Steve Carell credited as playing...
Michael Scott
- Oscar Martinez: Okay. Once in a while, I'll take a long lunch.
- Michael Scott: A siesta.
- Dwight Schrute: Time thief. Time thief. Fire him!
- Jim Halpert: Dwight, you've really never stolen any company time?
- Dwight Schrute: Never.
- Michael Scott: You are a thief of joy.
- Michael Scott: When I discovered YouTube, I didn't work for five days. I did nothing. I watched Cookie Monster sing Chocolate Rain about a thousand times.
- Meredith Palmer: Am I in trouble here or something?
- Michael Scott: No. No, this is just a stupid formality.
- Holly Flax: No, it's not a formality. Now, were these "meet-ups" just personal, unrelated to business?
- Meredith Palmer: No. I wouldn't have done it if it wasn't for the discount paper. There's not a lot of fruit in those looms.
- Michael Scott: Ugh. For the love of God, we're trying to help you, you stupid bag.
- Michael Scott: This, I think, was a great ethics seminar. She has given us a lot of wonderful things to think about. Right, what is wrong - who's to say, really, in the end? I mean, because it is... unknowable. But let's give her a round of applause.