Signing his name as "Chuck Lords", Paul Thomas does a poor job with "On the Couch", a vehicle for Brit import Nikki Jayne who despite her striking height (emphasized by high heels of course) proves to be a bland non-starter in the Universe of Vivid contract girls. She seems to have been discovered by self-appointed porn talent scout B. Skow, who also handles the camera in this video filler.
I used to wonder who "Chuck Lords" was, touted on the back liners of a hundred Vivid releases but strictly unknown. PT maintains the fiction even though rather ludicrously we see him, one of the most recognizable guys in the Adult Cinema hall of fame, with a super identifying him as Chuck Lords in the BTS short subject, directing his actors.
Billed as a "vignette" feature, the show has linkage in Thomas's meager script, but so bare bones that in fact it does play as stand-alone style vignettes, the preferred mode for porn a decade later in our now streaming-dominated era. But the DVD release unfolds as if a real film, with Jayne rather unconvincing as an actress, seeing a shrink (a very mannered performance by Tony DeSergio, who seems to have thought he was auditioning for a leading role in a Harold Pinter play rather than PT porn) on the advice of her friend Monica (uber-busty Sara Stone).
SPOILERS for ANYONE WHO ACTUALLY CARES:
I've signalled the Spoiler alert to discuss the rest of the video, even though it is an open question whether in this modern era one can actually "spoil" the enjoyment of a porn video by revealing any or all plot details, given the zero interest of late by both the mass of viewers and more significantly the pornographers themselves in such extra-sexual matters.
The five sex segments unfold as largely flashbacks as Nikki tells her story to the uppity DeSergio. First one has Nikki humping young Chris Johnson, the fiancée of her purported BFF Stone. PT muffs the opportunity for slapstick sex comedy when Stone arrives, failing to catch the transgressing duo in flagrante delicto.
Next flashback has Jayne tempting James Deen with her gold bikini (later topless) while he's diligently attending to his garden. Unable to hump her he takes out his blue balls on his busty wife Victoria Valentina, a mean-spirited display of misogyny as Deen mistreats her sexually in his usual manner, though this time it is PT's fault as proved by his explicit directions on what to do to her shown in the BTS rehearsal. Valentina's acting ability is nonexistent, evidenced by her particularly poor line readings.
The shrink raises the concept of incest in discussing with Nikki her relationship with her father, and we get a more interesting flashback of the real-life married team of Marcus London and Devon Lee playing her parents. We get to see London hump Lee, but his longing glances at daughter Nikki certainly convey at least a Jimmy Carter-level lust after his offspring,
Final flashback is a bit more creative, as we see Christian and Nikki having an argument, as he's breaking up with her, but it turns out to be merely actors auditioning for acting coach Brooke Banner. Pal Sara Stone is enlisted to act out the same scene with Christian to show Nikki how to act, resulting in a threesome for Mr. C, Sara and Brooke after Nikki storms off. At least there was a token attempt to inject this sex filler into the overall film by having Nikki as the temporary link during the vignette.
FINAL SPOILER for HARDY SOULS STILL READING:
Finale is oh-so predictable, as the cuckoo clock sounds and Nikki's hour of therapy comes to an end (DeSergio had threatened to call a halt after just a couple of minutes back in the first scene, so displeased was he with the new patient's behavior, flashing him a beaver or two as if Sharon Stone had been on the couch instead). Of course they have sex on said couch, but -SPOILER- after big Tony's money shot it turns out to be just a sexual fantasy of masturbatory Nikki. This is a very disappointing finish, close to representing a PT direct insult to his audience - oh I forgot -it was just a Chuck Lords insult.
I have seen Nikki used well on screen a couple of times bookending her short career: debut for Harmony Films in England, and a later soft-core cameo in Nica Noelle's "A Man with a Maid" Victorian porn saga, but she is one big nothing when it comes to porn stars for the ages.
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