- Minka Kropotkin: Why do we always have to do things your vay Mr. Big-Shot?
- Grandpa Boris: Because my way is right! That's why!
- Minka Kropotkin: Vey!
- Charlotte Pickles: Now, Jonathan, listen carefully, his highness and I had a little misunderstanding on the phone and now he's not taking my calls, I want you find him and grovel shamelessly.
- Minka Kropotkin: Since when is spotty old glasses a part of Jewish tradition?
- Grandpa Boris: For your information, these are my father's wine glasses. They came all the way from Smolensk.
- Minka Kropotkin: Vell, my mother;'s vine glasses came from Vilnius, and they got no spots all over them.
- Stu Pickles: [driving to Boris and Minka's house] Deed, are you sure this whole ceremony is reading necessary? It's so boring.
- Didi Pickles: Passover isn't boring. It's a very meaningful holiday.
- Stu Pickles: Well, if it's so meaningful, how come there's no presents?
- Didi Pickles: Stu, the passover seder is a time for Jewish families to come together and retell the history of their people. We've been doing it for thousands of years.
- Stu Pickles: Sounds boring to me.
- Stu Pickles: This bitter herb that we eat.
- Didi Pickles: Bitter herb? Stu, don't you mean erb?
- Stu Pickles: I thought it was herb.
- Didi Pickles: No, it's definitely erb.
- Stu Pickles: Are you sure?
- Didi Pickles: Stu, it's not important, keep reading.
- Stu Pickles: This bitter... You know, Deed, a lot of people DO say herb.
- Charlotte Pickles: [upon realizing she locked herself in the attic] Gee, I wonder if there's a fax machine here?
- Charlotte Pickles: [on the phone] Listen, Jonathan, the Passover seder is about to start, so I won't be available by phone for the next couple of hours. Right, now, if his highness decides to accept our bid, call me on my beeper, and then send a copy of the signed contract to my car fax.
- Grandpa Boris: You know, Minka makes the best matzah ball soup this side of Minsk.
- Minka Kropotkin: [modest] Boris, you're making me flush.