- J-Roc: There's two things mo-fuckers gotta know about J to the R O C. Straight up, know what I'm saying? First of all, I spin more rhymes than a Lazy Susan and I'm innocent until my guilt is proven. Peace. Representing Sunnyvale, straight the fuck up.
- J-Roc: Randy you better go on with your perm coupon, know what I'm sayin'? Gut Cassidy and the Sundance Cheeseburger?
- Ricky: My first order of business is to tell the prosecutor to shut the fuck up, and wipe that stupid fucking grin off his face cause it's distraculating my case.
- Ricky: I'd like to make a request under the Peoples Freedom of Choices and Voices Act that I be able to smoke and swear in your courtroom.
- Ricky: Let's go, smokes.
- Prosecutor: But I've only got two left!
- Ricky: I don't care, you've been a dick all morning, it's the least you can do for me.
- Prosecutor: [Tossing smokes] Oh, for the love of God!
- Judge: [Cops in the courtroom trying to smoke too] Just the defendant, please!
- Ricky: [about their illegal gas station] Unleaded, blue container. Supreme, red container. Diesel in the green. Okay, are we clear here, guys?
- Cory: Yeah, but how can you tell which is the Supreme?
- Ricky: What, are you stupid? You fuckin' taste it. Unleaded tastes a little tangy. Supreme is kinda sour, and diesel tastes pretty good.
- Ricky: [to judge] Look, I can't speak without swearing. And I've only got my grade 10. And I haven't had a cigarette since I've been arrested. And I'm ready to fuckin' snap.