Josh Radnor credited as playing...
Ted Mosby
- Robin Scherbatsky: You stole the blue French horn for me.
- Ted: I would have stolen you a whole orchestra.
- Barney Stinson: I'm really sorry about you and Robin. I know I was always joking around about wanting you two to break up, but you were really good together.
- Ted Mosby: Yeah. We were. She just wasn't the one, you know?
- Barney Stinson: "The one." Oh, Ted, no! Do not tell me you're gonna start searching for the one again. The only time I wanna hear you saying "the one" is if it's followed by the word "hundred." What up?
- Lily Aldrin: I had four strawberries.
- Ted Mosby: Was there a side of champagne with each of those strawberries?
- Lily Aldrin: [burping] Yes!
- Marshall Eriksen: Lily, you could have burped, or said the word yes, but the fact that you did both is exactly why I married you.
- Ted Mosby: Why is this the first I've heard of Argentina?
- Robin Scherbatsky: Ummm, American schools suck at geography?
- Robin Scherbatsky: What would be the point in telling you that I want to live in Argentina? You don't want to live there.
- Ted Mosby: I could want to live in Argentina.
- Robin Scherbatsky: No, you couldn't. I mean, you life is here and your career. I'm a journalist, my career could take me anywhere, and I hope it does.
- Ted Mosby: Hey. I could be an architect anywhere, too. They have buildings in Argentina. And Paris. And even Tokyo. I don't know if you ever saw Godzilla, but he wasn't knocking down a bunch of tents.
- Robin Scherbatsky: Well, you say you want to move to Argentina, but you want to have kids.
- Ted Mosby: Oh, right. 'Cause there are no kids there. On Santa's map of the world, there's a big black "X" over Argentina.
- Robin Scherbatsky: You know what I mean.
- Ted Mosby: No, I don't. Okay, say we had kids. They wouldn't have to grow up in some suburb somewhere. They would grow up on the road having adventures with us. Think of all the Hard Rock Cafe T-shirts they could collect.
- Robin Scherbatsky: Ted, you know that kids were never a part of my plan. But if I was going to have someone's babies, I'd have your babies.
- Barney Stinson: [At the wedding] That's when you run. Tell me you ran, Ted!