Bradley Whitford credited as playing...
Danny Tripp
- Danny Tripp: Where is everybody?
- Darius Hawthorne: Well... Tom Jeter's been arrested for assault, and he was taken down to the West Hollywood Police Station to get booked. Simon Stiles loaned him his jacket, which happened to have a half a joint in the pocket, so Simon ran there to make sure Tom wasn't charged with possession. Harriet Hayes is pretty upset because all of this happened while she was heckled by gay hooligans, and Matt Albie's in his office rewriting the Jesus sketch.
- Danny Tripp: Are you pitching me a sketch?
- Darius Hawthorne: No, sir.
- Danny Tripp: Where is everybody?
- Darius Hawthorne: Like I said, Tom...
- Simon Stiles: [entering] Danny.
- Danny Tripp: What the hell is going on?
- Simon Stiles: Tom got arrested. We came out of dinner last night, some guys got in Harriet's face for the gay marriage thing in the Post. Tom tried to break it up, and he pushed one of them and the guy's pressing charges. Tom's wearing my jacket, and it's got a joint in it. He's gonna get searched, if they haven't done it already.
- Danny Tripp: Let's get down there.
- Simon Stiles: He's not there. This is getting out of hand.
- Danny Tripp: Where is he?
- Simon Stiles: In a police van headed to Nevada.
- Danny Tripp: Why?
- Simon Stiles: Because the computer kicked out an outstanding warrant for failure to answer to a speeding ticket he got in a small town called Pahrump. Danny...
- Danny Tripp: Seriously, is this a sketch?
- Simon Stiles: He's being extradited. Where the hell have you been?
- Danny Tripp: Breakfast!