion years ago. They really knew how to party back in those days.
- [with the help of his men, Picard has rescued "Lady Marian"]
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: If you have hurt any of my people...
- Q: Sadly enough, they're all fine, but my point is, they could've been killed - and so might've you - all for the love of a maid. My debt to you, Picard, is paid. If you've learned how weak and vulnerable you really are, if you finally see how love has brought out the worst in you.
- Vash: Nonsense! You're absolutely wrong. It's brought out the best in him. His nobility, courage, self-sacrifice, tenderness.
- Q: Oh, you're good. You're really good.
- Vash: [of Q] He was right about one thing, you know. As ridiculous as it was, his game did prove that you still care.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: I may not show my feelings to my crew; but I do have them.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: I don't want your help, your advice, your favors, or for that matter, *you*, do you understand? Once and for all!
- Q: You would have me stand idly by as she led you to your destruction?
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Yes!
- Q: As you wish.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: So, where are you off to now?
- Vash: I haven't made up my mind.
- [Q appears next to them]
- Q: After all, she has the entire universe to choose from.
- Vash: Meet my new partner.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Him?
- Vash: Why not?
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: I'll tell you why not!
- Q: Now, Jean-Luc, let's not be unkind.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: He's devious, and amoral, and unreliable, and irresponsible, and... and definitely not to be trusted!
- Vash: Remind you of someone you know?
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: As a matter of fact, it does.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Some other time, Q. Right now, I have other matters to attend to.
- Q: Yes, your speech, I read it. It's dull, plodding, pedantic - much like yourself.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: I think this is supposed to be Earth - somewhere... round about the twelfth century. And this is England, or to be more precise, Sherwood Forest; at least Q's recreation of it.
- Commander William T. Riker: That would explain these costumes.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Quite right, Number One - or... should I say 'John Little'?
- Doctor Beverly Crusher: Well, if he's Little John, that makes you...
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: I know. Robin Hood.
- [Picard, as Robin Hood, has come through the window of the castle to rescue Vash, as Lady Marian]
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: My staff and I were brought here by an old adversary of mine named Q, but I'll tell you the rest of that when we're safe. Come on, we don't have much time.
- Vash: And the others are outside?
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: They're waiting for us back in Sherwood Forest.
- Vash: You... you mean you came here alone?
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: That's right. Now come on!
- Vash: What kind of plan is that?
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: It's an excellent one if you'd just hurry up!
- Vash: You do realize that our lives are at stake here?
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Only too well.
- Vash: And this is the best strategy you could come up with, one man against an entire castle?
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: You have a better one?
- Vash: How about this: you go, I'll stay here.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: And do what?
- Vash: Marry Sir Guy, if I have to.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Well, that's brilliant!
- Q: [on Vash] She's found a vulnerability in you - a vulnerability I've been looking for for years. If I had known sooner, I would've appeared as a female.
- Vash: You must be Commander Riker.
- Commander William T. Riker: I'm afraid you have me at a disadvantage.
- Vash: I didn't mean to interrupt. I believe you were about to tell me that my eyes are as mysterious as the stars.
- Commander William T. Riker: You're Betazoid.
- Vash: Not at all. It's just that Jean-Luc does a very good imitation of you.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: A captain does not reveal his personal feelings to his crew.
- Vash: Is that a Starfleet regulation or did you just make that up yourself?
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard: I'm sorry if you're upset.
- Vash: And I'm sorry if my being here embarrasses you.