Homer Simpson / Grampa Simpson / Hans Moleman / Groundskeeper Willie / Santa's Little Helper / Barney Gumble / Meek Assistant / Midget Cop / Tweedy Writer / Festival Host / Older Vermont Man / Professor / Goose (voice)
Marge Simpson (voice)
Bart Simpson / Maggie Simpson (voice)
Lisa Simpson (voice)
Moe Szyslak / Adolf Hitler / Carl Carlson / Man at Festival / Audience Member (voice)
Lenny Leonard / Stoner in Audience (voice)
Michael Chabon (voice)
Jonathan Franzen (voice)
J. Jonah Jameson (voice)
Gore Vidal (voice)
Tom Wolfe (voice)
Poet Writers (voice)
Eloise / Maya Angelou / Woman at Festival / Vermont Woman (voice)