Edward Asner credited as playing...
Carl Fredricksen
- Carl Fredricksen: This is crazy. I finally meet my childhood hero and he's trying to kill us. What a joke.
- Dug: Hey, I know a joke! A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for the winter and now I am dead." Ha! It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.
- [Carl, in his once-again airborne house, suddenly hears a knock at the front door]
- Carl Fredricksen: [Surprised] Russell?
- [opens the door to find Dug on his doorstep and is very happy]
- Carl Fredricksen: [Smiles] Dug!
- Dug: [Looking sad] I was hiding under your porch because I love you. Can I stay?
- Carl Fredricksen: [Delightfully] Can you stay? Why, you're my dog, aren't you? And I'm your master!
- Dug: [His sadness turns to happiness. As he happily wags his tail] You are my master? Oh, boy! Oh, boy!
- [lunges forward and covers Carl in slobbery kisses]
- Carl Fredricksen: [laughing] Good boy, Dug. You're a good boy.
- Carl Fredricksen: Hey, let's play a game. It's called "See Who Can Be Quiet the Longest".
- Russell: Cool! My mom loves that game!
- Construction Foreman Tom: This is serious. He's out to get your house!
- Carl Fredricksen: Tell your boss he can *have* our house.
- Construction Foreman Tom: Really?
- Carl Fredricksen: When I'm dead!
- [goes inside and slams the front door]
- Construction Foreman Tom: I'll take that as a maybe!
- Russell: [reading from his scout handbook in monotone] Good afternoon. My name is Russell, and I am a Wilderness Explorer in Tribe 54, Sweatlodge 12. Are you in need of any assistance today, sir?
- Carl Fredricksen: No.
- Russell: I could help you cross the street.
- Carl Fredricksen: No.
- Russell: I could help you cross your yard.
- Carl Fredricksen: No.
- Russell: I could help you cross your... porch?
- Carl Fredricksen: No.
- Russell: Well, I gotta help you cross *something*!
- Russell: [Whining] I'm tired! My knee hurts!
- Carl Fredricksen: Which knee?
- Russell: ...My elbow hurts!
- Russell: A wilderness explorer is a friend to all, be a plant or fish or tiny mole!
- Carl Fredricksen: That doesn't even rhyme!
- Russell: [offended] Yeah it does.
- Carl Fredricksen: [after his house hits a cliff and shatters a window] I am nobody's master, got it? I don't want you here
- [points his cane at Dug]
- Carl Fredricksen: and I don't want you here!
- [points it at Kevin]
- Carl Fredricksen: [addressing Russell] I'm stuck with you, but if you two don't clear out of here by the time I count to three...
- Dug: Oh! A ball! Oh, boy! Oh, boy! A ball!
- [whines]
- Carl Fredricksen: Ball?
- [chuckles]
- Carl Fredricksen: You want it, boy?
- Dug: Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
- Carl Fredricksen: Huh? Huh?
- Dug: Yes, I do! I so ever do want the ball!
- Carl Fredricksen: Go get it!
- [throws the ball]
- Dug: Oh, boy! Oh, boy! I will go get it and then bring it back!
- [runs off]
- Carl Fredricksen: Russell, give me some chocolate.
- [grabs a piece of chocolate from Russell and throws it into the bushes, leaving Kevin to run off after it]
- [Carl, with his house high in the air, hears a knock at the door and finds Russell on the front porch]
- Russell: Hi, Mr. Fredricksen! It's me, Russell!
- Carl Fredricksen: What are you doing out here, kid?
- Russell: I found the snipe and I followed it under your porch, but this snipe had a long tail and looked more like a large mouse.
- [Russell's Wilderness Explorers flag blows away in the wind]
- Russell: Please let me in.
- Carl Fredricksen: No.
- [Carl goes inside and slams the door. Russell waits uncertainly a few moments]
- Carl Fredricksen: [opens the door] Oh, all right. You can come...
- [Russell races past Carl into the house]
- Carl Fredricksen: ...in.
- [Carl just saved Russell, tied to a chair, from falling to his death off Muntz' Airship, and leaves him on the porch]
- Russell: But I want to help!
- Carl Fredricksen: I don't want your help, I want you safe.
- Russell: [points to Kevin] I found the snipe!
- Carl Fredricksen: [amused] Oh, did you now?
- [chuckles]
- Russell: Are they tall?
- Carl Fredricksen: Oh, yes. They're very tall.
- Russell: Do they have a lot of colors?
- Carl Fredricksen: They do, indeed!
- Russell: Do they like chocolate?
- Carl Fredricksen: Ye... chocolate?
- [he turns around and sees Kevin]
- Carl Fredricksen: Gaah! What is that thing?
- Russell: [off screen in the jungle] Mr. Fredricksen? Am I supposed to dig the hole before or after?
- Carl Fredricksen: Nyaa! None of my concern!
- Russell: [after a pause] Oh... It's before!
- Carl Fredricksen: Nyaa!
- [covers his ears and shakes his head]
- Russell: [Carl and Russell find Dug in a South American desert; Russel pets him] Hey, I like dogs!
- Carl Fredricksen: [calling out] We have your dog!
- Russell: [Dug walks around Russell] Whoa.
- Carl Fredricksen: I wonder who he belongs to?
- Russell: Sit, boy.
- [Dug sits]
- Russell: Hey look, he's trained! Shake.
- [Dug shakes his paw]
- Russell: Uh-huh. Speak.
- Dug: Hi there.
- Carl Fredricksen: [He and Russell make surprised exclamations] Did that dog just say "Hi there"?
- Dug: Oh, yes.
- Carl Fredricksen: Whaa!
- Dug: My name is Dug. I have just met you, and I love you.
- [he jumps up on Carl]
- Carl Fredricksen: Wha...
- Dug: My master made me this collar. He is a good and smart master and he made me this collar so that I may speak. Squirrel!
- [looks to distance for a few seconds]
- Dug: My master is good and smart.
- Carl Fredricksen: It's not possible!
- Dug: Oh, it is because my master is smart!
- Russell: Cool! What do these do, boy?
- Russell: [Russell starts to fiddle with a dial on Dug's collar, causing him to cycle through languages and different voices] Hey would you - cuerdo con tigo - I use that collar - watashi wa hanashi ma - to talk with. I would be happy if you stop.
- Carl Fredricksen: Russell, don't touch that. It could be... radioactive or something.
- Dug: I am a great tracker. My pack sent me on a special mission, all by myself. Have you seen a bird? I am going to find one, and I am on the scent. I am a great tracker; did I mention that?
- [Dug is suddenly attacked by Kevin, who shrieks in Dug's face after pinning him to the ground]
- Dug: Hey, that is the bird! I have never seen one up close, but this is the bird. May I take your bird back to camp as my prisoner?
- Carl Fredricksen: Yes, yes, take it! And on the way, learn how to bark like a real dog!
- Dug: Oh, I can bark.
- [barks]
- Dug: And this is howling.
- [howls]
- Russell: [Kevin screeches] Can we keep him? Please, please, please?
- Carl Fredricksen: No.
- Russell: But it's a TALKING DOG!
- Carl Fredricksen: It's just a weird trick or something. Let's get to the falls.
- Carl Fredricksen: You'd better get up, Russell. Or else, the tigers will come and eat you.
- Russell: There are no Tigers in South America. Zoology.
- Carl Fredricksen: I can't tell where we are.
- Russell: Oh, we're in South America, all right. It was a cinch with my Wilderness Explorer GPS.
- Carl Fredricksen: GP what?
- Russell: My dad gave it to me; it shows exactly where we are on the planet!
- [runs to window making beeping sounds]
- Russell: With this baby, we'll never be lost!
- [gestures and accidentally throws the unit out the window]
- Russell: Oops.
- Carl Fredricksen: [after throwing both a ball and chocolate into the jungle to get rid of Dug and Kevin, Carl runs with his house for a considerable distance] There. We should've gone enough. We should be rid of them now.
- [looks to his left and sees Dug]
- Dug: [with the ball in his mouth] Hi, Master.
- [Carl turns to his right and Kevin squawks in his ear]
- Russell: I've never been in a floating house before.
- [Russell sees a picture of Ellie and laughs]
- Russell: Goggles. Look at this stuff. Wow! You're going on a trip?
- [Russell picks up a picture of Paradise Falls and reads from it]
- Russell: "Paradise Falls, a land lost in time." You're going to South America, Mr. Fredricksen?
- [Carl grabs the picture from Russell]
- Carl Fredricksen: Don't touch that! You'll soil it.
- Russell: You know, most people take a plane, but you're smart because you'll have all your TV and clocks and stuff.
- Russell: Hey look, buildings! That building's so close, I can almost touch it!
- Russell: [In Carl's thought] Wow! This is great! You should try this, Mr. Fredricksen! Look, there's a bus stop that could take me home two blocks away! Heyy, I can see your house from here!
- Carl Fredricksen: [pulling on rope] Don't jerk around so much, kid -
- [let's go, shocked]
- Russell: AHH!
- [fades away]
- Carl Fredricksen: [back in reality] Well, that's not gonna work.
- Dug: Oh, please, oh, please, oh, please be my prisoner!
- Russell: Dug, stop bothering Kevin!
- Dug: That man there says I should take the bird...
- [Kevin squacks at Dug]
- Dug: ... and I love that man there like he is my master.
- Carl Fredricksen: I am not your master!
- Dug: I am warning you once again, bird!
- Russell: Hey! Quit it!
- Dug: I am jumping on you now, bird!
- Carl Fredricksen: Russell, at this rate we'll never get to the falls!
- Dug: Here, bird!