B.J. Novak credited as playing...
Ryan Howard
- Dwight Schrute: And just as you have planted your seed in the ground, I am going to plant my seed in you.
- Ryan Howard: I don't think you know what you're saying.
- Dwight Schrute: [after Ryan gulps down a beer] Just think, that temp agency could have sent you anywhere.
- Ryan Howard: [Stares into the camera] I think about that all the time.
- Dwight Schrute: Brain teaser: I have two coins, totaling 15 cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are they?
- Ryan Howard: A dime and a nickel.
- Dwight Schrute: No. I said one of them is not a nickel.
- Ryan Howard: But the other one is. I've heard that before.
- Dwight Schrute: Okay. A man and his son get into a car accident. They are rushed to the hospital. The doctor says, "There's no way I can operate on this boy, because he's my..."
- Ryan Howard: [cuts him off] "Because he's my son." The doctor is the boy's mother.
- Dwight Schrute: A man is found hanging from the ceiling...
- Ryan Howard: [cuts him off] He stepped on a block of ice, hung himself and the ice melted.
- Dwight Schrute: A hunter...
- Ryan Howard: [cuts him off] It's a polar bear, because you're at the North Pole.
- Dwight Schrute: Damn it!