David Koechner credited as playing...
Joey Krenshaw
- Kindergarten Teacher: They wanted to give you this.
- [hands Harold and Joey a poster from the kids]
- Little Girl: It's a picture of you!
- Harold Krenshaw: That's me, huh?
- [looking at the sketch of him on the poster]
- Harold Krenshaw: Well, I hope not! Look at the size of my head!
- Joey Krenshaw: I'm surprised you can stand up!
- [They laugh together]
- Harold Krenshaw: [noticing an unusual bridge-shaped object on the poster] And what is that?
- Little Boy: The Golden Gate Bridge.
- Harold Krenshaw: Really! What's keeping it up? Magic? Because I don't see any suspension cables! Joey, you got a pen?
- [to the kids]
- Harold Krenshaw: What's the matter with you?
- [draws lines on the drawing of the Golden Gate Bridge with a Sharpie]
- Harold Krenshaw: NOW it's a bridge.
- Joey Krenshaw: It's basic physics.
- Kindergarten Teacher: They're only six years old.
- Harold Krenshaw: They're not going to learn any younger. That's what my Uncle Ronnie always says.
- Joey Krenshaw: [notices an unusual drawing in the corner] What's this? A bird? My God, it must be 20 feet long!
- Harold Krenshaw: Yeah! It looks like Mothra. Remember that old movie?
- [Harold and Joey make a scene imitating the screaming from Mothra]
- Kindergarten Teacher: [nervously] You're on the school board?
- Harold Krenshaw: Yeah.
- Joey Krenshaw: [takes a call on his phone] Hello?
- Dr. Levine: Mr. Krenshaw?
- Joey Krenshaw: That's right.
- Dr. Levine: This is Dr. Levine calling from Reno. You wanted me to call if there was a change in your uncle's condition. I'm afraid it doesn't look good. You might think about coming home to say goodbye.
- Joey Krenshaw: How long does he have?
- Dr. Levine: Five days, maybe a week. I'm sorry, sir.
- Joey Krenshaw: Thank you, doctor.
- [Walks back over to Harold, who has been making lots of edits to the poster the children brought in]
- Joey Krenshaw: All right, kids, you've got your notes. Why don't you go back to school and try again.
- [Hands the poster over to them]
- Harold Krenshaw: That was nice. Who was that?
- [referring to the person on the phone]
- Joey Krenshaw: Cousin, that was money calling, endorsement money. You ever heard of Neptune Energy Bars?
- Harold Krenshaw: No.
- Joey Krenshaw: Well, they've heard of you. They want to pay you $10,000 to be in their next commercial. Yeah, they're on a tight schedule. They need to shoot tomorrow morning. You think you're up for it?