Plot

Eric thinks he has cursed his upcoming marriage after catching sight of Donna in her wedding gown; Red looks for a very inexpensive wedding gift.

Red joined Bob at an auction, got drunk and returned with a canoe, spending the money Kitty destined for Eric's wedding present, so she orders him to think of a free, 'better' gift. The canoe is enthusiastically adopted -Kitty won't keep it- by the basement boys, as an original prop for a crazy stunt, even by Kelso's brave standards, and somehow Michael thinks wearing a helmet would be worse. Eric manages to cause drama by ruining Donna's wedding dress in stages, with and without Kitty's help...—KGF Vissers

Red joined Bob at an auction, got drunk and returned with a canoe, spending the money Kitty destined for Eric's wedding present. So, she orders Red to think of a free, 'better' gift. At first Red proposes to gift his old baseball glove, which Kitty says will only remind him that he is not into sports. Then Red tries to gift his war stuff (like his uniform, his medals, his gun, his boots, his canteen) and Kitty says no as the gift cannot be anything that was on or near Red when he killed somebody. Eventually he gifts his years of wisdom (never come home drunk with a canoe)

The canoe is enthusiastically adopted by the basement boys, since Kitty won't keep it or would allow Red to keep it. They take it mount hump and the plan is for Kelso to sit in the canoe and kayak down the mountain side. Kelso plans to use the oar to steer the canoe on land. Fez and Hyde advise him to wear a helmet, which he refuses. Kelso believes that Hyde and Fez want to play a prank on him with the helmet. But the canoe won't budge with Kelso sitting in it. Kelso steps out of the canoe in frustration. Luckily the canoe slides down without him and crashes badly.

The 2nd attempt, Kelso wants to bob-sled in the canoe down the mountain. But he can't get into the canoe in time, and simply ends up falling all the way down the mountain without the canoe. Finally, the trio lug the canoe to the back of Hyde's El Camino and Kelso volunteers to ride in it as Hyde drives it around the city. Red forces Kelso to wear a helmet.

Eric manages to cause drama by ruining Donna's wedding dress in stages, with and without Kitty's help. Eric had sex with Donna in her bedroom and left his jacket in there. He goes to her room later looking for it. At first, he goes into her closet to find his jacket, and finds her wedding dress instead. He manages to rip it and brings it home to Kitty to help fix it. But he puts it down on the dining table which had Red's shoe polish on it, the dress gets a black stain. As Kitty rushes to soak it in detergent, Eric steps on it and causes an even bigger rip. The dress is ruined.

Donna freaks out when she finds the dress missing from her closet. Then Donna comes in looking for her dress and Eric hides it in the fridge. It comes out with another stain. Somehow Kitty repairs the dress and asks Eric to put it in the washer, but Eric puts it in the dryer as well. Kitty arrives just as the dryer cycle completes and the dress comes out all purple gray in color. Kitty is sure Donna will dump his ass.

Eric tells Fez to tell Donna that he took the wedding dress, as he is a pervert. Eventually Donna figures out that Eric ruined her dress. Bob gives her Midge's wedding dress after taking her permission on the phone.